Rubie rubie rubie rubie so ho!

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 20:35:05 GMT

Title: Building Me Up To Tear me Down
Author: rubie_so_ho
Pairing/Character: Logan POV, mentions L/V, L/L
Word Count: 1,412
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The rise and fall of Logan Echolls
Spoilers/Warnings: Season 1
A/N: My challenge for the "Cheesy Love Song Challenge" was "Something About You," by Boston. It's a happy song, but...I couldn't help but to write something a little angsty. I usually write happy things (as many may know), and felt like something different. X-posted to cheesy_love and veronicamarsfic.

--

When I was younger I thought I could stand on my own
It wasn’t easy, I stood like a man made of stone.

He could not remember when the abuse began. For as long as he could recall, the scars marred his skin, soft and white against his rough tan.

He cannot remember the last time he felt whole. Even as a kid, he always felt like a shell of a real person. The shell was a happy-go-lucky rich boy – a young man with all the toys, all the luxuries, all the leisure, and all the friends that his daddy’s money could buy. The shell was a wise-cracking spoiled brat.

The shell was façade of bullshit.

Who was the boy beneath it all?

He was a broken toy. He was his father’s punching bag, his sister’s scapegoat.

He was his mother’s pride and joy.

But his mother herself was hidden by a mere shell; a shell of beauty and poise which covered the reek of whiskey and the dazedness that only her precious pills could create.

When her shell fell away, she self-destructed, washing away with the midday tide.

He was never whole with the girl. She did not complete him. She was his mistress, his leader. He was right; she never really loved him. She was all flash and sass and sex and red lips. She was curves and hot-blooded kisses. She was urgency. But she was never his.

He was hers, always. They were all hers, little puppets in her show. Jake, Duncan, Veronica, Weevil, Aaron… they belonged to her.

She never belonged to any of them. She never belonged to him.

He erroneously believed she made him whole, made him worth something – something in a world where he had been convinced he meant nothing. It was simple – she gave him attention. She gave him her lips. She gave him her sex. She hung onto him in the halls, at parties, at games.

But her heart? Her heart was hers, till the day she was taken away. Her heart was only hers, never theirs, never his.

Little by little, bit by bit, he came to realize how little he’d measured up in the Lilly-ruled universe.

It was then that the face of the shell changed. The surface cracked, and the coldness Aaron created seeped forward.

“I can be difficult too, sometimes.”

He’d gone over to the dark side, bit by agonizing bit.

One day he was golden boy. The next, he was a tire-iron-wielding, bum-fight-leading, best-friend-antagonizing jackass.

One day he lived to please the women in his life. The next, he lived to drive another insane, striving to be the bane of her existence.

One day he was the pawn, the patsy, the submissive. The next, he was the gamemaster, the ringleader, the authoritarian.

For once, he had succeeded in something. He succeeded in becoming less than the boy inside, and a cruel shadow of the shell.

He could not remember the last time he felt whole.

-

But there was something about you
I want you to know
It brought a change over me
It’s startin’ to show

-

Little by little, bit by bit, the boy reemerged.

He had sunk to his lowest point, tattered and torn. The only thing that remained was a shred of something – of what, he did not know. He could not remember where the boy started, where the shell took over – he did not recall where this began or that ended.

But the boy resurfaced, seeing light once again.

At his nadir, she had plunged to catch him, to set him afloat.

She… his adversary, his competitor, his blight, his curse…

She rose to his aid. All at once she had changed; she was his savior, his rescuer, his liberator,

His angel.

Pulling him from the depths, she rocked him like he was a child.

She was the mother he had lost. She was the Lilly he wished Lilly had been.

But at the end of the day, she was Veronica Mars, Miss Contradiction-in-Terms.

He arose, a phoenix from the flames… born again, he was stronger, renewed, alive…

From that point forward, he fought. He fought to stay this way, fought to be the boy he once was,

Fought to be the man she wanted.

-

I’ve got this feelin’ inside
Gotta have ya, have ya, ain’t no good to hide

-

When he heard her voice in despair over the phone his heart felt like it sank deep into his abdomen.

It was the only impetus he needed to spring into action.

“…to the Camelot?”

His tires squealed out of the high school parking lot, and he headed due west.

She saved him. She saved him. She saved him.

So desperately, he wanted and needed to save her. It was the only answer, the only act that would close the circle.

He beat them there. Who was the man on the phone, and what did he want with her? What would he do to her? Was it too late? He crept around a corner and waited, hoping they would ascend to the second floor. He took a wild guess.

Hearing voices, he relaxed. She sounded troubled, but fully intact. She sounded scared, but strong.

Footsteps approached, and he waited not a moment too long, coming down like a hailstorm, saving the only person who had ever dared to save him.

Later, only at her bidding, he left her with the impostor.

When she emerged, a feeling of pure relief washed over him. She was undamaged, untouched, whole. He calmed at the simple sight of her.

He expected no signs of gratitude – he had not deigned to ever pay her the courtesy, why should she? She thanked him nonetheless, and her lips tasted like appreciation. A jolt struck him. That which he had only dreamed about had occurred, but even so, astonishment overtook his senses.

His surprise gave him no delay; he took the thanks as a sign: his opening, his opportunity. Seizing the occasion, he pushed his way in, his eagerness striving to possess her entirely. He wanted all of her, all of this, the moment – forever. All he had was but a few moments – or were they minutes? – and his only break was to sample her soul.

She left, and she took a piece of him with her.

For a short time, he loved her in secret.

She was everything he wanted, everything he needed. She started to fill in the cracks, every kiss a building block, every stolen glance a nugget, every touch a piece of salvation.

Her every move, every word, every act was like salve to his wounds. She built him back up, and she didn’t even know it. Her mere existence healed him: healed the cracks forged by Aaron, deepened by Lilly, shattered by Lynn.

The boy…the shell…the shadow…became one. He was a man. He was hers. She was his. For once, he belonged to someone who belonged back.

He wanted to shout his love from the rooftops, proclaim it to the world. But there were people to protect, and appearances to maintain.

He couldn’t remember the last time he felt whole.

Until she loved him.

It was near-perfection.

But near-perfection never lasts.

It isn’t easy
To show what I’m feeling inside, girl
It isn’t easy
I know, when you believe in a man like me

The ruse was shattered, and the world threatened to fall apart.
His only hope lay in a profession of trust between kisses. Foolishly, he thought this was enough to keep him going, to keep him together, to keep him whole. He felt strong, new, invincible. They were unbeatable and unbreakable.

Unbeknownst to him, the cracks reappeared.

And just as she had built him up, she tore him down.

--

When I get angry I say things I don’t wanna say
I really mean it, I don’t want to leave you this way

--

His savior was his ruination.

The wreckage that remained cursed her existence.

Nothing…he was nothing.

When you are zero, you cease to be even a whisper on the wind.

When you don’t exist, no one notices.

His departure, he knew, would not register.

--

But there was something about…
Yeah there was something about you.

He could remember the last time he felt whole. It was in her arms, beneath her kisses, in the embrace of her eyes, under the caress of her touch.

He prepared to jump.

Fic: In a Crowded place, Chap. 5/5, R (L/V, Logan POV)

Fri, 24 Mar 2006 21:18:20 GMT

Title: In a Crowded Place, Chap. 5/5 - Complete
Author: rubie_so_ho (Amanda)
Rating: R (suggestive phrase)
Word Count: 3,092
Pairing: Logan and Veronica, Logan POV, (cameos by Dick & Beaver)
Spoilers: Up to 2x14 (not even, but just to be sure)
Summary: Logan tries to deal with the possibility that he'll never get her back...
Disclaimer: All Rob's, boo.
Other Disclaimer: I got the title from "You're Beautiful," by James Blunt. Lyrics to follow at bottom.
A/N: I lurve feedback!

--

It’d been a week since Duncan left for Napa. The suite felt cold and empty, and Logan avoided staying there. He spent his days bumming around town with Dick and occasionally Beaver. The three of them would while their mornings away in the surf, until their backs and legs ached from over-activity. They spent their afternoons lounging on the beach, tanning their already-overexposed skin under the midday sun’s rays.

This day was no different than the rest. After surfing for a few hours and catching lunch from a nearby hot dog stand, the boys settled into the sand. Logan laid back with one arm resting beneath his head. He stared up into the cloudless sky as he felt the sand shift to accommodate his body. The salt from the ocean began to dry against his deeply-tanned skin, leaving him feeling grimy and brittle. He constantly rewetted his lips, licking them every few seconds, trying to escape the feeling that he was drying up into nothingness, about to become one with the sand below him.

Logan had been tired and muted the past few days, and he knew that it had not gone unnoticed by the brothers Casablancas. Despite their concern, they refrained from bothering him. They didn’t even appear to mind when he was noticeably silent during their daily brotherly bickerings. Logan knew that Dick had told Beaver about Fallout 2006, and was thankful that they were leaving him alone.

Alone. He felt as though he personified it.

He hadn’t heard from her since that day, that moment…when she’d walked into the living room, before he and Dick, her face flushed with embarrassment. She had hastily retreated, doing what she did best. Her avoidance of him felt familiar, like a worn-out old coat. She ran. He hated this quality of hers once, but now he was complacent.

He was convinced this was the way it would always be.

The waters would get rough, too difficult to navigate. And she would bail.

During the past days, as he lay baking in the sand beneath the hot midsummer sun, he had considered a life without her.

Her admission of love for him did not fool him. His heart had soared with joy at first, but he had been brought back down to earth with realization. She had only confessed her feelings after being backed into a corner, and only at Duncan’s behest.

So he allowed himself to ponder what moving on would feel like.

He’d never moved on, not ever. He’d gotten over Lilly when his lips first brushed against Veronica’s, but nothing ever cured him of his Veronica-hangover. When his hips would grind into Kendall’s, he thought of Veronica. When Hannah’s lithe body draped against his in a sweet embrace, he thought of Veronica. She permeated his very being. She never left, not really.

But she’d become a part of him, like a limb, an eye, an ear. He couldn’t really function without her. She was his crutch.

He needed to cut her out.

Her absence, her silence – made it clear to him that she wasn’t going to be his. Not again. Not ever.

Every so often, as he lay in the sand next to the boisterous Casablancases, he would open one eye and attempt to check out the beach beauties that passed before them. He would nod as Dick would whistle lewdly but appreciatively at the cute, tanned girls in their cute, expensive bikinis.

To no avail, however. No matter how pretty their faces, how sweet their curves, none of them rivaled her beauty in his mind’s eye.

It drove him insane.

On this day, he fidgeted. He felt uncomfortable, uneasy, insatiable. He felt more and more delicate under the drying sea salt, and itchy from the sand beneath him. His hair felt waxy and dirty. He tasted like salt and dirt. And he was restless. He was pissed, sad, and frustrated.

He wanted to purge himself. Purge himself of her.

And that is why, in the middle of the day, as Dick and Beaver discussed the pros and cons of women’s pierced tongues, he leapt up, screaming, and hurled himself into the ocean with all the force he could muster.

He plunged his body deep beneath the waves, wiggling his body like a dolphin would. The rocks and shells and debris on the ocean floor scraped his stomach, but he didn’t flinch. He dove deeper and deeper till he felt the pressure rising in his ears and his lungs. He stopped, and gave into life, gave into nature, gave into complacency. With a wry smile of surrender painted on his lips, he allowed the air in his lungs and his relative weightlessness to push him to the surface. As he rose, he screamed again, and when he broke the plane between water and sky, his screams sounded out against the mid-afternoon air, punctuated by heavy coughs and the beginnings of a sob.

She made him feel helpless. How could one person make another feel like this? Was it healthy? He bet that it wasn’t.

He turned in the water, treading in place. He choked on the brackish air around him, and breathed heavily to regain some composure.

Yards and yards away he could see Dick and Beaver on the edge of the water, shouting and waving their arms. He wasn’t far out enough to miss the look of confusion on Dick’s pretty-boy face, or the expression of pure fear on Beaver’s.

He sympathized with Beaver at that moment. He was scared, too.

He sucked in a long breath and dipped below the surface again. He opened up his eyes underwater, and it was dark. All he could see was bits of detritus floating through the water, fluttering against the rays of light piercing through the waves. He stared straight ahead. He felt so alone, so hurt.

Where had she been? He had been too afraid to call her, but he thought she’d have called him, or stopped by.

She’d left a few things about the suite. Occasionally he would find a hair tie, or a necklace, or a piece of paper she’d scribbled on. She was everywhere in the suite. Her scent tinged the stale air. The shower still smelled like her shampoo. It was funny to him. Duncan hadn’t left a trace of himself anywhere. But she was a constant.

He bobbed to the surface again, and looked out toward his friends. They were no longer shouting and screaming or flailing like idiots.

They were talking to their newly arrived visitor and her four-legged companion.

He placed his face in the water and blew bubbles for a long moment. Lifting his head just enough so his eyes peered out across the waves’ surface, he could see Dick and Beaver standing with their hands on their hips, shaking their respective heads and talking to the visitor.

She lifted her hand to shield her eyes as she looked out over the water. Logan felt like melting into the ocean.

He watched her from afar. She looked puzzled and concerned. Biting her lower lip, she appeared to make a decision, and she handed Dick Backup’s leash. Crossing her arms around her body, she lifted her shirt above her head and threw it on the ground. As she moved, Logan held his breath, only to see that she’d come prepared, bathing suit and all. She continued to look toward him as she kicked off her flip-flops and shorts in one sweeping motion.

Logan tread water cautiously, willing himself to stay in that spot. He fought against the current, kicking through the water as though he were walking backward.

She walked out to the water without hesitation, and he watched as her body was slowly enveloped by the waves, until all he saw was a shock of blonde hair against the dark turquoise of the sea. She lifted her arms over the water and swam slowly and methodically in his direction.

She stopped a foot in front of him and began to tread, too. She watched his arms and matched his rhythm.

“So. Whatcha doin’?” she intoned. Her breaths created little ripples in the water under her nose.

“Nothing.” He looked at the ripples, avoiding her eyes.

“Ah. I see.” She squinted at him. “So I guess ‘nothing’ includes running into the ocean, screaming at the top of your lungs, and scaring the bejesus out of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dick?”

“Yes, exactly that.”

“Mm-hmm.” She didn’t look satisfied. “Okay Logan, I’ll bite. What is up with you, anyway?”

“Blurbleblurblah,” he mumbled into the water.

“Ahem.” She lifted a finger out and tipped his chin up. “Repetez, s’il vous plait.”

“Oui, Mademoiselle Mars.” He laughed half-heartedly. “I don’t know. I just…felt like having a scream.”

“I don’t know what you’re selling, Echolls, but I ain’t buying.”

“Yeah, well, you wouldn’t.” He wasn’t sure what that meant, but he said it with defiance sharpening his tongue.

“Huh?” Yeah, his thoughts exactly. He had no idea what he was saying, or what to say.

“Where have you been, Veronica?” he felt his heart sink deeper into his chest, but summoned enough courage to finally look her in the eye.

“I’ve been…busy.” It was her turn to avoid eye contact. She leaned her head back, wetting her hair up to her forehead.

“Busy…not talking to me?”

She whipped her head forward, a shocked expression gracing her features. “You’re one to talk!”

He gave her a look of ‘Who? Me?’

“Yes, you. You,” she reached forward a finger to poke him in the chest, “could have called me, you know.”

“I’m not sure there’s anything for us to talk about, Veronica,” he breathed out bitterly. He reached up a hand to caress the spot she’d poked. He thought he felt an indentation above his heart.

“Oh.”

They stared at each other, treading water in time. Veronica looked up at the sky, tipping her head back again. She stretched her arms out to her side, and stroked them through the water in one, strong movement until she was further away from him, and that much closer to the shore. Her tiny feet and legs followed until they were stretched out in front of her.

Logan watched silently as she floated in front of him. Her body bobbed against the light surf. Her chest heaved up and down, her breaths stronger on the ups than the downs as she tried to retain buoyancy. Her fingers fluttered out, making invisible patterns in the water.

Her feet were close to his face, and he observed with subtle amusement as she wiggled her toes at him.

He didn’t dare speak. He didn’t know just what to say.

There were so many possibilities.

‘Get away from me.’ ‘Go.’ ‘Leave. You do it so well.’

‘You’re my disease.’

His heart ached.

‘I love you.’

‘Don’t leave me, Veronica. Not again.’

He felt the rumblings of a wave beneath him, a strong, vengeful undercurrent. His feet lifted in response. It traveled beneath him, over and out to the shore, and it tried to take Veronica with it.

In one swift movement, he reached out to grasp her tiny foot in his hand. As the current made its way out from under them, he pulled against it, kicking his legs with a prayer swirling in his head.

She didn’t fight him. She pulled her arms close to her body, streamlining his process. She lifted her head up and snuck a hopeful glance at him.

“No you don’t,” he uttered, pulling her closer.

“Don’t what?”

“Leave me. Don’t leave me.”

She raised her eyebrows with curiosity.

He attempted to recover. “I didn’t want you to wash away with the wave. The undertow, it could have…it would have pulled you under.”

“Uh huh.”

“And that…” he stuttered, “that-that would be unfortunate.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, because, I mean…who would solve Neptune’s trivial mysteries of the week? Surely not Weevil. What the kid’s got in moxy he lacks in smarts.” His embarrassment morphed into a sly grin.

She threw her head back in mock-laughter, then faced him with apparent seriousness. “What about you, Watson? You’ve gotten pretty good at this sleuthing stuff yourself.”

“Was that a compliment from Miss Veronica Mars, Super-Sleuth?” He feigned shock.

She shook her head. “I wouldn’t go that far…”

“Well, I would sleuth, Mars, but I’m thinking Papa Keith wouldn’t warm up to his new sidekick that easily.”

“Silly. Just because he starts cleaning his rifle when you’re name’s mentioned doesn’t mean he dislikes you.” She smiled sweetly at him.

Logan broke into easy, genuine laughter.

Veronica interrupted his reveling. “Ew. I’m getting pruney.” She was looking down at her fingers, and picked around the edges of her cuticles.

“Well, let’s get out then.” He hastily moved to swim towards shore.

“Um…okay.” He swore he could hear a tinge of disappointment in her voice.

They swam to shore. Logan let Veronica swim a little in front of him, and he watched to make sure she was safe and untouched. When they arrived to the beach, they noticed that Beaver and Dick had fallen asleep on their towels in the sand. Dick’s hand was perched on his chest, with Backup’s leash wrapped tightly around his wrist.

Logan bent down and untwined the leash, loosing Backup from Dick’s grip. Backup happily trotted to Logan and began licking the saltwater off his legs. Logan laughed and stooped down. “Hey, boy. Hey.” Backup began licking his face eagerly. “Guess you missed me.”

“Yeah.”

He looked up when Veronica spoke. She stood over him and Backup, casting a tiny sprite’s shadow over them.

She opened her mouth once more. “We did.”

Logan looked down at Backup and hugged the dog awkwardly. He could hear Backup’s happy pant, and he smiled.

“Right, Backup?” Veronica asked, crouching down before them.

Logan didn’t speak. He continued to pat Backup and pushed his nose against the dog’s soft head.

“Backup and I had a discussion earlier.” Logan peered up at her and nodded.

“Backup said, ‘V., I really miss that Logan guy. He’s the only boyfriend of yours that I ever liked.’” She patted Backup’s head. “And I said, ‘Well, the only reason you liked him was because he fed you his people-food scraps all the time.’” Logan grinned into the dog’s fur.

“But no, no, Backup was adamant. ‘Seriously, Veronica. I miss him.’ To which I reasonably replied, ‘Yeah, Backup, I miss him too. Even though he didn’t feed me scraps.’”

Logan snorted.

“And then Backup had the most brilliant idea he’s ever had. Ever. Want to know what he said?”

Logan looked at her and nodded. His eyes felt tired, and he could feel moisture forming along their edges.

“He said, ‘I have an idea, V. Let’s go find him. We’ll tell him we miss him and we love him, and we’ll promise that we’ll never leave him ever again. What do you think?’ And I was like, ‘Backup, you are the smartest dog I have ever met. Either that or Echolls table scraps are far superior to Mars table scraps.’”

Logan stared into the sand as his heart beat soundly against his chest. Tears slid down his face easily and he watched as they made wet dots in the sand.

“ ‘Table scraps, schmable scraps,’ Backup said to me. ‘You know what I miss more than Logan, Veronica?’ ‘What do you miss more, Backup?’ I asked. ‘I miss you being happy. Now, let’s go get him.’”

Logan felt Veronica’s hand under his chin again, and he looked up at her, his lower lip quivering.

“So. We did. Here we are.” She sighed. “Logan, Backup misses you. He loves you. He promises never to leave you ever again.”

Logan coughed, pulling away from her slightly. “I miss Backup, too.”

“Logan?”

“Yeah, V.?”

“I miss you. I love you. I promise, if you want me, if you want me to come back, I will. And I promise I will never leave you ever again.”

Logan nodded quietly.

“You know what? Fuck that.”

Logan’s heart sank again. She had the uncanny ability to send him on a whirlwind of emotions. What now?

“Excuse me?” he asked, imperceptibly.

“Whether you want me to come back or not, I’m here. I’m not leaving. You will have to forcibly remove me to get away from you. I need you. And I think – I think you need me, too.”

He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time since she’d swum out to him in the water. Her ocean-blue eyes shone against newly-pink skin. Her hair hung around her face in a knotted mess, but the sun shone through the blonde locks, tinging them with warm gold. Her skin was goosepimpled and he saw her shiver under the light breeze which weaved between them. He looked out to his side and saw his towel bunched in a ball beside Dick’s head. He reached out and shook the towel free from sand. Reaching forward, he beckoned her to come close, and he wrapped the towel around her, rubbing her cold skin with it. She turned towards him and leaned against his chest. “Logan. Say something.”

“Well,” he sighed, trying to sound exasperated, “I guess I’m stuck with you…and your little dog, too.”

“You’re stuck with me?!” She gasped, trying to push away from him. “Well, fine then.”

“Not so fast, Mars.” He pulled her tight against his body. “I’m stuck with you. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She peered up at him with an uncertain glare behind her eyes. “I’m keeping you to your promise.”

He felt good, solid, for once. He felt complete. She said all the right things, and she felt so good…she felt and smelled like his Veronica. His heart beat resounded in his chest, and he felt alive again.

She snuggled against him silently. He was thankful to have her so close.

He spoke again. “I have a promise to make myself.”

“Oh?”

He bent to whisper in her ear. Her eyes grew wide. “Oh really?! 5 in an hour, huh? I don’t know…” She lifted her face and looked at him. Love brimmed from her pores, and he felt it embrace him.

“You see,” he said seductively, dropping his head towards hers. “it’s not a challenge." He brushed his lips against hers, and she opened her mouth at his bidding. He spoke furtively, into her mouth, against her tongue. "It’s a promise.”

Her tongue darted out over her lips and against his, and he hugged her tighter as she strained against his height. He happily drank her in, moving his mouth slowly and surely against hers, pulling her lower lip softly between his teeth, pressing his fingers against the soft slope of her neck. He could feel her swallow as she pressed her tongue along the length of his. She pushed in, then pulled out, and kissed him quickly on the lips before speaking.

“Well then,” she said, breathily. “We’d best get to it then." She tugged at his hand as they broke apart. She started walking quickly toward the parking lot, slapping her leg at Backup to follow. "We’ve got promises to keep, and stat!”

Logan laughed heartily and jogged to catch up to her. Placing an arm around her shoulder, he breathed a happy sigh. “Mars…Veronica…I love you.”

“I know, silly. I know.”

--

END

Lyrics: (some)

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel, of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway
She was with another man
But I won't lose any sleep on that, 'cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful,
You're beautiful,
You're beautiful, it's true.

I saw your face
In a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Fic: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 4 of ?, R (L/V/D, Logan POV, Dick)

Sun, 19 Mar 2006 22:41:44 GMT

Title: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 4 of 5
Author: Amanda (rubie_so_ho)
Rating: R
Word Count: 3,080
Characters: L/V/D (Logan POV)...and Dickw
Summary: Three is no longer company.
Spoilers: up to 2x13
Disclaimer: Oh Rob, you own them...lucky bastard!
A/N: I had to update! I'm addicted!

( Chapter One ), ( Chapter Two ), ( Chapter Three )

A few days had passed, and in the meantime, the atmosphere at the suite had not gotten any warmer. The air in the small space felt stagnate, and it was quiet and still at all times. Logan, Veronica and Duncan moved about the rooms like ghosts, their footsteps whispers against the floors. As far as Logan could tell, none of them were very game to talk or engage in any social activity; this unnerved him to no end, but he could not bring himself to leave the suite for the first couple days. He was possessed by deep-seated paranoia; he feared that if he left, he would miss something important. He didn’t dare miss a fleeting glance or escaped sigh emitted from Veronica in his direction. He remained, feet, inches away from a quiet Duncan and a fidgety Veronica.

He grew consumed by his own thoughts and curiosity. What had passed between he and Veronica comprised a constant and unending thought on loop in his mind. Details from that night - her scent, the way her eyes pleaded with him, the bewitching curve of her mouth, the heat that emanated from her, the wetness of her tongue against the corner of his mouth – lingered, toying with him. He lay awake at night, with visions of her inches from his face, licking that one drop of ice cream over and over again. His hands would curl into fists at his side as he fought the urge to touch himself during these lucid dreams.

He knew that Veronica had not spoken to Duncan about her changed feelings for him. He knew because Veronica and Duncan had not spoken about much at all, period, since Duncan’s outburst in the Xterra on their return from court days earlier. Duncan spent most of the day perched on the couch, watching television, sipping a beer. He occasionally interrupted his intense TV-watching schedule to silently play video games with an equally quiet Logan. They would sit there, the two best friends of yesteryear, while the mutual object of their affections sat across from them, curled up in a big leather armchair. She would read everything – books, magazines, 3 day-old newspapers from other cities – and Logan would periodically catch her peering over her reading material at them.

Every time Logan would lock eyes with Veronica, he would quickly and guiltily shift his gaze to Duncan, who had yet to catch one of these covert exchanges.

On the third morning, the three of them assembled haphazardly in the kitchen to eat breakfast. Logan, ever dutiful, cooked eggs while Duncan made coffee and Veronica attended to the rigorous task of toasting the bagels. Logan watched intently as she kept watch over the toaster, and she slid him a smoldering glance while Duncan’s back was turned to both of them. Logan’s heart leapt and a searing heat ripped through his lower abdomen. He wanted her so badly – he wanted to take her in his arms and spread her over the counter, to lavish kisses all over her freshly-scrubbed skin and to touch her in the places she’d whisper in his ear. Remorse overtook him, though, and he lowered his gaze from hers as his shoulders fell into a sorry slump.

After breakfast, after the dishes had been cleared, something finally got to Logan. He couldn’t take being in the suite hovering between, around, over Duncan and Veronica. He felt electricity snap within him, and hurriedly rushed to his room. He could feel Duncan and Veronica’s eyes on him in curiosity, but he uttered not a word. He changed quickly into his swim trunks and an old t-shirt. He slipped on his favorite flip-flops and grabbed his keys and sunglasses. He grabbed his cell phone off his nightstand and speed-dialed the only person he knew he could spend a mindless day with.

“Hey. Dick. Yeah. Let’s check out the surf.” He walked into the living room, and Veronica and Duncan continued to stare at him quietly. “Like – now. I’ll pick you up in 10. Yeah, I totally don’t care what hoochie is in your bed at the moment. We’ve got waves to catch. Okay.” He snapped his phone shut. “Yeah, hey…” he began, awkwardly. “I’m outtie. I’ll check you kids later.” It was the most any of them had said to each other in days beyond grunts of “pass the ketchup” or “hand me that magazine” or “want a beer?”

Duncan raised his hand in a farewell. “Tell Dickie I said hey. Tell him we’ll catch up soon.” Logan nodded to him, and allowed himself to look at Veronica ephemerally. She smiled softly, and muttered, “Yeah, have fun.” She then returned to her US Weekly, trying to look engrossed in the fashion do’s and don’ts of the week and failing miserably. Logan sighed and exited the room. He was excited to leave. He couldn’t take the silence or the tension any longer. His paranoia, fear, and guilt had intensified so much so that he felt as though he would implode if he remained with them for one second longer. Riding down in the elevator, a loud, long sigh escaped him and he felt a sense of relief. Nothing was solved, and surfing with Dick sure wasn’t going to disentangle the mess amongst the three of them, but he yearned to push those thoughts out of his head for at least a few hours.

Though he didn’t know what would happen upon his return.

He swung by Chez Casablancas to pick up his bleached-blond airheaded friend. They rode to the beach, music blaring from the yellow Xterra, the breeze blowing their hair through the open windows. The main beaches along the coast were mildly crowded, so Logan made the executive decision to travel further north to find a more secluded spot, one in which they could have yards and yards of surf to themselves.

After an hour of rigorous surfing, he and Dick plopped down on the sand next to each other, warming themselves under the hot June sun. They sat in silence for some time, which was a remarkable feat on Dick’s part. The usually effusive teen laid back on the sand while Logan sat pensively, his arms wrapped around his legs, his eyes squinting up into the sky and the lazily shifting clouds.

A few solid minutes passed when Logan finally spoke. “Duncan’s back.”

Dick sat straight up in a flash, as though a shot ran up his spine. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope. The baby’s not his. He was acquitted by the court,” Logan said easily, as though no backstory were required.

No backstory was necessarily required for Dick’s benefit – above all things, Dick was uncomplicated, and favored uncomplicated explanations. “Ah. I see.” He shuffled his feet in the sand and kicked a little at Logan’s bare feet. Logan simply continued to stare into the sky.

“So,” Dick began, “who the hell was Saint Meg banging?”

“You got me. Veronica wanted to figure it out, but Duncan told her to let it go.” He scratched the back of his head, feeling his still-damp hair between his fingers.

“Huh,” Dick muttered. “So…are they, like, back together? D and trailer trash?”

“Dick…” Logan began, warningly.

“Okay okay. She’s not trailer trash. She’s lovely, and you will never again hear me say otherwise.” He smirked.

“Ha. Right.” Logan peered over at him. “I’m not sure if they’re back together. Things are…weird.”

“I’ll say.” Dick shrugged. “Well, hey, I wanna see DK. It’d be great to catch up with him.” He got up quickly, brushing the sand off his board shorts. “Let’s go back to the suite.”

“Dude…” Logan looked up at him uneasily. “I don’t know if that’s the best idea right now. Like I said, things are weird back at the suite.”

“Aw, come on. I just wanna see good ol’ Duncan Donut. I’ll stop by, we’ll all have some beers, then I’ll take off. I got a hot date later on, anyway.” He wiggled his eyebrows at Logan.

“I don’t even want to know who your skank of the week is, Dickie.” Logan remained sitting in the sand as an unsettling feeling spread through his stomach. He was certain that bringing Dick back to the penthouse was not the brightest of ideas.

Though…maybe a little light-heartedness would relieve some tensions.

He amended his thoughts rapidly. No amount of Dick Casablancas would put Veronica Mars at ease.

As if he read Logan’s thoughts, Dick piped up, “Come on, dude. I’ll even be nice to Veronica.”

“I don’t know…” Logan hesitated.

“I promise.” Dick proffered his hand to help Logan up. Logan grabbed it and stood to face his friend.

“All right. But seriously, Dick – best behavior.”

“Scout’s honor, man.” Dick held up two fingers.

“Put those fingers away. I don’t know where they’ve been.”

“Only in your wildest fantasies could you even venture a guess.”

“Okay, ew. Let’s roll.” Logan pushed Dick forward, and the laughing duo piled into the Xterra.

***

Little over an hour later, they arrived at the Neptune Grand. They pulled on t-shirts and flip-flops and ambled into the elevator. Logan pressed the “PH” button and they rode up in silence.

He pulled his key card out of his t-shirt pocket and slipped it into the lock. The two boys tumbled into the room, tired but refreshed from their surf and the long drive back to Neptune. Logan rubbed a hand over his forehead in a lazy movement and peered around the main room of the suite.

The room was empty, and it was silent outside of the faint buzzing from the overhead light.

Logan deduced that Duncan and Veronica finally couldn’t take being inside any longer, and had escaped like he had. He plopped down on the couch next to Dick and felt as though this was a good idea on all of their parts. They needed to be out, and away from each other. He snapped on the TV and muttered to Dick that Duncan must be out. Dick nodded, and walked soundly over to the fridge to grab some beers. They simultaneously cracked their beers open and watched mindless entertainment on the tube.

A few minutes passed when Logan thought he heard mumbling voices. He strained to hear, looking around to find the source of the noise. As he peered around the room, he saw Veronica’s messenger bag propped against the base of the armchair next to him. He suddenly realized that Duncan and Veronica were in Duncan’s room, and the mumbling voices belonged to them.

What are they doing in there? the question gnawed away at him. He swallowed, trying hard to remind himself of Veronica’s words from the other night. She doesn’t love him anymore. She doesn’t. She can’t. Still, a creeping sense of dread rose up within him. But what is she doing in there?

He glanced over at Dick, who appeared unaware of the soft din of voices. He looked absorbed in the newest, stupid dating game on MTV. Logan remained quiet, and tried to ignore them. He willed himself to stop straining to make out words and the emotions behind the voices. Gulping his beer loudly, he attempted to fix his eyes on the screen, following Dick’s example.

Suddenly, the volume of their voices rose and it became painfully obvious that they were arguing.

Logan stared at the closed doors to Duncan’s room. He looked back at Dick, whose eyebrows were raised.

At first, their voices were still muffled and Logan couldn’t make out any distinct words. A stern, deep, male voice rambled in a hurried tone, followed by a lighter, feminine voice which sounded defensive and desperate.

“Maybe…we should leave,” Logan whispered to Dick as he stood up.

“No fucking way, man,” Dick responded in hushed tone. “This is just getting good.”

“Dick! For real, man, this isn’t any of our businesses.” Logan kicked Dick’s shin with his toe.

Dick crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. “There’s no way in hell I’m moving. I wanna hear a bitchfight.”

Logan sighed. “Fine.” He collapsed back on the couch, feeling guilty. He just wanted to leave, but he knew any efforts to get Dick to leave would be pointless.

The volume of the voices on the other side of the doors escalated again, and their words became more distinct.

“Please, Duncan,” Veronica said in a pleading tone. “Please don’t be like this. I need you to understand.”

“Understand what, Veronica?” Duncan prodded He sounded aggravated. “Understand that I came back here, for you, to be with you, and you won’t even let me touch you?!”

“Oooh. This is getting good.” Dick rubbed his hands together like a maniacal movie villain.

“We should so not be hearing this,” Logan moaned softly.

“Duncan, I…I just…I can’t,” Veronica whined. Logan pictured her. She wasn’t crying, but he could practically see the fear in her eyes. She was scared, and he just wanted to wrap her up in his arms and protect her. He balled his hands into fists and restrained himself from bursting into the bedroom. He knew that this was their fight, and it was a fight that had to have.

“God, do you know how worthless I feel, Veronica? All I want is to be with you, to make love to you, and you won’t even let me kiss you!”

“Heeee,” Dick uttered giddily.

Logan sank deeper into the couch cushions, his shoulders slumping. He rested his chin against his chest and sighed. He had wanted Veronica to tell Duncan the truth, to end the uncertainty and awkwardness. He didn’t want it to have to happen like this. The distressed anger in Duncan’s voice made him cower further into himself. As much as he wanted Veronica and Duncan apart, he didn’t want Duncan to hurt.

“Duncan. I’m sorry. I never meant for you to feel worthless. I love you. You’re one of my best friends. I don’t want you to hurt.” There was an evenness in Veronica’s voice; Logan could tell she was trying her hardest to keep it together.

“You don’t love me,” Duncan hissed.

“I do. I just…I can’t do this.” There was a short pause, and Dick winked at Logan in interim. Logan rolled his eyes in response. Veronica began again. “Duncan, I thought you were never coming back. At first, I clung onto the memory of us, and what we had, but…I began to move on. I had to. You were on the run.”

“But I’m back. And we…we were meant to be together.” Duncan’s voice resonated with hope and desperation.

“I don’t…I don’t think we were, Duncan.” Veronica said, with an air of resignation. She sounded tired.

Their discourse quickened in pace:

“How…how can you say that? I have been in love with you for years.”

“I was in love with you, Duncan. But we broke up, Lilly died, I was the town outcast…I changed.”

“So…are you saying you fell out of love with me?”

“I…Duncan, wait.” There was a pause, and Logan wondered what was transpiring. “Yes. I fell out of love with you.”

There was a bang against Duncan’s door, and Logan and Dick jumped simultaneously. Logan started, but he settled. Duncan would never physically hurt Veronica. He stilled himself, and continued to eavesdrop.

“You’re lying.” Duncan’s voice began to rise. “You…lying…”

“Duncan. Stop.” Veronica sounded stern. She wasn’t going to take his bullshit.

“What happened when I was gone, Veronica?” he demanded.

“What? What do you mean?”

“Did you sleep with him?”

“What? Who? Him who?”

“You know.”

“Duncan, I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

“Fuck! Yes you do.” Duncan sounded frustrated and annoyed. Logan leaned forward and put his head in his hands. He knew where Duncan was going with this.

“Dun…”

“You’re in love with him, aren’t you? You’re in love with him. Christ alive, FUCK! I should have fucking known this would happen the moment I left.” Logan could hear pacing feet on the other side of the doors.

“I honestly am confused. I don’t know…”

“Deny it,” Duncan cut her off. “I’d like to see you fucking deny it.”

“I…”

“Say it! Say it right now.” There was venom dripping off every word Duncan uttered. “Say, ‘Duncan, I am not in love with Logan Echolls.’”

Logan sucked in a long breath. Dick whistled low and quietly. Logan refused to look at him. He laid back on the couch, fidgety, and looked up at the ceiling.

“This is ridiculous, Duncan. I’m not putting up with this.” Soft footsteps sounded like they were approaching the door. Logan and Dick looked at each other.

“You’re not going anywhere until you deny it.”

“Duncan!”

“Say it. Say it. Goddamn it, Veronica! Just say it!”

A silent, solitary moment passed.

“I can’t.”

Logan drew his lower lip between his teeth and bit down, hard. He could taste salt from the ocean mixed with his blood. She loved him. He just wished she didn’t sound so melancholy when she admitted it. He sighed bitterly. This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to defend herself or her love for him. And she was supposed to tell him first.

A part of him wanted to jump up, slap Dick on the knee, and praise God all at once.

But he knew better. The revelation on the other side of those doors was going to have a fallout the size of Hiroshima.

It was quiet for a few minutes, and Logan was dying to know what was happening. He sat straight up, his eyes darting back and forth as his mind raced. For once, Dick was completely silent.

The door opened, and Logan and Dick sheepishly leaned back into the couch and stared straight ahead. Duncan was halfway through a sentence when he emerged. “…that’s just fine. I’m so fucking out of here.” He stopped in his tracks when he saw Logan and Dick, and Logan saw him freeze out of the corner of his eye.

“Fucking perfect,” Duncan spat.

Logan looked up at him and shook his head. Tears formed in the corner of his eyes. “No. Duncan, listen. No.”

“Save it. I could fucking care less.” Duncan walked to the door, brushing by them coldly.

“D! Where are you going, man?” Dick asked. Logan noticed Duncan carried his full duffle bag at his side.

Duncan didn’t turn. He paused. “Napa.” He then walked through the door, allowing it to slam behind him.

The sound of feet shuffling made Logan turn. Veronica stood in the doorway of Duncan’s room, her hand against the jamb. She looked stunned, but not sad. She looked tired, but not angry. There were no tears in her eyes, no tear track marks on her face.
She opened her mouth and no words came. A small sigh fell from her lips.

Logan stared back at her, his eyes searching her face for some kind of sign. He looked at her pleadingly, silently begging her to speak, to say anything.

She stood there dumbly. She didn’t move, didn’t speak…it seemed like she even ceased to breathe.

Logan wanted to throw his arms open, to gather her up against his chest, to feel her warmth against him…but he sat still. He was afraid of letting his guard down; he feared that if he welcomed her she would push him away like she did before.

Finally, Veronica opened her mouth to speak.

“I need to go. I need…I need to go home.” She rushed forward, avoiding his gaze, and picked up her bag. Before he could react, before he could reach out and touch her or beg her to stay, she was out the door.

No words passed between Logan and Dick. Without a word, Dick pushed a beer under Logan’s nose, and Logan lifted the bottle to his mouth, chugging the entire bottle without stopping.

--

TBC

Fic: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 3 of 5, R (L/V/D, Logan POV)

Wed, 15 Mar 2006 23:42:32 GMT

Title: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 3 of 5
Author: Amanda (rubie_so_ho)
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,514
Characters: L/V/D (Logan POV)
Summary: Logan's mission is accomplished.
Spoilers: up to 2x13
Disclaimer: Oh Rob, you own them...lucky bastard!
A/N: Still a whore for comments and I totally am guilty of acting for my readers. Hope this isn't too disappointing!

( Chapter One ), ( Chapter Two )

Logan returned hours later, and while it was only late afternoon and sunny outside, the inside of the suite was dark and cold like a tomb. He placed the plastic bag on the counter, pleased with himself at his find. He had completed his mission, and relished in his accomplishment. He contemplated putting it away, but instead reached into the drawer closest to him and pulled out a single, clean spoon. He opened the bag and pulled out the carton and set it on the cool surface of the counter, disposing of the bag quickly. He mulled over his decision, spoon in one hand, and his other hand hovering above the carton’s lid. He bit his lower lip. There were advantages to waiting and advantages to digging in now. He needed the comfort, but sensed there was someone else who needed it more. He turned, flicking the dim light over the stove on, and resumed his pensive position. He couldn’t resist. He popped the lid open with gusto, and poised the spoon over the edge of the carton.

At that moment, as if on cue, the door to Duncan’s room clicked open and a groggy-looking little blonde crept out into the muted light. She blinked several times, pulling her hand to cover a protracted, whiny yawn.

“Your timing,” he began, “is impeccable.”

“Hmm?” she garbled, stretching her arms above her head. “Whatdoyoumean?” She mumbled her words together like a tiny child just learning to speak.

Logan chuckled low and, placing his hand around the carton, lifted it to her view. He shook it in the air with zest.

Veronica blinked several more times, trying to rouse herself from what she thought was a dream. “No. Way.”

“Way, Mars. Like, totally.” Logan put on his best valley-girl voice.

“Rocky Road?”

“You bet, kid.” He grinned at her and wiggled his eyebrows.

“From the creamery?” She looked at him incredulously. She unwittingly licked her lips, and her eyes poured over in just-realized hunger.

“Mm-hmm.” Logan couldn’t help smiling like the Cheshire cat.

“My favorite!” Veronica squealed like a child and ran over to him. “Gimme gimme gimme!”

***

Logan and Veronica, on one bored, lazy night the last summer, had decided to go roaming about Neptune in Logan’s Xterra. As the night wore on, their boredom grew, and they ran out of places to check out. They both knew Neptune as though its map was tattooed on their respective forearms. Veronica bemoaned the fact that there was nothing interesting to see, nothing interesting to do. Logan intermittently nuzzled Veronica’s neck, whispering against her ear that there was something interesting they could do back at the mansion, but she playfully pushed him away each time and shook off his advances with a cunning smile. She wanted to stay out, to find an interesting nook or cranny that she’d never been aware of before. Upon her rebuffs he would sigh, not out of exasperation, but out of pure adoration for the quirky object of his affection and her constant desire to explore.

Finally, after hours of touring the same old hangouts, Logan spotted a tiny hut at the end of one of the ’Tune’s lesser-known drags. He squinted, and leaned forward to read the sign. “The Creamery?” He asked, to himself, to Veronica, to the air. She silently shrugged in return, and he pulled into the tiny dirt parking for a better look. “I think it’s an ice cream place.”

Veronica’s ears perked up at the words, and the next thing Logan knew, the tiny thing had jumped out of the car, pulling him quickly behind her. The girl loved to eat, and ice cream was her favorite refuge; this he knew. Whether she was sad, mad, frustrated, or even bored – this was her comfort food. “You have the fattiest security blanket of all-time,” he chanted in a sing-song tone. “Lucky for us both, I have the metabolism of a hummingbird!” she sang in return, grinning.

She promptly ordered Rocky Road for the both of them – “I could have totally ordered for myself, thankyouverymuch,” Logan intoned in a huff. “Hush, boy,” she shook her head at him. “You’ll thank me later.”

Upon slipping the first spoonful into her mouth, Veronica emitted a low, guttural moan. “This…is…the…best…ever.” Another spoonful crossed her lips. “Mmmmmmm.”

Logan giggled at her, and shook his head. “Girl, if this is the way you get over ice cream, I can just imagine how you get during…”

“Shh. Try it.” She silenced him, placing her finger over his lips. He attempted to nip at the finger before she quickly withdrew it, dipping it into her whipped cream and licking it with a flourish.

Although he was getting thoroughly aroused at watching her consume the ice cream – or rather, watching the ice cream consume her – with all her little moans and sighs, he lifted the plastic spoon to his mouth at her behest.

“Oh. My. God. This is fucking amazing.”

“I told you!” She exclaimed, her mouth half-full, shaking a finger at him.

“Like…wow. This is almost as good as sex.” He took another heaping bite.

“So sex is better? Hmm.” She furrowed her brow in mock-seriousness. “This makes me really want to have sex.” She licked her lips, avoiding eye contact.

Logan dropped his spoon and it clattered, plastic against plastic, on the table. He sat before her, mouth wide open. He closed it a moment, and then opened it again, but words never came.

She giggled loudly as she shoveled another bite into her mouth. Her laughs reverberated against her spoon as her eyes twinkled at her boyfriend.

“Okay, that’s it, we are so leaving…” he grabbed her hand from across the table, and she followed in abeyance, snatching the remainder of her ice cream, her laughs ringing out through the abandoned street as he dragged her to the Xterra.

***

Veronica ripped the spoon out of Logan’s hand and greedily dipped into the carton. Bringing it to her lips, she uttered a moan that rung out in Logan’s head in sweet remembrance. “Mmm…so good.”

“Hmph. You could have gotten your own spoon.”

“Hee.” Veronica ate another bite giddily.

As Logan watched Veronica eat bite after bite with a look of pure contentment gracing her face, he secretly commended himself for buying the ice cream. Part of him was wishing she would notice that he remembered her favorite, and that she would silently praise the sentiment. He wondered if she gave it only a fleeting thought or whether her mind settled upon it; whether she saw it for the significance he’d orchestrated. While he pondered this, a light lit within him – he realized she looked truly happy for the first time since Duncan had returned.

Is it because of the ice cream or is it because of me?

Veronica climbed atop the counter and coveted the carton, hugging it close to her body. “This is just what I needed.”

Logan drew in a long breath. “Yeah. That’s what I figured.” He fought back the onset of a dopey grin; he didn’t dare let on how pleased with himself he was.

She smiled, into the ice cream, her eyes tilted downward. “You always know what’s best for me.”

A silent moment passed and Logan convinced himself he could hear her heart beating against the darkness. He wasn’t sure how to respond to her statement, so he chose a different course. “So…Duncan’s back. It’s…”

“Weird. Awkward. Crazy.” She finished his sentence with just a few qualifiers that had come to his mind.

“Yeah,” he said simply, agreeing with a nod. “I’m sorry I didn’t…”

“No. I understand,” she said. “I shouldn’t have launched into that whole litany in the car earlier. It’s just the P.I.’s daughter in me. I couldn’t help it.” She sighed. “Once a Mars, always a Mars.”

“He shouldn’t have yelled. And I shouldn’t have let him, but…”

“But, he just came back. And, you don’t want to fight with him… and, he was partly right. Right?” She spooned another bite heaping with melting whipped cream into her mouth, licking both sides of the spoon clean.

He sighed loudly. “I wouldn’t say he was right to yell. But, yeah…maybe it wasn’t the best time to vocally begin your crusade to find Lilly’s…” he coughed, choking on the name, “father.”

Veronica nodded matter-of-factly. Logan dipped his spoon into the ice cream carton she still held like a stuffed animal to her body. She shot him a death-look over the sizeable scoop he took and he shook his head and laughed softly. “Hey, you have to learn how to share, little girl.”

“It was weird,” she changed the subject. “When I woke up from my nap, he was next to me. It was…so awkward.”

He swallowed slowly, amazed that she was confessing this tidbit to him. He wondered what suddenly made her so open where she was once a closed book. She was effusive, and her eyes shone with eagerness to tell him all. He took advantage of this situation.

“Why was it so…weird? I mean, you guys never actually broke up before he left. It was all a show.” This he had deduced on his own. He knew Donut would never have slept with Kendall, no matter the production that occurred in the suite the couple days prior to Duncan’s disappearance. Later, he figured out how all the pieces of the puzzle fit together. Duncan and Veronica had played him and everyone else. He was mad about it, for a time, but the quest for his own freedom consumed him so much so that he let it go.

Veronica nodded in response. “I know. But…you have to understand, Logan. I thought he was never coming back. Ever. I thought I would never see him again for the rest of my life.” She hung her head, staring at the melting ice cream in the carton cradled in her arms. “I was resigned to the fact. I started to move on.”

“Then…” the question was just building up within him, wanting to spew forth. “Why did you just go lie down in his bed?” A touch of bitterness tinged his words, and to avoid looking at her, he scooped more ice cream into his mouth, closing his eyes in pleasure and fright, letting it melt over his tongue and slide down the back of his throat slowly.
If she thought he was jealous, it didn’t show on her face.

She began cautiously, but in earnest, “Well… I thought it was the right thing to do. He thinks… I’m in love with him. He believes… that we’re going to pick up where we left off, that we’ll be together forever. I – I just can’t – crush him.”

Logan nodded in understanding. She couldn’t let Duncan down.

“I love him,” she began, and Logan swallowed hard, fighting the urge to scream or cry. “but…I don’t think…I’m in love with him…anymore.” The words poured out of her in a slow, drawling succession, as though she were fighting herself to say them.

Logan felt a surge of excitement, a sense of elation, build within him. His heart hoped and his mind prayed. These were words he had wanted to hear for months. He restrained himself from becoming overly exultant, however. Just because she’s fallen out of love with him doesn’t mean she’s in love with me.

He chuckled inwardly at the thought. Poor Veronica was like a ping-pong ball, passed between him and Duncan. His heart sank a little when he thought about it. He feared she had tired of the game, that she would want nothing to do with either of them. Maybe she just wanted to escape them both and move onto greener pastures – or at least more normal, adjusted young men.

He nodded to her, giving her a signal that he’d processed her statements. They sat and stood there in silence, looking at their hands, the floor, the ice cream, the counter – anything not to look at one another. The ice cream was near its end, and he pushed in, wanting to get a last few tastes before Veronica officially made the carton her bitch. He licked his spoon with glee, savoring the rich-tasting substance against his tongue. Veronica looked up at that moment and laughed at him.

“What? What’s so funny, Nancy Drew?”

“You’ve – you’ve got a little…” she motioned to the right corner of her own mouth. “Schmutz.”

“Ah.” He wiped at the left corner of his mouth with his fingers, mirroring her action.

“No, no. C’mere.” She motioned with her hand for him to move closer to her. Without a conscious thought as to what he was doing, he moved forward, nudging between her open legs on the counter. “Hmm?” he mumbled, asking where the ‘schmutz’ was.

Veronica began to lift her finger to point, but dropped her hand suddenly to her side. “It’s…” her eyes darted back and forth across his face, and her lips fell partially open in a gape. Logan raised his eyebrows curiously at her, and before he could open his mouth to speak, she leaned forward without hesitation and licked the right corner of his mouth.

She hovered there for a moment, mere centimeters from his face, and Logan froze. Feeling her warm breath against his skin, he closed his eyes and contemplated his next movement. He felt unadulterated need to envelop her entirely, to overtake her mouth with his, to touch the hollow of her neck, to press up against her, to feel her breasts against his chest and her ass under his hand. He wanted and needed to weave his hands through her slightly-tangled hair and to place kisses along her eyebrows. His hunger for her had never died, and he wanted so badly to sate himself.

But he was a prisoner to his newly-found conscience.

He pulled away quickly and leaned against the opposite counter. A sharp breath escaped him as he stared at her, his lips partially open, his mouth watering for the taste of her. He expected her to look surprised with herself, expected her expression to mirror that which she had months ago at the Camelot – that of, ‘why did I just do that?’

Veronica failed him in that regard. Her eyes were drenched with hope, her lips quivering with eagerness. Logan knew this look.

“…I don’t have to feel guilty anymore.”

“Guilty about what?”

It was that look that had made him kiss her for the second time, outside his house after his father had just beaten the shit out of Trina’s scumbag boyfriend of the week.

Her hope gave him hope, and he moved forward, determined to retrace his steps.

And then Duncan’s door clicked open softly again, leaving Logan in limbo, standing mere feet away from her with his arms hanging akimbo at his sides.

“Hey guys. Eating ice cream?”

Veronica nodded and handed the carton to Duncan, who stood comfortably between them, blissfully unaware of the bittersweet look which passed between his girlfriend and best friend.

--

TBC

Fic: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 2 of ?, PG-13 (L/V/D, Logan POV)

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 03:52:32 GMT

Title: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 2 of ?
Author: Amanda (rubie_so_ho)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,375
Characters: L/V/D (Logan POV), mentions of Lamb, Weevil, Etc.
Summary: The threesome go to court and Logan comments on their interaction
Spoilers: up to 2x13
Disclaimer: Oh Rob, you own them...so envious!
A/N: So I'm a whore for comments, obviously, or I wouldn't have updated so fast! ;-)

( Chapter One )

The next morning Logan roused himself at 7 a.m. for Duncan’s trial date. He wasn’t really sure why Duncan wanted him there, but he supposed that he wanted all the support he could get. His rigid, unfeeling parents weren’t coming down from Napa – not that this surprised anyone. Logan felt a sort of camaraderie with Duncan over their parents. During both of their childhoods, their respective parental units had been largely absent – Aaron and Lynn moviemaking, Jake developing up-and-coming computer technology, and Celeste being – well, Celeste. He knew he had the worse deal – his mother committed suicide and his father was a philandering, statutory raping murderer… but he didn’t envy the Kane children at any point for their prizes of parents.

So he readied himself, knowing he had to be there for his so-called best friend. They hadn’t been there for each other much in the past few years, but maybe it was a fresh beginning. Though Logan doubted it. He knew there were roadblocks to their friendship, roadblocks that would likely never go away. One was Lilly’s death, and his father’s part in it. The other was more prevalent, more blazingly present; the permanent barrier to their prior status. Things hadn’t been ‘normal’ between them in years, and he was painfully aware that no matter what support he offered, they could never be repaired. He simply saw his current attempt to support his friend as a band-aid that would at least cover the wound. Since no remedy could actually heal it, together they could simply put forth the image of recovery.

He waited out in the living room, eating an apple for his breakfast, until Duncan came out, looking sharp in a new suit. Logan knew that it was a recent purchase because it fit Duncan’s now-more-angular build to a T. He watched as Duncan ran his hands over the already-smooth lines of the suit, an act of idiosyncrasy rather than that of genuine grooming. He saw that Duncan was paranoid – even though he’d insisted this hearing was a mere formality. As Duncan fussed over himself, Logan began to see that he was a sheer shadow of his formal self; physically, he was smaller than the coarse, stocky, athletic boy which once held his own in fights with Logan. He saw a different person mentally before him as well. Duncan twitched where he was once calm, and he was unsure where he was once confident. Logan noted to himself that they all had changed. But what was the fallout to be?

They silently greeted each other and headed down to the parking garage. Once in the car on the way to Veronica’s, they let the radio’s music fill the void between them. Occasionally, Logan would peer out the side window and comment on the beautiful weather. Not that this was news – they lived in Southern California, and it was late spring. Every so often, Duncan would mention that the song on the radio was one of his favorites. Not that this was news – Logan knew his favorite songs and movies inside and out. There was simple, quiet small talk and an avoidance of anything else. There was so much more to talk about, but neither dared utter a syllable about it.

Logan pulled into the parking lot of Veronica’s building and Duncan promptly hopped out to get her. He was stopped abruptly in his tracks as she rounded the corner, anticipating their movements. He kissed her lightly on her temple and she viewed him with some warmth. Logan noticed that her behavior was a slight upgrade from the previous afternoon.

She’s had time to simmer in her own thoughts, he mused, and she’s realized what she’s been missing. Maybe now she’ll act like she at least likes the guy..

She hopped in the backseat and muttered a “hi” to Logan. He tipped an invisible chauffeur’s hat to her and he caught her broad smile in his rearview mirror.

Sometimes he wondered why he put forth all his little quirks for her to see – and a part of him was glaringly aware that many of his actions comprised a show, flashing bulbs and novelties to catch her attention, to make her laugh, to remind her how charming he was. Half of him laughed inwardly at the thought, and another part of him shuddered. He found it funny that he would tumble over backwards for the tiny blonde, but also thought it to be pitiful and shameful all at once.

Is it amusing, that I’m her jester, or is it a sad state of affairs? Am I attractive, or am I pathetic?

He pushed the thoughts out of his head and listened to Veronica and Duncan discuss how the hearing would progress. Duncan explained that the DA would likely take him in pre-hearing conference to discuss a deal of some kind, a deal that the judge would likely be privy to. He would probably discuss with his lawyer a bit, and then all the little players would come to the courtroom to see his fate played out. Veronica asked little questions here and there – most of which Logan found pretty banal. He supposed she was just trying to show Duncan that she was interested. He wondered if she was sincere, or if she was a mere player in this game, just like he and Duncan were.

Our stage has been set, and we’re just reading our lines, going through these motions… who even remembers what is real and what isn’t?

Logan parked outside the Balboa County Courthouse and each of them exited the car. Logan hung back a little to allow Duncan to lead the way, and watched as Duncan proffered his hand for Veronica to hold. She reached forward, tentatively, her eyes dark with effort and trying. Logan saw that she wasn’t quite comfortable, at least not yet, and that she was failing at her acting attempts. Whether Duncan noticed, he wasn’t sure. Duncan’s stare was blank, which made Logan wonder what meds he was on now. Was it the meds? Or was it a forced ignorance toward Veronica’s hesitancy?

As they walked up the courthouse steps, Veronica peered back at Logan surreptitiously. Duncan was looking straight ahead with determination, and didn’t notice her eyes’ indiscretion. She looked scared and hopeful all in one look, and Logan simply stared back at her blankly. He didn’t know how to take her, not now. Things had been easy just days ago, comfortable even. They had been getting along – the best they knew how, anyway – she had saved his ass, and they had celebrated with Weevil when Logan’s name was cleared and Felix’s murderer was hauled in. They had regained footing in their friendship. The evil bantering had evaporated, and had been replaced with playful barbs and exaggerated slaps to the shoulders. They had learned how to laugh again, and he had sensed they had discovered how to enjoy one another’s company again. It had felt like the billionth time they’d rehabilitated their relationship of sorts, but it felt more permanent than the last time. And this time, there hadn’t even been secret, stolen kisses or covert rendezvous.

He tried to tell himself that that was all right – they didn’t need to be about that. He reminded himself he was happy to be her friend again. Nothing more, nothing less…right?

But at that very moment, he wished he could see behind her furtive glances and silent messages. What is going on in your pretty little head, Mars? Why the cold shoulder to dear ol’ Donut?

He shook his head and forgot these thoughts as they entered the courthouse.

***

When they exited two hours later, Duncan was a completely free man. Lamb had lived up to his promises for once, to everyone’s amazement. He had arrested Mr. Manning the previous night, and Meg’s Aunt Kris and Veronica had forwarded all their incriminating evidence to the Sheriff’s office. Lamb had furthermore told the judge what he had seen at the Manning residence the night Duncan and Veronica had broken in. Duncan had been permitted to tell the judge in chambers his side of the story – why he felt he’d had to save Lilly from any sort of abuse or peril; how he’d panicked when his name wasn’t put on the birth certificate; how his parents initially refused to back his custody battle. He admitted his wrongs but thought he had to do what was best for the little girl he had thought in earnest was his.

The DA and judge were sympathetic, and the feds wanted to wash their hands of the matter. The case was quietly dismissed, and somehow the press had not gotten wind of the Return of the Kane.

When they left the courthouse, it was quiet in Neptune, and a peaceful calm settled amongst the three of them. They piled into Logan’s car and began the hushed sojourn back to the hotel.

Halfway there, Duncan spoke, leaping out of a trance. “I miss her. I really loved her, you know. I still love her. I wished she were mine. She was – she is – a wonderful baby.”

Veronica and Logan answered his statement with silence. Many moments passed, and Veronica finally piped up, “We need to find out who her father is.”

“What?” Duncan said, slowly, as if he didn’t hear her.

“Her father. You know, it will be difficult, but I bet I can do it. Of course, it’ll take a lot of work.” She spoke hurriedly, with excitement rising in her voice. “Do you still have Meg’s computer? Maybe we can get some info, if she had an online diary, or through some of her e-mails…”

“Veronica,” Duncan cut her off. “Stop.”

“What? I mean, it will be hard, but we’ll have like, the whole summer to figure it out…let’s see…”

“VERONICA. STOP IT,” Duncan shouted, a hush fell over the car. Logan noticed Duncan’s hands clenched into tight fists at his sides. Duncan looked forward; he refused to look back at her. He was furious, and it was pouring through his every pore. His eyes look clouded over and crazed, and when he spoke, the words traveled from between his teeth in a hiss.

“But, Duncan…” she began. Logan winced, and knew she was only hurting herself. He willed her to shut the hell up, to just stop. She was lighting a flame in Duncan that would only lead to a pyromaniac’s wet dream. He wanted to stop the car, turn around, and shake her; but he just drove. He stared straight ahead, not looking in the mirror at her, not looking to his side at Duncan.

Duncan’s temper burst as the flame grew within him. “YOU listen to ME. You are not going to sleuth your way through this. This is none of your business. This is none of MY business anymore either. We will honor Lilly, and her poor, dead mother, by letting this go.”

Logan glanced up in his mirror. Veronica uncharacteristically cowered in her seat as tears formed in the corners of her eyes. She opened her mouth in protest and Logan rolled his eyes. Just stop, stop now.

Duncan didn’t even see her action, but he anticipated it. “No. There are no more words about this. You will drop this, Veronica. Your PI skills are not needed - nor wanted - in this matter.”

Logan dared to peek into his mirror. Veronica sat there, dumbfounded, looking like a wounded animal. Her mouth hung open in a silent ‘O,’ and tear after tear fell from the corners of her eyes. The dam hadn’t broken, per se, but there was a sizeable leak just waiting to burst. She didn’t return his glance in the mirror. He wondered if he should ask if she wanted to go home, rather than back with them to the hotel. He sat on his words, however, and continued to drive in silence.

She followed them meekly up to the penthouse, standing betwixt them in the elevator. She was so quiet Logan couldn’t even hear her breathe when he strained to do so. He watched the rise and fall of her chest to reassure himself that she was still with them, and not a zombie, haunting the very space between he and his best friend. Her tears had dried up, and her mouth bucked shut. He wanted to reach out, touch her, shake her. He wanted to shake her and demand why her constant desire to solve the mystery of the week had to ruin a perfectly fine moment. He wanted to shake her and ask her why she was treating Duncan like she was. But mostly, he wanted to pull her tiny frame into his arms and stroke her hair and coo in her ear, telling her everything was okay, that no matter what she said, no matter what Duncan said, he was there for her and he wasn’t going away. He wanted to press kisses into her hair and rock her back and forth.

He wished there wasn’t this creeping sense of dread settling amongst the three of them.

He wished the silence that hung in the air would shatter into a million splinters.

A part of him wished Duncan had never returned.

They tumbled out of the elevator, and stood in the living room, all unsure of what to do next. Veronica spoke first, with a tiredness in her voice. “I need to lie down.” It was almost noon, but Logan felt sapped of all his energy, and his two cohorts looked like he felt. It was like a simulated night had fallen, and it was everyone’s bedtime.

He and Duncan watched after her as she traveled into Duncan’s bedroom and flopped herself onto the bed with a loud ‘thud.’ Logan saw Duncan swallow a lump in his throat and observed as he cautiously followed her into his room, shutting the door soundly behind him. Logan didn’t dare wonder what would go on behind those doors…though he guessed it wasn’t emotive makeup sex. He padded to his room and stared at his own, empty, bed.

Then, whirling on his toes, he marched through the suite and out the front door, on a mission.

--

TBC

Title: In a Crowded Place, R, Chapter 1 of ? (L/V/D, Logan POV)

Sat, 11 Mar 2006 20:35:33 GMT

Title: In a Crowded Place, Chapter 1 of ?
Author: Amanda
Rating: R (language)
Word Count: 2,390
Characters: Logan/Veronica/Duncan, Logan POV
Summary: Duncan returns.
Spoilers: up to 2x13
Disclaimer: All Rob’s!

A/N: Wanted to explore the possibility that Duncan may not be baby Lilly’s father…

Logan propped his feet up lazily on the coffee table in his suite and settled into the comfy leather sofa to begin his planned afternoon of rigorous PS2 playing. He leaned his head back with a content sigh. High school was over, and had been for almost 72 hours. He’d just recovered from two nights of senseless partying and hazy memories.

He took a large, satisfying gulp of water he’d poured to begin his day-long process of rehydrating himself. Never had water tasted so good as to his parched throat.

He’d silenced his phone and shut off his computer. He relished this calm, quiet alone time. He just wanted to veg.

Twenty or so minutes into his lackadaisical game-playing, he heard the faint sound of a key in the door. Looking down at his watch, he grew confused.

Four p.m.? The maid comes at 10. Kendall gave back her key…Who…?

“Hey. I’m here. Not late, right. You said 4. I’m here, 4, on the nose.” A flustered, flushed, out-of-breath Veronica Mars burst into the room. She threw her ever-present, ugly messenger bag on the chair and followed it, sinking into the cushions with a sigh.

Logan sat there, motionless, trying to recall asking the petite blonde to meet him.

I mean, I know I was drunk, but I don’t ever remember seeing her at any of the parties. Oh dude, if I even drunk-dialed her…

“You know, the note you slipped under the door of my apartment?” She said, urging him to recall. “Here.” She flipped through her ugly - God, I hate that bag - bag open and rummaged around, mumbling to herself. Finally, she pulled out a wrinkled piece of notepaper and handed it to him. He stretched out to grab it – this was more than he’d been planning to move all day, and he harrumphed to himself. He stared, stunned, at the note, which read simply, “Meet me at the penthouse at four p.m., Monday afternoon.” There was no signature.

“You got me. Nice to see you though. Hello, how are ya, all that good stuff…”

“Yeah…hi.” Her face twisted in confusion. “You mean you didn’t send this?”

“V. If I needed to talk to you, I’d call or text you.”

“Hmm. Maybe it was Weevil,” she said, absently.

“Uh,” Logan began, scratching his head. “I doubt it, but you can try.” Weevil-appearances had been scarce since Felix’s killer had been put away. He’d been busy rebuilding the PCHers and working to save up for a new bike.

Veronica snapped her Sidekick open to dial Weevil before Logan could say another word, and Logan un-paused his game. Every so often he would peer up to watch Veronica fiddle with the ends of her hair, or roll her eyes at what he presumed were unanswered rings. He was so preoccupied that he didn’t even hear the door click open again.

He became engrossed in his game again while Veronica left Weevil a lengthy, prattling message. As she hung up, he looked up again, opening his mouth to speak. Instead, he froze at the sight before him, and dropped his controller.

Veronica’s voice rattled in his ears, but he barely heard her. “What. Logan. What is…?” He faintly saw her turn to see what caught his attention, and she froze as well, as if suspended, shell-shocked.

“Hey guys. Miss me?”

Before them, duffle-bag in hand, looking slightly tanner and much thinner, stood Duncan Kane.

Neither Logan nor Veronica was able to move or speak.

“Well, I guess you’re surprised to see me…judging from your reactions…or, lack thereof,” Duncan started, chuckling low and uneasily.

“Duncan – you’ll – you’ll get caught. Where’s the baby? Is she safe? Who knows you’re here? Did anyone see you? Do your parents know you’re here? Duncan, this is dangerous…they’ll arrest you…” Veronica ranted on maniacally, her hands waving frantically in the air as she looked around her, cautious and edgy like a caged animal. It were as though she were looking to find Agent Morris and Lamb ready to shackle Duncan and drag him away.

Logan watched her in utter amazement, and periodically stared at Duncan. “Dude…dude,” he muttered, in repeated mantra.

Duncan didn’t seem fazed, and laughed at them, which pissed Logan off a little. He wondered how Duncan could act so flippant. That’s not you, that’s me. You’re the dependable one.

“Veronica. Logan. Seriously. Veronica, settle down. Calm down.” He placed a hand on her shoulder, and Logan swore he saw her shudder in response. What the...?

“Listen,” Duncan intoned, calmly. “Everything’s okay. No one’s ‘after me,’” he claimed, using air quotes, “anymore.”

Veronica and Logan paused their respective idiosyncratic behaviors at once, as though they were mechanical figures on a cuckoo clock. “WHAT?!” they shouted, in perfect harmony.

“Guys! Just – let me tell you, all right?”

Both nodded, marionettes on Duncan’s string, allowing him to continue. He remained standing, and began, calmly as ever, “Lilly,” The baby’s name is Lilly? That is uber-strange, Logan thought. “Lilly and I were in Cuba. We’d been there for a few days when she got really really sick.”

A look of maternal concern passed over Veronica’s face, and Logan felt something stir inside of him in response. Duncan shook his head, indicating he’d explain.

“The doctors said she needed a blood transfusion – she was severely anemic. So, as her father, of course, I offered my blood. When they typed me, they found I have a rare blood type – and that no matter what Meg’s type had been, our two types would never produce Lilly’s.”

Veronica shook her head in confusion, but Logan understood, perfectly. No fucking way.

“I’m not Lilly’s father.”

Logan drew in a long, haggard breath as he watched Veronica react to this. She looked as though someone punched her in the face, and it wasn’t a happy look. He thought she would be pleased. Clearly, from the look on Duncan’s face, he had thought so too.

Duncan continued rambling nonetheless, appearing to want to shake off Veronica’s silence.

“So. Um. Luckily, we found the right blood for Lill in Cuba. While she recuperated, I called Celeste and Jake, their lawyers, and Meg’s Aunt Kris. I told Kris that if she were willing to fight for custody of Lilly, I would give her all the evidence of Grace’s abuse. She agreed. I called Sheriff Lamb…”

“You did?” Veronica managed to croak.

“Yeah. I asked him to share with Kris the details of the night we broke into the Mannings’. I told him that if he complied, I’d turn myself in.”

Wow. Never knew DK had the cojones. Logan remained quiet.

“So I came back a few days ago, and by that time the Sheriff’s office had convinced the court to give temporary custody to Kris until the custody hearing.

I’m not very worried, though, because Lamb plans to arrest Mr. Manning for abuse this afternoon.”

Duncan paused, smiling at Veronica and Logan. Logan was amazed at what Duncan had managed to do, and Veronica’s facial expression echoed his thoughts.

You never knew he had it in him, either. You’d settled for a wimp, now you’re shocked and dismayed when he turns out to be a champ?

“I met with Lamb and the feds,” Duncan continued, unhindered. “The Mannings insisted on pressing charges, but when they learned of the abuse and the circumstances surrounding Meg’s pregnancy and all of it, the feds and cops backed off – a little. I still have to go to a hearing, but the feds told me they’re going to meet with the prosecutor and judge to work a deal out. Kane Software attorneys are meeting with them as well.”

Logan finally spoke. “That’s…that’s great, D. I’m glad you’re home. I’m glad you’re okay.” He said so genuinely, though he was still stunned at the situation.

“Thanks, Logan. I hear congrats are in order for you, too. Cleared your name, Lamb told me?”

“More like Veronica and Weevil cleared my name, but, yeah.”

“…and…Weevil?!”

“Long story.” Logan smiled shortly to his best - best? - friend. “We’ll have to – um – catch up.”

“You – you’re back? For good?” Veronica asked meekly, mumbling just above a whisper. She still looked like she’d gone a couple rounds in the ring. Logan noticed that she persisted in avoiding Duncan’s gaze. What is her problem? He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

“Veronica. Honey. I’m back. For good.” Duncan looked lovingly at her, and stroked the side of her face. Logan watched, feeling out of place, and Veronica then finally peered up at Duncan, and tears poured out of her eyes in quick succession. Duncan rapidly swept her up in his arms and spun her around.

From over his friend’s shoulder, Logan caught sight of her face, and she lifted her eyes to make contact with his. Veronica’s look was unmistakable – she looked at Logan with uncertainty and a hint of sorrow, her brow crinkled and her lower lip caught between her teeth. She clutched onto Duncan’s back and opened her mouth, as if to mouth something to Logan.

At that moment, Duncan set her down and turned to Logan, arms outstretched. “Dude. So good to see you.” He wrapped his arms around Logan and hugged him firmly.

Logan returned the hug and the sentiment, all the while observing Veronica. She hung back, staring at the floor. He grew very quiet and nervous at her behavior. She was holding something back, and he couldn’t put his finger on what.

“But. Duncan…” Veronica piped up, suddenly. Logan saw the wheels turning in her head.

“Hmm?” Duncan turned to look at her. Logan had a clear view of both of them – Duncan staring after her with adoration in his eyes, and Veronica, shuffling her feet around biting her lower lip.

Unbalanced much? Logan felt caught in some weird alternative universe where black was white and up was down. This wasn’t the way things were supposed to be. He loves her, she loves him. Right? Isn’t the world ordered so that they’re together 4-eva? He rolled his eyes at his own thought, but it was a thought that most of Neptune, himself once included, subscribed to: Veronica Mars + Duncan Kane = teddy bears and sunshine.

The words of a sassier, brasher blonde echoed in his thoughts. “Donut and V. will both go to Harvard, they’ll get married, precious baby brother will run for public office, and V. will pop out two and a half kids. End of story. Snore!"

Of course, he didn’t want to subscribe to this theory – this was a reality that trumped his peers’ idealism in love and fairytales. But his version of the story never garnered much acceptance; it just remained a dusty book on some back shelf.

That’s me. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Never able to escape being his father’s shadow, he was used to being the afterthought. Or never-thought.

Logan snapped back to attention when Veronica continued her thought. “Duncan, who is Lilly’s father?”

Ever the sleuth. Heh.

Logan raised his eyebrows curiously at Duncan as well. Duncan shrugged believably. “I don’t – no one does, really – know.”

“But you were definitely ‘with’ Meg?”

Logan shifted in his shoes. Dude, what a homecoming. ‘Hi honey, how are you, remind me, you did have sex with that other girl, right?’ He glared at Veronica, trying to permeate her words, trying to figure out why she was approaching the situation this way. Where are the teddy bears and sunshine? Color me confu-sed.

“Yes, Veronica,” Duncan replied, tersely. He finally, Logan took note, was getting annoyed with her attitude. “But Lilly is not mine. There is no evidence – right now – of who the father is. If you forgot, our prime source of information is inconveniently gone.”

Ouch.

“I’m sorry,” she replied, looking like a wounded animal, nudging the corner of the sofa with her toe. “I just thought maybe you had an idea.”

“Yeah. No. No clue.” Duncan crossed his arms and stared at the floor.

Logan stood between them still. Awkward, much? “Well. I think it’s one of those ‘am-scray’ times. Damn, that Beginner’s Guide finally paid off!” He grabbed his keys from off the coffee table and moved toward the door.

Duncan said, “Ok, Loge. See ya,” at the same exact moment that Veronica intoned, “You don’t have to leave, Logan.” They looked at each other ineptly. Logan moved to speak, and Veronica cut him off. “I have to leave anyway. I’m meeting my dad about college stuff. Urgent.”

Duncan looked hurt, his lower lip pouting out a bit. God, he’s the poster-child for pitiful sometimes.

“Oh! Wait!” He began, propelling Veronica to spin on her heel to face the both of them.

“Hmm?” She said, impatiently.

“I have a hearing tomorrow. I was hoping you – both…” He looked between Veronica and Logan “would be there with me. It would mean a lot.”

Veronica nodded slowly. “Sure. What time?”

“9 am sharp.”

“I’ll meet you there,” she said, as Duncan simultaneously proclaimed, “I’ll pick you up!”

“I’ll drive everyone,” Logan said, sighing. He was growing annoyed with this strange welcome-home shitfest. Duncan was back, and no one – neither him nor Veronica – could get very excited about it.

They nodded to him, and Veronica backed up toward the door. On a flight of bad timing, Duncan lunged forward and kissed her on the lips. She responded, but pulled back, looking a little startled. Licking her lips, she smiled softly and walked toward the door. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow. I’ll call you…” she looked at Duncan, “later.” Her lips formed a thin line. She put her hand on the door handle and peered sideways at Logan.

They shared a look that escaped Duncan. She stood there for a long second, as if trying to send telepathic waves to him. Logan furrowed his brow at her, and with that, she turned the handle and walked out, the door clicking softly behind her.

Logan and Duncan smiled uneasily at each other, and then Duncan quietly excused himself to his room, saying he was tired from the past week’s excitement. Logan waved him off, and plopped back on the couch, feeling more alone than he had before Duncan’s return.

TBC

Fic: Need Her, R (Logan POV, Veronica)

Thu, 09 Mar 2006 17:18:02 GMT

Title: Need Her
Author: Amanda
Rating: R
Word Count: 3,585
Characters: Logan POV, Logan/Veronica
Summary: Logan's been exonerated. He faces the fact that he and Veronica might not mean anything to each other anymore.
Disclaimer: All hail to Rob, who owns them all!
A/N: I had trouble with this, but I really wanted to explore how Logan would feel after his named got cleared - he would have to face the fact that after the fallout, he and Veronica might not need each other anymore.

Let me know what you think!

This beer is probably the best-tasting beer on earth. It’s the beer of champions. The beer that’s a promise of a new day. The beer of freedom.

He takes the last few gulps and throws the can into a large trash can in the corner.

“Beer me, Dick. Por favor.”

Dick smirks and tosses him a cold one. He pops it open in a flash and takes an inaugural gulp.

“Si. Gracias.”

“De nada, dude. Or something,” Dick mutters, barely paying attention. His eyes are full of all the “hot ass” prancing about tonight. Or so he’s stated every two minutes or so.

Logan lost count about 57 instances ago.

He himself doesn’t care much about the tappable ass in sight. All he cares about is sweet freedom and redemption…and getting fucked up to celebrate. Ah, the joys of being an 09-er without a care in the world. Well, at least for the time being.

“I thought you were bringing Miss Training Bra to my righteous shindig, dude,” Dick mumbled, still not looking at Logan, but examining asses and breasts as they glided past him.

“Miss Training Bra – as you so eloquently put it – is out. She’s done. In the can. Yesterday’s news.” He gulped, as happy as a – tipsy – clam.

“Moving onto an A cup, dude?” Dick put his hand on Logan’s shoulder, and stifles a faked sob. “I’m so…so proud. Little Logan’s…all grown up.” He bit his fist. “I’m getting verklempt.”

Logan smacked Dick on the back of the head swiftly, but chuckled. “After journeying to silicone valley - courtesy of your stepmom, of course – I had to start back at square one, au naturel.”

“Dude. You’d seriously go for itty bitty titties over Kendall’s?” Dick licked his lips lasciviously. “Fake or not…”

Logan shot his hand out in the air. “Don’t finish that sentence. You’re going to go to hell.”

“True dat. And as long as the streets of heaven are paved in beautiful, buoyant boobs,” Dick breathed, looking out into the fake horizon, “I need to be a very good boy on earth.”

Logan rolled his eyes at his sex-fiend of a friend. He vaguely remembers having more interesting conversations with his now-absent best friend.

Wait. Scratch that. Talking to Duncan was like talking to a statue. A well-dressed, Harvard-bound statue that shared my penchant for blondes.

I don’t have interesting conversations with any of my friends.

He shrugged to himself, not very worried about this void. Scanning the room, he checked out the scene of Dick’s party. Dick had decided to throw a party in honor of Mayan fertility gods. Really it was his excuse to try to get Neptune’s most nubile females to engage in sexual acts under his roof while being plied with various top shelf concoctions. He reassuringly informed Logan that the party was to celebrate his freedom as well. “Dude, I’m like, totally stoked that you’re not going to jail for 15 to 20. You RULE.”

Logan didn’t mind being the collateral reason for the party. He didn’t mind blending in, not being the center of attention. After the hell of a past year he’d been through, he just wanted to soak up life and enjoy being free from worrying about going to jail for the murder of Felix Toombs.

Heaving a sigh of relief, he was reminded that he was also free from the machinations of the Fitzpatricks and their favorite patsy, Tom Griffith. Sure, he’d had to use an innocent girl to get there, and yes, he felt bad about it. But once Griffith signed a sworn affidavit as to his utter lack of knowledge of the murder, he and his precious Princess skipped town.

Oh, Princess H. You’re off to greener pastures. Trust me on this one.

He stared around at the debauchery going on all about him. Hannah wouldn’t have lasted a day as an 09er. She would have been eaten alive.

He keeps trying to convince himself that Hannah’s better off, that they’re all better off they way they are. But he knows he’s selfish. He knows what he did was self-serving. He tries feeling bitter about it. But he…can’t. He’s just too elated to be free, and to not be labeled a chip off the ol’ murderous block.

I’m not perfect. I’m not always a nice person. But I’m fucking free. And I love it.

“Hey Dickie, where’s the Beav?” Logan asked, looking around for his other – smaller, more timid, and smarter – friend.

“I think he went to pick up Elvira, queen of the night.” Logan looked at him quizzically, a question mark on his pursed lips. “You know, his little girlfriend.”

“Ah yes, Cindy Mac. She’s cool Dick, just give her a chance.”
Dick winced. “Whatever, man.”

Logan walked behind the bar, having decided he wanted to move on to the harder stuff. For my celebration, I will be conferring with my friends Jack and Johnnie.
He spun a shot glass out onto the bar and poured the amber-colored liquid in it. “Bottoms up,” he muttered to himself, and gulped it, enjoying the burn down the back of his throat.

Everything felt better, tasted better. He enjoyed the burn because he was feeling pain – these past few months, he had been numb, completely focused on one task and one task alone. It was as though now everything was more vibrant – lights, colors, smells, tastes.

Logan licked his lips and slammed the glass down with glee. As he felt the warmth rise in his face, he looked up, and saw her.

Veronica Mars sauntered into Chez Casablancas, trailing behind Cassidy and Mac.

Why is she here? He shook his head in wonder.

She was still an outsider, but at the same time, acted like she owned the place. He watched with curiosity as she looked around, with half interest and half disgust. She turned up her nose at the drunk, stumbling meatheads and shook her head at the scantily-clad airhead girls.

Logan smirked to himself. Always casing the joint. I love it.

When Veronica’s eyes finally settled on Logan, she smiled softly, but with an air of uncertainty, and offered a little finger-wave to him.

He waved back, amicably. After all, she had just spent the last few months helping him clear his name. They had been civil with each other as of late, though they hadn’t seen much of each other during his stint with Hannah.

When Veronica learned of his stint with Hannah, she said one thing, and one thing only. “Remember Logan – she’s just an innocent kid.” Logan sensed there were more unsaid words she’d intended to say -- She’s just an innocent kid. Like I was. Before Lilly died, before I was ‘raped,’ before your dad tried to kill me. Remember innocence? Yeah, I don’t either.

She didn’t have to say those things. He knew what she thought, he knew he was being despicable, but he needed his freedom.

He sensed it was because of this that she hadn’t said anything, why she didn’t stop him from using Hannah.

Nonetheless, things between them had been different. The playful, often spiteful bantering had stopped. She wasn’t harsh or biting, but she wasn’t joking or flirtatious with him anymore, either. She had simply rolled up her sleeves and helped him every step of the way. She saved his ass – and without comment.

Sometimes Logan would try to provoke her, making wry, inflammatory comments to get her going. She’d simply shrug him off and continue on her worker-bee way.

Logan had been disconcerted with her attitude, but was grateful that she’d stuck around, and that she and Weevil were on his team. Eventually, he stopped goading her and they worked in civil silence and peace.

He hadn’t seen her since before he’d escorted Griffith to the police station, where he signed a sworn affidavit disclaiming Logan’s involvement with Felix’s death. As Logan exited the station, feeling triumphant, he moved to call her, but Weevil had appeared out of the blue and said, “She knows.”

She always knew. It’s like she had eyes all over Neptune. She was pesky like that.

And there she was, standing before him, looking like she owned the place, and looking gorgeous while doing so.

When Logan would look back on the evening, he wouldn’t remember what she wore, but he would remember how she just…shined. Her hair was in loose waves around her shoulders, with little wisps kissing her face. Her skin looked so soft against the dim party lights; her face looked perfect and dewy.

She stood talking to Mac for a few minutes, and then she decided to walk toward him. She appeared to glide through the room, and as she did, everyone else appeared to fall away into the night. Logan fought a lump rising in his throat. She was beautiful, yes. She was the same Veronica he fell in love with months ago – this was true. But something was different, something he couldn’t really ignore.

He wasn’t sure if he needed her anymore.

This thought was killing him, but he feared it was true.

After she broke up with him, tossed him aside, and had run right into Duncan’s waiting arms, he went through different stages of loss. First, he was bitter. Then, he hated her. Then, he sought revenge, and slept with Kendall. Then – he begged her to save his ass.

He fell back into an old pattern of seeking her help. He’d needed her. And, despite her better judgment, she’d helped him.

But what did they mean to each other now? The mystery was solved. Logan didn’t need her help. He didn’t need her. And he was fearful of the thought.

“Hey,” she breathed, breaking him from his reverie. “Congratulations. Guess you won’t be Fisty McRapesalot’s bunkmate after all,” she smirked.

“Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be deeply disappointed. No fresh meat for him this month,” he said, rolling his eyes. “But, um…thanks.” He shifted around nervously, sliding the shot glass on the bar back and forth between his hands. Back and forth, back and forth. He refused to look at her, and just stared at the table.

“So.”

“So.”

“So are you going to pour me a shot or are you just going to stare at the shot glass?”

Logan looked up, raising his eyebrows with curiosity. “A shot? For real? You?”

“Yes, Logan. A shot. Yeah, me?” Veronica pointed at herself. “I can actually have fun sometimes.”

“Shock me shock me shock me,” he intoned, grinning. He pointed to the various liquor bottles littering the bar. “What’s your poison?”

“Gun-toting Irishmen,” she snarked. Logan gave her a look that said, ‘You cannot be serious.’ “Ha! Just kidding!” she said, pointing at him. “Just trying to keep you on your toes. Let’s see…” she surveyed the bottles, turning a few around to see the labels. “Well, if Dick’s got lemon slices, I’ll do a lemon drop.”

“Great, I’ll do one with you.” Logan prepared the shots and set out the lemons and sugar. They simultaneously licked their wrists, poured sugar on them, licked, gulped the shots down, and shoved the lemon slices in their mouths.

Veronica stood, leaning against the bar across from Logan, chewing on her lemon slice and looking pensive.

“Penny for your thoughts,” Logan said, while pouring himself another shot.

She nudged her own glass forward, and he took it, but not without shooting her a lot of surprise. She shrugged and smiled at him. Finally, after a few moments, she said, “I’m kind of…bored.”

“At this party?” He sliced the lemon down.

“No, no. I mean, in general. I mean, your mystery is solved. The bus crash mystery is solved. I’m…out of interesting things to think about.”

He pushed forward the shot and the lemon slice. Wordlessly, they repeated the shooter process.

After pulling the lemon slice from his mouth, Logan said, “Yeah, no, I know what you mean. I’m happy to be free, don’t get me wrong. But this is the first time in a long time things have been somewhat – normal – for me. You know, if you count having a dead mother and a father in prison.”

She shook her head. “Yeah. I used to miss normal. I used to crave it. Now…normal is kind of boring.”

Normal hit the both of them, and her words resonated in Logan’s head. Yes, normal. Things have gone back to normal. Normal where I don’t need her and she doesn’t need me. Normal where we don’t mean anything to each other. He hung his head, bitterly.

“Hey,” Veronica said, suddenly. He didn’t respond. “Hey!” She reached out with one finger and placed it under his chin, forcing him to look up at her. “You should be happy. You’re free! It’s all over.” She smiled at him genuinely.

It’s all over and we’re all over. Again.

“I’m…fine.” He said, trying to make himself looked perked-up. “I’m happy.”

“Dude, you so don’t look happy.”

“Well…neither do you.” He spoke the truth.

Veronica looked down at her hands and at that moment, Logan would have paid all his riches to know what was on her mind.

“Ooh!” she said brightly, changing her mood in an instant. “Let’s go sit by the pool. I want to dip my feet in the water.”

“Um. Okay,” he said, starting to round the corner of the bar. He began to lead the way. Surprisingly no one from the party was out by the pool…most people had retreated up to bedrooms to fool around. Mac and Beaver had mysteriously disappeared.

As they walked toward the back door, Veronica snagged a bottle of Jack and Logan laughed, shocked and amused. They made their way out back and kicked off their shoes. Veronica settled on the side of the pool first, hiking up her skirt a little bit, and dipped her feet in.

Logan rolled his pant legs up and followed suit. They sat in silence for a few moments, kicking their feet in the water, watching the lights in the pool change colors.

Logan gulped, but opened his mouth to speak the thoughts which had been playing on his mind all day. “Veronica…”

“Mm?”

“Do you ever wonder…I mean, do you ever think…like…” he struggled with the words, unsure of what exactly to say. Veronica sat patiently beside him, looking into the water, and at her own feet.

“Now that we’ve cleared my name…now that all that shit is over… I guess…are we not going to hang out anymore?”

Veronica didn’t lift her eyes from the water. “Um. I don’t know, Logan.”

Logan grew frustrated. Boy, she’s so helpful.

He said, a little coldly, “Well, I guess we won’t be. I mean, now that you don’t have to save my ass anymore, what’s the point, right?”

She sat there in silence, not answering him.

He continued. “I guess…since all this is over, things will go back to the way they were before.”

“Things can never go back to the way they were. I learned that the hard way,” she finally intoned.

“Huh?”

“With Duncan.”

“Oh.”

He took a swing of the whiskey and passed it to her. She did the same, and settled the bottle beside her.

“But… I guess… since I’m not your project anymore, you don’t need me. And since you solved my case, I don’t need you anymore, either.”

He wanted to smack himself for saying that. He blamed the booze, the night air, his impatience, his need to have everything defined. He wanted to dive headfirst into the pool and never resurface.

“My project?” she whispered. “My project?”

He said nothing,, willing himself to disappear, or evaporate.

“Is that all you thought this was? A project for me?”

“Or, a way to keep your mind off Duncan skipping town with his kid.”

She stared at her knees. “I guess that’s the way I made it look, huh?”

“Logan…” She began. “Logan, this wasn’t just a project. I wanted to help you. You’re…you’re Logan. You’re Duncan’s best friend, and Lilly’s boyfriend.”

“Yeah, Veronica, and what am I to you? Just a project.”

Logan loathed the silence between them. He stared at his own feet, following Veronica’s example. All of a sudden, he felt a push behind him, and he went flying into the pool. He opened his eyes under the water, disoriented.

That little minx just shoved me into the pool. That fucking brat.

Coughing, he surfaced, and looked to the edge of the pool. She wasn’t there.

“Where are you, you little brat!” He yelled. He could see his breath against the air. He thrashed around a little, and then settled when he couldn’t see her. He stayed stationary in the water, treading in place.

Suddenly, he felt a pinch at his side. He whirled around to find Veronica in the water behind him, laughing hysterically.

“Oh you think that’s funny, do you, Mars?”

She couldn’t stop laughing, but she nodded her head quickly.

“I’ll show you funny, little girl.” He surged forward toward her, and she stopped laughing instantly, yelping. He caught onto her shoulders and pushed her under the water. He dipped below the surface and caught hold of her, to still her thrashing limbs. After a few moments, he let go, and she bobbed to the top of the water.

She coughed, and he laughed at her. She looked at him bitterly. “You jackass.”

“Oh, so you can dish it out, but you can’t take it, huh?”

Veronica reached out a tiny foot and pushed him in the chest with her leg. “Oof. Thanks.”

She smiled.

“So. Miss V. Why’d you push me in the pool?” He asked, continuing to tread.

“Because you were being stupid.”

“Ah. I see. No, I don’t see. Stupid how?”

“Stupid with all your mopey talk. ‘You don’t need me. I don’t need you. I’m nothing to you,’ wah wah wah.” She put on a fake crying-voice

“Okay, I didn’t make it sound that pathetic.” He shook his head at her.

“Um, yeah, actually, ya did.” She swam over to the wall and leaned up against it, perching her foot on the underwater ledge. “Come here.”

“Hmm?” he mumbled, half into the water.

“Come over here, Echolls.” She motioned to him with a nod of her head.

He swam over, hesitantly, and stopped about a foot away from her.

“Look at me.” She grabbed his chin in her hand. “Look.” He obeyed, a little scared for what would come next.

“You might say, Logan Echolls, that you don’t need me. And that’s fine. I’m fine with that. But do NOT presume to know how I feel.”

“But…” he started.

“No. I’m talking.” He nodded to her, allowing her to continue. “Don’t say you’re just my project. You’re not. You know that. And you may not need me, but I…” she hesitated, and he saw that she was having difficulty with the words, “I need you.”

She let out a large, exaggerated breath as if those were the hardest words she’d ever spoken.

“What?!” He exclaimed, practically shouting. “You…what?”

“You heard me. Don’t make me say it again.”

“You need me, like, how? You need me to be your scapegoat, your whipping boy? I guess I could see that. You need me around to make fun of. Well, listen to me, Ver…”

She cut him off, putting her hand around the back of his neck, drawing him to her, crushing her lips against his. They pulled apart, for a moment, and Logan found himself out of breath and dumbfounded.

“Shut up, Logan. Just shut up.” Veronica pulled him close again and he complied. Once their lips were touching again, he took charge, taking her chin in his hand and manipulating his mouth against hers. He prodded her lips open and slid his tongue against hers, tasting her like he hadn’t in months. She tasted like lipgloss and alcohol, sweet but bitter. He pressed her harder against the wall, and he could feel her heart beat against his chest. He ran his tongue along hers, wanting to taste every centimeter of her mouth.

They pulled away, lightly, their faces still within inches of each other. Her eyes sparkled as they looked deeply into his, and her lips looked moist, red and plump. He brushed wet hair away from her face, and tucked it behind her ears.

She kissed him softly, once, and pulled back. “I missed you. I missed…how you taste,” she said shyly.

“God, I missed you, too,” he proclaimed, taking her into his arms, kissing her on both cheeks.

“This will never be normal, will it? You and me?” She inquired, kissing his lower lip.

“Nope. Who wants normal?” He grinned, and nipped her nose with his lips.

“Certainly not me,” she laughed. “Normal’s boring.”

“For the record, V?” she nodded to him in response. “I need you, too.”

“I know.”

“You know?! Well, aren’t we presumptuous?”

“Yup.” And with that, she hoisted herself up onto the edge of the pool. He lifted himself up, and shook out his wet clothes. “I’m so presumptuous,” she began, “that I presume that you will promptly take me back to your suite and help me get out of these wet clothes.”

He grabbed her hand, and shoving in his other hand in his pocket, retrieved his car keys. “Oh, yes ma’am!” he exclaimed, and he tugged her toward the driveway and to the waiting XTerra as her laughs filled the night air.

Fic: The Game, R, (L/V, L/H, ensemble)

Sun, 05 Mar 2006 22:40:42 GMT

Title: The Game
Author: Amanda
Rating: R
Character/Pairing: L/V, L/Hannah, Mac, Beaver, Weevil
Word count: 4,887
Spoilers: S2 so far
Disclaimer: Rob owns, I don't, la la la
Summary: Karaoke and competition at Java the Hut
A/N: So I have been thinking about this idea for a long time. I recently read another fic with karaoke in it, but I think this is a totally different idea (that being said, that was a really good fic, I forget the name/author, but it was great). My inspiration for this was from songs I'm loving right now - save the song Hannah sings.
More disclaimers: The song Beav sings is "A Praise Chorus" by Jimmy Eat World, and the song Veronica sings is "Portions For Foxes" by Rilo Kiley. (I LOVE Jenny Lewis's voice, and know that KB could sing this well. I would love her to sing some Rilo Kiley on the show for real). The song Hannah sings is "It's Gonna Be Love" by Mandy Moore (I needed a sugary-sweet ballad). Let me know what you think!

“That little effin’ weasel.”

“Yo, V., you don’t have to convince me. Or…are you trying to convince yourself?” Weevil asked amusedly, smirking at the scowl plastered over Veronica’s face.

“Oh, I don’t need convincing. I know his weasel-like tendencies. This is just another one for the immortal list.”

“Heh.” Weevil continued to chuckle, and took a sip of the strong coffee Veronica poured for him. The Columbian blend tasted good to him, and he mentally thanked Veronica for introducing him to coffee in the past few weeks. He’d been visiting her at Java the Hut ever since the day he and Logan had asked her to bug St. Mary’s confessional, to keep her up-to-date on the Felix business, and to ask for the occasional favor. Today he had come to her with particularly interesting news.

Veronica seethed as she put the coffee pot back on its warmer. “What is he thinking?! Wait, he’s not thinking. Of COURSE. Jesus Christ on a cracker,” Weevil looked up from his coffee again, but realized his precious V. wasn’t talking to him, she was mumbling maniacally to herself, shaking her head as she stared at the floor.

“V. Calm down. I think he has a plan. Scratch that, I know he has a plan.”

“Heh. A plan. Good one. Maybe he’d have a plan if he used that ONE brain cell he’s got. Too bad it’s been dormant for eighteen years.”

“Okay, V. I can’t believe I’m saying this, trust me. But…I think he’s got it together this time.”

She stopped, and finally looked Weevil in the eye. “Oh God. You’ve caught it.” She gasped, in mock-horror.

“Caught what?!” He shook his head at her, confused. He squinted at her, as if to examine her thoughts.

“His pure and utter stupidity. I order you to stop hanging out with him. I know your little ‘banditos’ act is fun, but seriously. I fear you’re getting dumber by the moment.”

Weevil laughed at her so hard his sides began to ache. “Stop, V, stop. The coffee is already givin’ me an ulcer. You’re just compounding it. For reals, girl.”

Veronica calmed down a little when it finally struck her how crazy she was sounding. She didn’t want to let him get to her, but it was just so easy as of late. Carrying guns, lying about eyewitnesses, asking her to bug confessionals at Catholic churches… he was incorrigible. His latest stunt was just about the straw that broke the camel’s back.

But not quite. She knew that she was still on his side. She didn’t want him to be locked away until he was a gray-haired, emaciated 30-something having had his formative years sucked away for a bad rap. She sighed and reminded herself she was only doing this because he was Duncan’s best friend. Lilly’s ex-boyfriend. Her once-dear friend. That’s the ticket, she thought.

Weevil knew better. He saw the wheels turning in her head, he knew what she was thinking, and he frankly knew better. He knew that the reasons she cooked up for helping Logan Echolls, the reasons she tried to convince herself were real, weren’t. He shook his head, knowing that this dance was bound to go on forever.

“Anyway, Veronica, I just thought you’d like to know…” he stood up, preparing to leave. He slid his leather jacket on and pulled some crumpled cash out of his pocket.

“…that idiot of the century is planning on plowing Nip/Schmuck’s daughter so he’ll recant his story?” Veronica rolled her eyes. Before Weevil could answer, she glanced at her watch. “Okay, go, go. My break’s up anyhow,” she swallowed, not very prepared to work closing shift. Her feet were sore, her back ached, and her eyes were burning. Not to mention she wasn’t looking forward to hearing lame-asses croon mushy love songs to their girlfriends during karaoke night, which was just about underway.

The karaoke DJ tipped his funky-looking hat in her direction, and she smiled a fake, toothy grin, inwardly groaning.

Weevil chuckled again at his petite blonde comrade and, patting her softly on the back, took off for the front door. There was no way he was sticking around to hear bad 80s music sung by boys whose voices hadn’t cracked yet.

Veronica went behind the counter and tied her apron back on. She peered at the metallic side of the espresso machine to check her face and hair. Her hair was still in its perfect chignon at her neck, and her makeup was decent-looking. She grabbed a compact out of her pocket to hide the dark circles forming under her eyes. She needed a rest – working two jobs and doing the school thing just were NOT happening anymore. After patting some powder on, she grabbed her pad and pen and headed out onto the floor to her section.

As she passed by the entrance, she heard a voice call out, “Veronica. Hey, Bond!” She spun on her heel to see Mac, with Beaver following close behind. “Oh hey, guys,” she said, tiredly.

“You look tired. Are you as tired as you look?” Mac intoned, looking concernedly at her weary friend.

“Gee. Thanks Mac.” She shrugged. “But yeah…I am tired. I’m beat as hell.”

“Nah, you look great, Veronica,” Beaver offered, shyly. Mac gave him a look, and he looked at her in return, mouthing ‘What?!’ She shook her head and laughed, realizing he just wanted to pick Veronica’s spirits up. She clutched his hand, proud to be his new girlfriend.

Veronica’s lips settled into a line – she wasn’t disconcerted, but she was a little sick of all the couple-ness going on as of late… Mac and the Beav, Wallace and his lady friend of the week… Logan and his little chicklet. She admonished herself inwardly for even thinking about that pairing, but she shook it off and offered to seat Mac and Beaver in her section. They nodded enthusiastically, and she placed them at a small table close to the karaoke stage. Mac jibed Beaver, and jokingly asked him if he would sing a song to her later.

“Only if you’re really, really good,” he winked at her.

The sugar shock was just about to take Veronica as its prisoner, so she took their orders quickly and jetted around to the other tables.

A fun, funky beat begins as the next singer gets up. Veronica recognizes the song, and bops her head to the beat as she checks on her customers.

I’m on my feet, I’m on the floor I’m good to go
All I need is just to hear a song I know
I wanna always feel like part of this was mi-eee-ine
I wanna fall in love tonight…

She looked up suddenly, knowing the chorus to the song. Before her she saw the one, the one, the only, Cassidy Casablancas, belting out “A Praise Chorus” in time with the quick, frenzied tune. She stared in disbelief as he rocked out, dancing a little to the beat. Mac bounced up and down in her seat, with a look of pure adoration on her face.

Crimson and clover, over and over
Crimson and clover, over and over
Our house in the middle of the street,
Why did we ever meet?
Started my rock and roll fantasy
Don’t don’t, don’t let’s start, why did we ever part?
Kick start my rock 'n rollin’ heart.

Beaver slowed down along with the music’s beat. He cocked his one eyebrow at Mac, trying his best to look rock ‘n roller sexy. She giggled but continued to clap along.

Veronica smiled as her customers clapped in time with Beaver’s rendition of the song. This was the most rousing edition of Wednesday night karaoke since she worked there. She grinned in spite of herself, and her cynic’s view of karaoke night.

…I wanna fall in love tonight,
Here tonight.
I wanna always feel like part of this,
Was,
Mine.
I wanna fall in love tonight.

Beaver pointedly looked at Mac as the song wound down.

I wanna fall in love tonight.
I wanna fall in love tonight.

I wanna fall in love tonight.

Out of breath, he finished his performance, and all of a sudden, it was like he realized for the first time that he had an audience larger than Mac alone. Beaver blushed furiously, biting his lower lip. As the crowd cheered him, he shuffled nervously off the stage, all jitters, blushes and uncertainty. He made his way back to his table, unsure of what Mac’s reaction would be. Veronica smiled as she watched Mac throw her arms around Beaver’s neck to kiss him. She laughed bemusedly as Beaver sat there, looking shocked, his eyes wide open in an exclamation point as his girlfriend lavished praise upon him in the form of kisses.

“Veronica? V? Hello. Earth to Mars?” Veronica was shaken from her voyeurism by her coworker. She shook her head as if snapping herself out of some daydream, and blinked a few times as she apologized. “Oh jeez, Jen, I’m sorry. Got caught up in the entertainment.”

“It’s cool. That guy was really good. Friend of yours?”

“Yeah…kind of.” Veronica smirked.

“Well, I just seated customers in your section, table 23.”

“Thanks, Jen.” Veronica whirled around, whipping the pen out from where it was tucked behind her right ear. She glanced down at her orders pad and flipped through to a clean page. She knew the Hut like the back of her hand now, and instinctively walked back to table 23 without watching where she was going. She scribbled a few things down, and asked, “Okay. What can I get you this evening?”

“I’ll just have a regular coffee. Black.”

Hearing the familiar voice, Veronica looked up, prepared to curl her lip into a scowl. She stopped suddenly when she saw that the owner of the familiar voice was far from alone.

Logan grinned smugly at her, and she fought the urge to run back to the counter, grab a pot of hot coffee, and pour it all over him. Instead, she scribbled something on her pad. “Coffee. Black.” She turned her attention for the first time to Logan’s date. “And for you, miss?”

She drank in the sight of Hannah Griffith. She was thin and tall, all angles and bones. Her face was fresh and pretty, unmarred by sadness or any harsh reality. She looked perfectly cherubic. Veronica stifled a groan, and swallowed instead.

Hannah was flipping through the drink menu. “Hm. I really don’t know. I mean, I have really never drunk coffee or cappuccino or anything…” Veronica and Logan raised their eyebrows simultaneously.

“Really? I can’t live without the stuff.” Veronica said, attempting to joke with the young girl.

“It just…seems too bitter,” Hannah said, making a face.

Veronica waited to roll her eyes until Hannah was again engrossed in the menu.

Logan raised his hand to his face and put one knuckle into his mouth, trying to suppress laughter.

Veronica sighed exasperatedly as the young girl flipped through the menu slowly. She looked around as her section began to fill up rather rapidly. “If you want me to give you a minute, I’d be happy to…” To get away from here as fast as possible.

“Honey…” Logan began, and Veronica choked at hearing the word. “Honey, why don’t you try an iced mocha or something? They’re good. Sweet, just like you.” On the word “you,” Logan nipped the tip of Hannah’s nose flirtatiously with his index finger, and she giggled like a schoolgirl.

Veronica gripped her orders pad so hard her knuckles turned white. “So?” she said, trying to hide her impatience with Hannah and her annoyance at Logan’s little show.

Hannah didn’t turn her adoring gaze away from Logan. “Sure. If Logan says iced mocha, I’ll try iced mocha.”

Way to have a backbone, Pre-Pubescent Barbie.

“Sounds great,” Veronica intoned, with fake enthusiasm. “Your boyfriend has wonderful taste.” She winked at Hannah, putting meaningful emphasis on “boyfriend.”

At that word, Logan began to cough. Veronica grinned and whirled around to put the order in.

Veronica stood behind the counter and surreptitiously watched Logan and Hannah, peering around the espresso machine. She prepared their drinks but viewed them like a bird of prey all the while, grimacing.

How dare he use this poor girl? What a goddamned vulture.

She looked down at their coffees and sucked in a hard breath, trying hard to convince herself that this was the only reason she was mad.

She peered back up at them, from her hiding spot. Logan had his arm around Hannah, and his lips were up next to her ear. Hannah giggled wildly at whatever he whispered to her, and she would turn every few moments to whisper back. Every so often, Logan would tickle her sides and she would giggle again and again…

Oh my God. If she giggles one. more. effin’. time… Veronica cringed.
She dutifully placed the cups on her tray and headed back over to the lovebirds, bracing herself. As she moved closer toward them, a question hit her in the back of the head.

Why did he bring her here, of all places? He knows I work here…

Oh.

That little weasel.

She cursed his name under her breath as she approached them. Whether Logan was using this poor girl or not was no longer her main concern.

He’s trying to piss me off.

She arrived at their table and handed each of them their coffees. With pure, unadulterated, unexaggerated, non-mocking sweetness, she intoned, “I just have to say – I mean, it’s so not my place, I’m just the help, but…”

Logan raised his eyebrow at her sweet tone. He sensed something was amiss.

“You guys,” Veronica breathed, “are like, THE cutest couple I’ve ever seen. How long have you two been together?” She looked at Hannah with interest.

Hannah’s face brightened. She looked at Veronica as though she was the kindest person alive. “Aw! How sweet of you to say! Not long…we just met.”

Logan sipped his coffee, wishing to remain silent.

“Wow. I bet it was just love at first sight, because, well – look at you! You are so adorable! I could just eat you up!” Veronica gushed at Hannah, patting her shoulder.

Logan spit out a sip of his coffee back into the cup. Veronica smirked. Logan breathed a short sigh when he realized Hannah didn’t see his reaction. He needed to keep it together, needed her to think he was as into her as she was into him. He rolled his eyes, realizing that his idea for coming here was seriously biting him in the ass.

“Seriously – you are so sweet to say all this!” Hannah instantly became enamored with Veronica and her seemingly-genuine kindness.

“Well. Enjoy your coffee and your date. And, if you’re so inclined, you should totally sing karaoke!” Veronica gestured to the stage and smiled sweetly at them. Hannah beamed brightly at her and Logan buried his face in his cup of coffee, trying not to look miserable. He slunk down in his chair, and Veronica felt like soaring.

She slinked away, and when her back was to them, she grinned triumphantly to herself.

We’ll see who pisses who off here, Echolls. Licking her index finger, she marked a point up for herself on an imaginary scoreboard.

For the next hour, Veronica greeted customers breezily and was the model employee. She weaved between her tables, checking on people frequently, striking up friendly conversations with everyone around her. She put Ms. Veronica “Cynic of the Century” Mars on the shelf for one evening, and acted like the hostess with the mostest.

She couldn’t help but notice that Logan grew more and more agitated-looking. As she would breeze by, he would look after her, his mouth twitching. Veronica would grin to herself as she would hear Hannah intermittently ask Logan if he heard what she just said.

Logan grew more and more annoyed that Veronica was bopping about the room, all smiles and laughs. He watched her as she settled into a chair at Mac and Beaver’s table, right in his line of sight. He nodded absently as Hannah prattled on next to him.

Veronica caught his eye and grinned smugly at him. You can’t possibly piss me off now, Logan. Just try.

As if hearing Veronica’s smirking thoughts, Logan turned suddenly to Hannah. He caught her mid-sentence, but didn’t pause to put his mouth over hers. She parted her lips with a short gasp and he slid his tongue expertly between her teeth, and massaged her tongue with his. He turned his head seductively and brought one hand to her face, tracing along her angular jawline. She was pressed up close to him and he felt her heart race. He got a little satisfaction out of this, and continued to kiss her fervently. Finally, he pulled away and looked in her stunned expression.

Hannah let out a hard, ragged breath and gazed at him lovingly.

He felt awful for a moment, seeing the obvious adoration she had for him. God, I’m a shit. He straightened himself was reminded that he was doing this to save himself from jail.

He looked over at Veronica, whose mouth hang wide open.

…pissing Veronica off in the process isn’t a bad side project, either.

“Logan? Did you hear what I said?” Hannah asked.

“Mm? Oh I’m sorry Hannah. I was totally distracted by…you. So pretty.” He kissed her on her flushed cheek.

She giggled playfully. “Well, if that’s why you were distracted, I can’t be mad about that.”

He smiled at her. “So what were you saying?”

“I think I’m going to sing. Karaoke. I sing sometimes…for church choir.”

Of course she does. “That sounds great, Princess.”

He watched her as she bounded up to the stage to talk to the DJ. He glanced over at Beaver and Mac’s table, and saw that Veronica had gone. He scanned the room and saw her behind the counter, talking to a coworker. She looked around for a moment and caught him looking at her.

She rolled her eyes at him and continued chatting.

Bingo. I SO got to you, Mars. Point for the illustrious Mr. Echolls, he thought, patting himself on the back.

Logan’s thoughts were interrupted by Hannah’s voice, over the microphone. He turned his attention to her, standing under the stage’s spotlight.

“I’d like to dedicate this song to a very special boy,” Hannah said, sweetly, to the audience. She winked at Logan as the first strains of the song began.

Veronica watched on, irritated. The song began, and with a sweet, angelic voice Hannah sang a sugary ditty – some teeny-bopper song.

“It’s gonna be love,
It’s gonna be great,
It’s gonna be more than I can take.
It’sgonna be free,
It’s gonna be real,
It’s gonna change everything I feel…

It’s gonna be sad,
It’s gonna be true,
It’s gonna be me, baby,
It’s gonna be you, baby,
It’s gonna be love…”

Veronica thought she was going to gag. People die from this much sugar shock. I hope there aren’t any diabetics in the crowd tonight.

“The sooner you let two hearts beat together…
The sooner you’ll know this love is forever…”

Logan let out a long sigh. Okay. This is just embarrassing. He looked around, and caught Beaver’s eye. Beaver gave him a look that said ‘wow…this girl is…interesting.’

He felt like melting into his seat. He didn’t want to look over at Veronica. She must be just loving this.

Veronica was loving it. She saw Logan slink farther and farther down into his seat, and she grinned winningly.

As Hannah finished her performance, she bounced down to Logan and wrapped her arms around him. “That was great, Han. Just smashing.” He tried to sound very convincing, and thought he was doing a decent job. She kissed him on the cheek, beaming at him.

From behind the counter, Veronica suddenly had an idea. She walked unnoticed up to the karaoke DJ and whispered something to him. He nodded.

She walked back behind the counter, and waved Jen down. “Jen – would you mind covering my tables for just like, 5 minutes?”

“Yeah, no problem, V,” Jen answered. She watched as Veronica undid the knot of hair at her neck, letting her wavy blond hair cascade about her shoulders. “What’s – what’s up?”

Veronica viewed herself in the espresso machine metal. “You’ll see,” she grinned wickedly. “Do you have lipstick?”

Jen fished around in her apron pockets, and gave Veronica deep-red lipstick.

“Perfect. Thanks.” She applied it, and after handing it back to Jen, she took off her vest, and unbuttoned her white shirt a few buttons. Taking off her apron and throwing it under the counter, she straightened her short black skirt and strode confidently out to the stage.

She noted that none of her friends nor Logan noticed she walked up on the stage.

She grabbed the mic as the DJ announced, “And up next – we have the Hut’s favorite waitress – sorry Jen – Veronica Mars!”

Logan’s ears perked up and he looked toward the stage in awe. Hannah pushed him lightly and squealed. “It’s our waitress!” He nodded, and gulped.

Mac looked up at Veronica questioningly. Veronica shrugged at her, and the music began to swell.

She tapped her foot along with the music, and licked her lips before she began.

“There's blood on my mouth 'cause I've been biting my tongue all week
I keep on talking trash but I never say anything…
and the talking leads to touching
and the touching leads to sex” – Logan raised his eyebrows.
and then there is no mystery left…”

She began to swing her hips seductively in time with the music, and danced along with the beat.

“And it's bad news
baby, I'm bad news
I’m just bad news bad news bad news

I know I'm alone if I'm with or without you
but just being around you offers me another form of relief…”

She glanced at Logan, briefly, and kept going.

“When the loneliness leads to bad dreams
and the bad dreams lead me to calling you
and I call you and say, ‘Come here!’

And it's bad news
Baby I'm bad news
I’m just bad news bad news bad news…”

Logan breathed softly as he watched her sway, her hips moving with the underlying beat of the song. Under the lights her hair shone like spun gold, and he watched with bated breath as her moist lips moved, as if in slow motion.

“'Cause you're just damage control
For a walkin' corpse like me, like you
'cause we'll all be portions for foxes
yeah we'll all be portions for foxes”

The music slowed down, and she looked right into Logan’s eyes. She began, forcefully,

“There's a pretty young thing in front of you
and she's real pretty and she's real into you
and then she's sleeping inside of you
and the talking leads to touching
and the touching leads to sex” - her voice hissed the word, and she saw him glance at sweet, innocent Hannah.
and then there is no mystery left.

And it's bad news
I don't blame you
I'd do the same thing
I get lonely too.”

Logan gulped as he stared at the songstress on stage. She was all hips, lips, and bad-girl sensual. He hated her a little.

But mostly he wanted to touch her.

“Baby you're bad news
and you're bad news…

Veronica paused with the song, emphatically, changing mood as the lyrics did.

“I don't care - I like you
And you're bad news
I don't care - I like you, I like you.

She finished, licking her lips and smoothing down her skirt. The audience erupted… no one (unless they were a Triton) really knew that Veronica Mars could sing, or that she had a voice like that. Hannah sounded sweet and angelic, but Veronica sang with seduction on the tip of her tongue – her voice was sultry and deep, and male patrons were staring after her like she was a goddess.

As she flounced off the stage self-assuredly, she caught sight of Logan. She smirked at him, as his mouth was agape. He looked dazed.

Watch the drool there, buddy, she thought, as she tucked her hair back up in a knot. She licked her finger again and gave herself another point in the sky scoreboard.

Logan, cottoning on, felt his face go hot as his fury rose in his throat. He turned to Hannah roughly. “Hannah. Would you excuse me a second? I have to call my…my…aunt. I’ll just be a moment,” he shook his phone at her.

“Yeah, of course!” She said, totally oblivious to what had just happened, to the effect her waitress had on her new boyfriend.

Logan walked through the restaurant and to the edge of the counter. Veronica stood close to a door, smirking to herself as she pulled her uniform vest back on.

“You are so aggravating,” he hissed, catching her attention.

“Oh, Logan. Wouldn’t your life be so much easier if you were indifferent to me?” she echoed earlier sentiments of his, and he scowled at her. Before he could muster his next thought, she cut him off. “Don’t even say you are. Because you wouldn’t have flaunted your little project in front of me if you were.”

She backed herself up against the door. Logan read the sign above her head – ‘Storage Room’ – and, placing his hand by her head, pushed the door in, and shut them inside, flipping the light on.

“You’re jealous,” he hissed, pleased and pissed all at once.

“Don’t flatter yourself. I’m pissed because you’re using a sweet and innocent girl for your own benefit.”

He knew she knew that much. He’d figured she would have deduced it herself or with the help of his fine, bald Mexican friend.

He shook his head at her. “Yeah. That’s why you just did your sultry songstress act up there, right? Because you know she’s just a pawn?”

“Oh please. If your ego got any bigger, this room would explode.” She crossed her arms over her chest, spitting her words at him.

“You haven’t denied it.”

“Denied what, jackass?”

“Deny that you’re jealous. Tell me you’re not.”

“I’m not. Oh, and by the way?” She shouted. “Fuck you!”

Logan launched himself at her. For a split second, she was scared, even though she instinctively knew he’d never hurt her. He pushed her up against the back wall of the storage room, pressing himself against her. He crushed his lips over hers, forcing her lips open.

She couldn’t think or breathe, she just accepted his tongue like it was second nature. She bit at him, and sucked at his tongue, then his lower lip, with fervent force.

As he pressed further into her, she felt his erection against her hips and she gasped at the size of him. He ignored her gasps, and continued to attack her mouth hungrily. She grasped at his shoulders, his back, the back of his head.

He took her hands and pinned them against the wall, above her head, with one large, strong hand. He bent down and sucked the pulse point on her neck until he elicited soft moans from her. He moved his mouth back to hers and sucked her tongue inside. He shoved a hand up her shirt, and looking into her permissive eyes, ran a thumb over her nipple. She cried out into his mouth and wrapped her leg around his waist, pulling him flush to her. Logan reached under the hem of her skirt and began to brush his fingers against the dampened cotton of her panties.

“Veronica?” a voice came from outside the door, with a knock.

They pushed apart from each other quickly, and Logan pulled her skirt back down for her. They stared at each other in surprise and shock and she mustered, “Um? Yeah, Jen?”

“Um. I have to take my break now.”

“I’ll be right out.”

Without a word, she pushed past Logan, and as she approached the door, she turned toward him, with her mouth open.

He approached her, and opened the door for her. He hid a little, so no one outside would see him. As she began her exit, he caught her shoulder in his hand and bent close to her ear. “And the talkin’ leads to touchin’, and the touchin’ leads to sex…”

“And then there is no mystery left.” She breathed.

He kissed her temple, and she walked out, back to work. Veronica tied her apron on and started to clean the counter off. She had to remind herself to breathe, and tried to will her arousal away. She bit her lip and settled into work, but couldn’t forget his kiss on her lips or his hands all over her.

Logan emerged a few moments later, and headed back to Hannah. As he sat down, she asked brightly, “How’s your aunt?”

Logan took a swig of his cold coffee and snuck a glance at Veronica. Behind the counter, Veronica ducked her head and blushed, but smirked at him.

His stare at Veronica went unmoved. “She’s fantastic. Just …fantastic.”

--

Nothing Can Compare, Epilogue, NC-17 (L/V, Ensemble)

Fri, 03 Mar 2006 05:30:44 GMT

Title: Nothing Can Compare, Epilogue (after 6 part series)
Author: rubie_so_ho (Amanda)
Characters: Logan/Veronica, then Ensemble
Word Count: 2,256
Rating: Hard R, slight NC-17
Spoilers: S1 and 2 so far, then AU
Disclaimer: All belong to the man, the myth, the legend - Rob T.!
Notes: I wanted this to be simple. Let me know what you think :) Also - thanks for the great feedback and support from everyone who writes in. There's mutual appreciation - you guys are awesome!

Epilogue

Veronica writhes underneath Logan’s touch, and clings to him. Embraces of desperation have turned into embraces of comfort and love, and both feel a sense of relief. Logan sighs happily into Veronica’s mouth and deepens his kisses. He moves against her, up and down, up and down. Pressing himself gently between her legs, he quickens his pace, up and down and up and down.

She does not speak. Her breath simply becomes more ragged, more eager, more guttural. She closes her eyes as if feeling some ecstasy she’s never felt before. Every few seconds, her lids flutter open and they lock eyes, her blues following his browns as he moves up and down, up and down.

Low moans escape her. She feels perspiration bead around her forehead, in the crook of her neck, underneath her breasts, between her legs. The backs of her knees are slick and shiny.

Logan senses the increased heat between them, and touches her in all her sweat-slicked spots. He reaches behind her knee and pulls up, forcing her to link her leg around his muscled lower back. She follows suit and digs her heel in the curve just above his ass.

They are silent. There are no words, only sighs, moans, grunts and hitched breaths.

There is no music, but this is the most intricate dance they’ll ever attempt.

She sweeps her hand up his back, down his back, in time with his movements. She sweeps it back down and grabs his ass, pulling him flush against her. She widens the space between her legs, and he reaches down, knowing this is tacit permission. Running his fingers along her soft folds, he captures her wetness, and uses it to his advantage. He touches her sensitive spot gently but firmly, applying more friction as she moans harder and harder.

In response, she presses her thigh against his hardness, and moves against him.

He groans, and she brings her hand, clasping firmly around his girth. Her eyes are connected with his, enthralled by his excitement. She’s pleased that he is pleased. She smiles, and increases the speed of her strokes.

Together, their breathing becomes quicker and sporadic.

Veronica quivers under Logan’s touch. She moves against his fingers, and he against her hand.

They dance.

A feeling builds within her, a rapid, warm feeling. It creeps from her core up through her abdomen and down through her legs.

She moans a low, sweet moan. A moan that Logan has never heard from her. He looks up into her eyes, a question forming at the corners of his. She nods to him, and reaching into the drawer beside them, he pulls out a tinfoil package, rips it open in one quick movement, and rolls the latex on.

She nods to him again. He reaches behind her neck with one hand, stroking the nape of her neck, swirling in her soft blonde hair. With his other hand, he travels down her body back down between them, opening her to him.

With Duncan, this would be the time she would close her eyes, brace herself.

Her eyes are wide open, watching Logan’s every move. He doesn’t look down awkwardly, he doesn’t shift to make sure every move is perfect.

Their dance is already perfect. It’s graceful. It’s practiced, even though this is their first dance.

It’s almost as if they’ve prepared for this. As though every dream, every fantasy was a dress rehearsal.

He does not pause, nor hesitate. He slides into her, slowly but evenly.

She does not gasp at his size, but welcomes the large length of him, her eyes warm with longing.

They move in time to inaudible music, each thrust in perfect time.

He moans as he feels her grow slicker beneath him, her wetness coating him. He bends down, taking each nipple into his mouth, edging his teeth around the sensitive flesh, thumbing the weight of each breast in tandem.

She absently scratches up and down his back, into his buttocks, snaking her hands down the backs of his thighs. She allows her hands to roam freely, up his sides, into his hair.

As his thrusts move faster, she hooks both her legs around his, tensing at the friction occurring between their pelvic bones. Their hip bones touch, grinding against each other.

Logan shudders in response to her touch, and his excitement builds within him. As their thrusts increase, he feels closer and closer to the edge. He slows a bit, to temper himself.

Sliding his hand between them, he teases her nub with his forefinger and middle finger, which are warm and wet from their combined perspiration and Veronica’s inner juices. Veronica cries out, and bites into Logan’s shoulder. She grunts, as if it to say ‘faster, faster, faster,’ and he knows, so he complies. As his strokes quicken, she begins to writhe, swirling her hips against his, and circling herself against the friction his fingers provide.

Her toes curl and she meets his thrusts faster and harder. As she begins to buck against him, he pinches down on her nub, and she screams and moans as a flood of color washes over her.

He silences her screams with his mouth, his tongue against hers, his teeth clicking briefly against hers.

He feels his own heat build in response to the contractions around his hardness. He feels his penis become harder between her pulsing walls, and he bites down on his lower lip as he comes, and clutching onto her body with every fiber alive within him.

They remain like that, wrapped up by each other, panting, sighing, clammy, hot. Logan brings his lips to Veronica’s forehead, and it takes him a moment to realize that she’s shaking beneath him. Pulling away and peering down, he sees tears flow from her eyes. He kisses the streaks they form on her cheeks, and holds her close, inwardly vowing to never let this tiny blonde go, not ever again.

***

- Five years later -

She looks out the wall of windows before her, sun streaming against her porcelain-like, but slightly sun-kissed, skin. It’s the most beautiful day in May, and it reminds her of the day Keith married Alicia.

The day her family began to rebuild.

She gazes out, her eyes touching the cliff looming far out behind the house, and then the ocean beyond it. It’s a deep navy blue marked by silver, and in the distance she can see sailboats bobbing in the light breeze.

Sighing, she looks down from the view to look at the picture frames before her on the grand piano. There’s a picture of Wallace and Darryl hugging Darryl’s 8th grade graduation. Next to it is a picture of the Mars-Fennel family on her first Christmas break from Stanford. Keith has Alicia in his lap, and she’s laughing at the camera, her eyes twinkling. They are flanked by Wallace, Darryl and Veronica, who all smile at their cutesy parents. There is a picture of Wallace’s graduation from USC. On the other side of the piano are pictures of her other family, her extended family. A sweet silver frame holds a picture of Mac and Cassidy, who married their first year at Cal Tech. In Mac’s arms is a tiny little baby with chubby cheeks and Beaver’s smile. The simple wooden frame next to that is Weevil on his proudest day; his graduation from Hearst with honors.

Flanking all the pictures are pictures of those loved and lost. There is a photo of Lilly Kane, brash and beautiful in her gold homecoming dress, looking immortal – young forever. There is a tiny photo of Meg Manning, so innocent and fresh. A large photo of Lynn Echolls stands out, with a pink ribbon tied in one corner.

Veronica looks at her family and lost friends and smiles. She feels and felt so much love, for all these people, and whether they were here or not, she feels calm and happy.

In the midst of all these pictures are the most important… The whole group at Neptune graduation – Veronica, Logan, Wallace, Mac, Beaver, Jackie and Weevil. Veronica and Logan at their joint graduation from Stanford, class of 2010, Veronica with her degree in criminology and Logan with his in marketing. Veronica and Logan in Florence, when he proposed. Veronica and Logan before the very house she was in, on the day they bought it – the mansion on the cliff, overlooking the Pacific and Santa Barbara.

She smiled at her loved ones, captured for all time in photographs. She turned, toward a long mirror on the wall next to her, and smoothed the invisible wrinkles in her perfect cream dress. She adjusted the strapless bodice and turned, straightening the lines in the back of her dress.

She isn’t startled when Alicia comes behind her, but instead grins warmly at her stepmother. Alicia whispers “Stop. You look perfect. Elegant. Wonderful,” in Veronica’s ear. Veronica blushes.

She is not nervous, nor jittery, nor over-eager. She’s just ready, and glowing with happiness.

Wallace peeks his head in, not looking at her or his mother. “It’s time, Superfly.”

She nods to herself, then at Alicia. Taking Alicia’s hand, she follows her to the back door of the house, which leads out into the garden. Alicia kisses her softly and walks out the door. She hears a cough behind her and turns.

Keith approaches his baby girl with tears in his eyes. He hasn’t been this happy since the day five years before when he married Alicia. “Beautiful” is the only word he can manage. She fights back tears and tucks her tiny hand into the crook of his proffered arm. He looks dapper and sweet in his smooth black tux. She hears music begin to swell and imagines Jackie, Alicia, Trina, and Mac gliding down the aisle in their chic, short ocean-blue dresses. The music changes time, and the double doors are opened before them. As they step out onto the white silk carpet, Veronica leans into Keith and whispers, “I love you Daddy,” and Keith sighs.

She looks ahead of her and sees every person she loves that is still with them. Beaver is best man, very dashing looking, and taller than he was at 17. Next to him is Dick, who is already on his second marriage at age 23. Wallace stands next to Dick, beaming at his stepsister and stepfather. Darryl, a shy teen, rounds out the groomsmen, shifting his weight between his feet and blushing.

The women look stunning. Maid of honor Mac – now Cindy Casablancas, but still Mac, still Q to Veronica’s Bond – looks pure and sweet, her gaze darting between Veronica and her fairly new husband. Trina’s looks have softened with age, and she's grown into a more loving sister to her younger brother. Next to Alicia stands Jackie – no longer seeing Wallace but now a close friend to Veronica. She looks gorgeous as ever, smooth dark skin and beautiful curls.

Veronica looks at her betrothed and glows from every pore. Logan looks taller, more handsome, more chiseled than he did five years earlier. He has grown into maturity, and had become more and more perfect in Veronica’s eyes. She grins at him, unable to control her joy. Dimples appear in her cheeks, flanking the most radiant smile that anyone had ever seen cynical Veronica Mars flash. She winks at her lover, who beams in return.

His chest tightens at the sight of her. He does not think it can be possible that she looks more beautiful than that day five years earlier, when they danced on the beach, when they sealed their love, when they made love for the first time. But she does – her blonde hair falls in loose waves around her shoulders, half put up underneath a Spanish veil. Her eyes sparkle a deep blue, and her lips and cheeks are flush with color. She looks flawless in her simple cream gown, and as she slinks closer to him his heart races with anticipation.

As they reach him, Keith shakes Logan’s hand, entrusting him with his little girl forever.

Veronica clasps hands with Logan, and they stare into each other’s eyes as they proclaim their love for one another, and Cliff unites them for eternity under the trellis of white freesia.

Though she is loathe to tear her eyes away from Logan’s – both wet from the softest of tears – she feels a presence at the wedding on the cliff, one she wasn’t expecting.

Her hands still clutching Logan’s, now with matching platinum rings, she gazes out over the seated guests. Her breath catches as she sees him,standing at the edge of the seats.

He looks content, dressed in a smart navy blue suit. In his hand is a tiny hand, which belongs to a little, doll-like blonde girl, who has put on her best party dress for the occasion.

Veronica catches Duncan’s eye, and he nods. He winks at her, giving her his blessing, and holds up little Lilly’s hand in a slight wave. Veronica smiles a slow, warm smile, and Logan follows the path of her gaze. Seeing his friend, his long-lost friend, he lets out a sigh of relief. Duncan is Duncan again, and he’s happy, and happy for them.

Lilly is beautiful and serene-looking, like her mother.

When Cliff reminds them to kiss, the congregation titters.

Overflowing with love, Veronica Mars-Echolls lifts her face to Logan’s, and their lips meet, under the flowers, under the soft afternoon sun, and before everyone they love.

Nothing Can Compare, Part 6 of 6, R (Logan/Veronica/Duncan)

Tue, 28 Feb 2006 05:03:54 GMT

Title: Nothing Can Compare, Part 6 of 6 (But stay tuned for Epilogue)
Author: rubie_so_ho
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,576
Pairing/Characters: Logan/Veronica/Duncan
Summary: Veronica and Logan face Duncan upon his return.
Spoilers: S1 and 2 so far, then AU
Disclaimer: They belong to Rob. Damn him! (well, I love him, but damn the man, save the empire)
Notes: So this is the last chapter...hope you enjoy. Stay tuned for the Epilogue, OK? It'll be out there soon! :) Thanks for all the good feedback!

Duncan hadn’t said a word when Logan walked out into the living room. He had been sitting there, waiting, waiting for one of them to walk out. Somewhat instinctively, he knew that Logan would be the first one he’d see. He’d hoped this was the way. He wanted to shock Logan, to make him feel physical pain for betraying his best friend, for taking his best friend’s girl. He wanted Logan to feel the kind of pain and guilt that he should have the past spring, when the whole world discovered, along with Duncan, that Logan and Veronica had been carrying on a clandestine relationship.

Duncan had succeeded in his plan. When Logan had exited his bedroom, glass in hand, he had a carefree, spirited grin on his face. He looked happy and in love, and this sickened Duncan. When Logan lifted his eyes, and saw Duncan in the dark before him, Duncan smiled. Logan’s face fell into a gape and the glass slipped from his hand.

Duncan didn’t even watch the glass, but knew that the drop proceeded as if in slow motion. It felt like whole minutes between its slip and the deliberate SMASH on the cold tile floor. Duncan didn’t cringe, didn’t blink, didn’t move when the glass broke in a million pieces on the floor. He smiled inwardly. The worm has turned.

He faintly heard Veronica scramble in the other room, and laughed to himself when he saw her stumble in, crashing into Logan.

Logan remained still, frozen. He looked as though he’d seen a ghost. With the expression painted on his face, Duncan wouldn’t have been surprised if Lilly – the dead Lilly, his irresponsible big sister – sat next to him, in the flesh. This pleased Duncan.

Duncan wanted to be surprised at the turn of events, he really did. He had hoped and prayed in the past months that Veronica hadn’t moved on, and even more so, that Veronica hadn’t gone back to Logan. But he knew, he foresaw, that his hopes and prayers would be dashed and burnt up to hell.

He remained still and calm as Veronica spoke. “Don’t move Logan, you’ll hurt yourself.”

“We wouldn’t want that, now would we?” Duncan intoned, calmly.

He felt her freeze, much has Logan had. She then peered around Logan’s back.

She looked beautiful. Her hair was damp and her tiny, perfect body swam in Logan’s white shirt. Duncan hated her. He wanted to crush her into tiny tiny bits.

Her blue eyes were as big as saucers, and he saw as tears formed in the corner of her eyes.

Good, you cry, you ungrateful, unfeeling whore. He took in a long drag from his cigarette.

He barely heard her as she whispered his name. He didn’t want to hear her. His name sounded dirty when falling from her lips.

He watched her as she turned on her heel, walked back to Logan’s room, and then, moments later, returned, wearing a pair of Logan’s boxers.

“No need to cover up, really. I mean, I’ve already seen the goods.” He spat.

“Whoa, DK, settle down,” Logan finally spoke, his voice shaking. “Let’s just…be rational.”

Ha. This clown, rational? Since when? “Because rational is your forte, isn’t it, Logan?” Duncan had a good handle on shifting between nasty and calm when he spoke. Veronica and Logan were stunned.

That’s right. Daddy’s back. And he’s not the same.

Duncan felt hardened and old, even after only a few months on the run. He’d spent the past months hiding and running, protecting his little girl. They’d been all over Mexico, and down into Central America. They’d been everywhere. Every day and night of the first few weeks, he’d lived in fear. In fear that someone, anyone, would recognize him and snatch Lilly away. After those few weeks, he became sick of fear. His fear grew into realism, which shifted into anger. He jaunted around Central America with a tiny blonde baby strapped to his chest and a sneer on his face. He wasn’t cautious – he was stealth. He became invisible and incognito. All of this for Lilly.

Logan settled into a chair, facing Duncan. Veronica stood, still dumbfounded. Electricity seemed to nip at her fingers, which hung loosely at her sides. Finally, she spoke.

“Duncan. What are you doing here? Where’s Lilly? Is she okay? Are you okay?”
Her voice trembled as she spoke, but there was feeling in her voice, and a hint of concern and love.

“You really seem to care how I’m doing, Veronica.” He inwardly cursed himself for speaking her name. “I can see you’re grieving your loss of me.”

“Listen,” she began, as calmly as possible, “you broke up with me.”

Duncan roared with laughter. “Don’t even…don’t you fucking lie. You think I care anymore what he…” he pointed at Logan, wildly, “thinks happened?!”

“Duncan, I know the breakup wasn’t real,” Logan stated. “Veronica didn’t tell me, she didn’t have to,” he said, answering Duncan’s unspoken next question.

“So…you hit on her, knowing full well that we never really broke up?” Duncan intoned, coolly.

“Duncan. I…We…never thought we’d see you again. You said that there would be no contact, no e-mails, no letters, and no phone calls. I thought it was over,” Veronica stated, trying to match his calmness, and failing miserably.

“Well it wasn’t. Not for me. I came back for you.” He spit out.

“You…came back for me?” She whispered, incredulous.

Logan’s heart sank to his feet, and Duncan could see it in his face. He laughed bitterly.

“Yes. But I should have listened to my gut.”

“Your gut?” Veronica asked, confused.

“My gut told me that you’d trot right back to Logan the moment I left. I should have heeded that feeling.”

“Duncan…it didn’t happen like that.” Logan choked.

“I don’t care how it happened. It happened. You’re together. Right?”

Veronica nodded.

Logan’s heart picked itself off the floor. He looked at her, trying to get a reading. She looked up at him and shook her head softly. She didn’t want him to look at her. She felt awful and guilty and sad.

“That’s what I thought.” Duncan took another long drag and, leaning his head back, blew the smoke up into the air in a vertical column.

“Logan,” Veronica started. “Logan, can you leave me alone with Duncan for a minute?”

Logan looked at her, and squinted his eyes with uncertainty. “Um. Are you sure?”

She nodded again.

Logan nodded in turn, to both of them.

***
When he got up, he felt like he weighed 400 pounds. He slumped over to his room, and shut the door softly. He sat on his bed and stared straight ahead of him for a second. In the next, he fell over into the pillows and he began to cry. He could smell her on his bed, in his sheets, on his pillows. He clutched onto the sheets and inhaled. He worried that this was his last chance to smell her smell, and he was desperate to capture it and imprint it on his brain.

She’s going to leave me. Again. And this time – I’ll never see her again.

***

Veronica sat down next to Duncan, and he couldn’t help but involuntarily shiver.

“Duncan. Where is Lilly? Is she okay?” She asked, concerned.

“She’s okay. She’s with Astrid.” He softened a little when talking about his daughter.

“Astrid?”

“Yeah. No one suspected she was involved, so I called a disposable cell phone she picked up. She emailed me the number at a throwaway email address I’d told her before she left us in Mexico. She had promised to come down any time I needed her, and I wanted her to stay with Lilly when I came back for you.”

“Duncan…” she breathed.

After seeing what he saw on the beach, after hearing what he heard, after hearing her telling Logan she loved him, he just wanted to end her. He wanted to leave the room and never look at her again.

But then she emerged from Logan’s room. He fought to hate her, to despise her for being with Logan. He cursed her inwardly, he vowed to himself to hold steadfast to his newfound hatred of her.

But he still loved her. He couldn’t stop. She was like a disease. And he didn’t want to leave this place, he didn’t want to leave Neptune, without her.

“Listen, I’m willing to forgive and forget this…this…indiscretion,” he hissed the word. “But I want you to come with me. I need you to come with me. To leave with me. Now.”

“Duncan…I…I…”

“Don’t say you can’t. You can. You will.”

Up until this point, she spoke in a soothing voice. She felt badly, felt like she’d betrayed him. But his demanding tone caused her turn 180 degrees. She grew angry and indignant.

“I will? Oh, will I?”

Duncan tried to interrupt. “Veronica—“

“No. I’m speaking now.” This shut him up.

“You listen to me. How can you waltz back in here, without a word, without any sort of warning, and insist that I come with you? Do you expect me to drop my entire life to run?”

“If you loved me, you would.”

“Duncan. I love you. I will always love you. But I cannot give up my entire life, my world, for you. I’m going to college. I have a new family – Alicia, Wallace and Darryl joined my family. I have two jobs. I have…”

“You have Logan.”

She quieted herself. She took in a few large breaths and let them out slowly.

“Yes. I have Logan.”

“You’d give this all up for him.”

“You don’t know that!” She cried, throwing her hands up. “I don’t know that!”

“You would. Because you love him. You’re IN love with him.”

She sighed. She was tired, and didn’t feel like lying. “Yes.”

“You’re not in love with me anymore.”

“Duncan…it’s not that black and white. It’s not that simple.” She was making excuses, and she knew it. She avoided the truth like it was the plague.

“But it is. You can’t be in love with both of us,” Duncan called her out.

She knew it was true. She knew it.

“Duncan. You’re right. But I don’t think you’re in love with me, either.”

“Oh really, oh wise Mars?”

“If you were really in love with me, you wouldn’t be insisting that I leave everything behind to enter a life of crime…a life running from the law.”

“…a life bringing up a baby whose mother you hated?”

“Duncan!” She cried, tears forming in her eyes. “I loved Meg.”

“So did I. So did I. And I left her for you. How stupid was I?” tears formed at the corners of his eyes, when he thought of his love for Meg. Sweet, innocent Meg, who died loving him, loving their baby that she’d never see.

“Duncan, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all of it. I’m sorry about Meg, I’m sorry about the baby, I’m sorry about Logan…” she said, crying. “I never meant to hurt you. But no matter how sorry I am, that doesn’t erase the fact that I can’t leave here.” She wept with sorrow, sorrow for the death of Meg; sorrow for the death of her love with Duncan; and sorrow for the death of a friendship that she saw slipping between her fingers.

“You can’t? Ha. You don’t want to.”

“I can’t and I don’t want to. We…we’re in different places now, Duncan. I haven’t been the girl you loved in a long time. I wanted to be, I tried so hard. I tried to be Miss Yellow Cotton Sundress, Miss Mary Sunshine, just like I was before Lilly died. But…Duncan…I’m not that girl anymore.”

He nodded, and realized something, finally.

“But Meg was.”

“Yes,” she replied, nodding. “Meg was. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry she died, and I’m sorry that the two of you couldn’t raise your daughter together.”

“I’m sorry too, Veronica. I’m sorry too.” Duncan stood up, stubbing his final cigarette in the cup.

Veronica had wanted to say something about the cigarettes, but she knew that this was part of the new Duncan, the Duncan who had been hardened by the road, by running, by being a teenage father, and by losing the true love of his life…Meg.

She looked up at him, and he reached a calloused hand down to her face. “I love you, V.”

She nodded. Tears poured down her face and over his hand.

And without a single word more, he strode across the room, opened the door, and left.

***

Logan had stopped crying long before he heard the front door of the suite slam. He had been wrapping himself up in the sheets, trying hard to pray to a God he’d never prayed to. He looked upwards towards the ceiling, and then recalled something he heard his mother say once about God.

Lynn hadn’t been a spiritual woman, so her comment had been uncharacteristic.

Looking back, Logan realized she’d made the statement just days before her suicide.

She’d said to him, out of the blue, “Logan, do you know what? It always confuses me when people look to the sky when they pray to God. God isn’t in the sky. God’s inside of us.”

At the time, he’d thought she’d gone mental.

Now, he took heed to her words, understanding their meaning. He closed his eyes and looked within himself, and he prayed. He asked for forgiveness for all the wrong he’d done, and vowed to change himself, to be a better person. He told God he would do all these things whether or not he could have Veronica – but that Veronica would be the best reward of all for his transformation.

His eyes flew open when he heard the door slam. He lay still in the bed, afraid to look into the living room. He feared that if he did, he would find an empty room, and an empty life. He cried inside thinking that she could have left him for good this time. He held his breath and squeezed his eyes shut as tightly as possible, and waited.

Veronica tiptoed into Logan’s room, and was puzzled to find Logan in his position. She saw her boyfriend wrapped up in all his sheets like a mummy, and his eyes were squeezed so tightly that his face was turning red. She giggled, in spite of herself, and in spite of the events which had just transpired.

Logan opened one eye at the sound, and peered at her. She smiled at him, and walking over to the bed, quickly slid into the bed next to him.

“Duncan’s gone. I told him I wasn’t leaving. I love you, and only you. I’m here. To stay.” She wrapped one arm around him, snuggling close.

He opened both eyes, relieved and filled with joy. His eyes brimmed with tears again, and he peered down at himself. “Thank you, God. Thank you.”

Veronica looked up at the boy she loved and shook her head softly, confused. She was where she belonged, finally, and she was at peace.

“So…are we going to have ‘the sex’ now or what?” She asked, with mock-seriousness.

“And then some, Miss Mars. And then some.” Logan rolled himself over his love, and quieted her giggling mouth with a kiss.

--
The End… but… Stay tuned for the Epilogue!

WIP: Nothing Can Compare... Part 5 of ?, Hard R (slight NC-17) (Logan/Veronica)

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 01:28:22 GMT

Title: WIP: Nothing Can Compare, Part 5 of ?
author: rubie_so_ho
Rating: Hard R, light NC-17
Word Count: 2,906
Characters/Pairing: L/V...and mystery man
Spoilers: S1 and 2 so far
Disclaimer: They all belong to Robby. Sigh.
Note: I had difficulty with this one. Let me know what you think!!!

On the way to the hotel, Veronica protested a few times as to their destination.

“Maybe you should just take me home. Or, maybe we should find the others, see what they’re doing?” Her voice shook with nervousness, and, refusing to look at him, she stared out the open window. The light evening breeze caught the locks of hair framing her face, and she allowed them to blow haphazardly over her eyes.

“We could,” he said shortly, alternating his gaze between the dark road ahead of him and the tiny blonde within mere inches of him.

Veronica did not answer. She didn’t expect Logan to give up so easily, and she was dumfounded. She continued to stare out the window, and bit her lip with apprehension.

Silent moments passed between them until Logan reached out and, with the very tip of his index finger, brushed a single caressing line down her bare arm. Veronica involuntarily shivered, and felt a light sensation dip from her chest down toward her bellybutton. In truth, she wanted to go home with him, but she was scared beyond all belief.

Zipping his finger back up her arm to her shoulder, Logan then traced the edge of her dress and allowed his hand to rest at the nape of her neck. He began to massage her there softly and slowly with deft fingers.

She dared not visibly react to his touch, but tensed as warmth spread across her abdomen. His fingers moved up the back of her neck and back down. She silently cursed him for sensing the vulnerability of this spot for her. She peered at him from the corner of her eye and saw a plain smile spread over his face as he massaged over the goosebumps forming on her flesh.

It made her slightly angry that he knew his effect over her, but her anger was being won over at the moment by her building desire to have his mouth on hers again.

“Stop the car.” She said, low but clear.

“Huh?” Logan took his hand away from her neck. “Um, okay. Then where are we going? Am I taking you home? Or to meet up with the others?” He began to slow the vehicle down.

“Just stop the car.”

He grew nervous at her insistence, and slowed down further, pulling off the side of the road. There were no businesses in immediate sight, just the beach to the left and some dunes to the right. He stopped the car, and then began to back up to make a three-point turn.

“I didn’t say turn around. I said stop.” She said, calmly.

Logan became uneasy, afraid of the words that would escape her mouth next. He feared that she’d changed her mind, that she wanted nothing to do with him, that she wasn’t prepared to even attempt at giving him a second chance. He stopped the car, and threw the gear into park.

The next thing he knew, the tiny blonde had flown into his lap, and her mouth was on his urgently, her tongue prying between his lips. He let out a breath mixed with relief and wanting through his nose as he wrapped his arms around her. He allowed his fingers to trace the length of her spine down to the small of her back. Pausing at that spot, he applied pressure to bring her closer to him.

Veronica sighed into Logan’s mouth as she felt him pulling her closer. She traced down the expanse of his tongue with hers, and then nipped at his lower lip. She pulled away and looked down, realizing that her legs were tucked uncomfortably between the two of them. In one quick movement, she shifted so that her knees were planted firmly into the bucket seat on either side of Logan’s hips. He again applied pressure to the small of her back, and she slid firmly up against him, pulling at her dress for better purchase.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and resumed kissing him, with such eagerness that it surprised him.

Logan held her head in his right hand, pressing his mouth harder against hers, so their teeth banged up against each other lightly. He then let his left hand drift down her back over the silky satin and gently brushed over the curve of her ass. In response, she pushed up flush against him, and he could feel her warmth against his body.

In the midst of their kisses, Logan snaked a hand up her left side and paused at the curve of her breast. He let his thumb trace the underside, and he felt that she had no bra on. This made him grow hard against her, and, without caution or warning, he smoothed his thumb over her nipple, which felt hard and hot under the satin fabric.

He couldn’t take not touching her flesh one minute longer.

Reaching up, he pulled down the one strap of her dress, exposing her left breast. Her milky white skin shone in the faint moonlight, and he pressed his lips to her collarbone. He felt her shudder beneath him, as she grinded against his lap. He bent down and flicked his tongue over her nipple and she gasped loudly. She put a hand on his chest and pushed away from him.

“What? Are you okay? Am I moving too fast?” Apologies began to tumble from his mouth with profusion.

“I’m okay, Logan, I am. I just need to – catch my breath.” She smiled easily at him, and clutched his hand in hers, squeezing it in assurance.

“Want me to take you home?” Logan asked, wanting to appear a gentleman but praying that she’d say no.

“No, no…” He let out a small sigh of relief as she shook her head. “Let’s go to the Grand. I just want…I want to be close to you.”

He touched his forehead to hers gratefully and helped her back into her seat.

“Well then. Hi yo, Silver, away!” And with that, he peeled back onto the highway.

“Don’t you mean hi yo, ‘Big Bird,’ away?”

“Hush woman. Don’t talk about my precious like that.”

Veronica’s giggles floated out of the Xterra’s open windows and went aloft onto the night air.

***

As he watched the Xterra pull away, he flipped on the headlights of his black SUV. He couldn’t see what had gone on in the stopped vehicle, but had a pretty good idea. He didn’t bother to follow too closely behind them. He knew their destination.

He flicked his cigarette out the open window, and drove onto the highway.

***

As they entered the suite, Veronica pushed Logan into the main room and onto the white leather couch. Sitting atop him, she peppered his face with little kisses until she grew breathless. Resting her chin on his chest, she settled along the length of his body, looking into his eyes. He propped his head up to get a better look at her, smiling at his fortune of having her there with him. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged tightly, afraid that if he let go, she would disappear as though a part of some unreal dream. She began to blink more slowly, her lids heavy from the long day.

“You’re sleepy, Mars.” He smoothed her hair, which was still somewhat grimy from the sand.

“Mm. No. I’m fine.” She wriggled up closer to his face to plant a kiss on his nose.

“No, you’re sleepy.” He laughed, patting her head.

“Maybe…” she yawned. “Maybe a leeeetle bit.”

He sat up slowly, keeping her in his arms. “Come on. We’re going to get you bathed and ready for bed.”

“No Logan – I want to – I wanna…” She struggled to find the appropriate words. “Let’s fool around.”

“Ah, Lady Mars. So eloquent. So romantic.” He shifted further, pulling her into position so he could lift her fully off the couch.

“Mm. Want to…makey outey,” she mumbled into his neck.

He chuckled heartily. “Allrighty. Later.” He carried her into his bathroom and ordered her to undress. “I’ll be in the other room.” He reached forward and turned the hot water on. He pointed her to the soap and shampoo, and laid out towels and a robe for her.

Logan walked into his bedroom and stripped down to his boxers. Grabbing his own robe, he walked into Duncan’s former shower to shower himself. The hot water felt good against his skin, and he stood under the warm stream for a long time. The day had been long and eventful, and he, too, was settling into tiredness.

Veronica roused a little in the shower, and felt good to get clean. She slowly washed the sand out of her hair and rinsed thoroughly. After getting out and drying herself off, she hung her satin dress on a hanger she found in the bathroom closet. She padded into Logan’s bedroom, and, hearing the other shower going, took it upon herself to find something to wear. Reaching into one of Logan’s drawers, she found an old white button-down which had a few buttons missing. She slipped it on, and buttoned the few remaining buttons in the center of the shirt.

Logan emerged from Duncan’s shower and, after drying off, slipped back into his boxers and walked back to his room, drying his hair. When he entered, he came upon Veronica, laying on his bed.

She looked so enticing… her damp hair hung loosely about her face, and her skin shone with cleanness. The shirt she’d put on buttoned slightly below her cleavage, revealing the swell of her breasts. From the bottom edge of the shirt, her tiny alabaster legs emerged, crossed neatly at the knees. She smiled at him, and at that, he dropped the towel and all but jumped into the bed next to her.

He leaned down and kissed her sweetly, chastely. She responded in kind, wrapping her arms around his neck. Their kisses were less fervent, less rushed, less urgent than they had been on the beach and in the car. They began to settle into one another, and grew into the idea of being with one another, in the same place, on the same page, for once.

Logan pushed himself back from Veronica and traced the outline of her face with his fingers, moving the damp strands of hair away from her clean, soft visage. Veronica stared back at him with wonder, and murmured his name quietly. She turned her head into his hand and placed small kisses along his palm. Logan exhaled loudly, and, shimmying closer to his love, pressed loving kisses to her eyelids, nose, cheeks, chin, and trailed down her neck. Veronica lazily traced down the back of his neck and down his muscular back with her fingers.

They laid there, grinning like silly children for many minutes, drinking each other in.

***

He pulled the door closed behind him quietly and looked around. The room was clean, immaculate even. This surprised him. He settled onto the couch and waited.

***

Logan allowed his eyes to rest on her soft curves and delicious skin, and he wanted more and more to touch her, to please her. Without breaking his gaze with hers, he reached forward and began to unbutton her shirt. She stared back at him without protest, giving him permission to continue. Between each button he traced a little line down her sternum, her torso, her belly, with one finger. When he was finished, he gently pushed the shirt open to see her, bare before him.

Every curve of Veronica was smooth, white, clean and untouched. There were no bruises, no scars, no imperfections. She was perfect – if she had flaws, he could not see them. He saw a teeny little mole on her side, inches below one breast, and he traced it with his finger. Even this mole was perfect in his eyes.

Veronica continued to stare in his eyes, and would nod when he would touch her in the right places. He reached up to trace the underside of her breast, the toned line down her torso, the dip of her bellybutton. He let his fingers trail further down her stomach, until she placed her hand over his.

“Logan…” she began. “I don’t think I’m ready to have sex with you. Not…just yet. I love you, but, I’m just not ready right now.” She started out sounding hesitant and a little guilty, but rounded off her words sounding confident and sure.

Logan loved her confidence, her independence, and he glowed at her.

“Hey. V. No pressure.” He looked into her eyes, seriously. “You know I want to make love with you, and am eager for that day…but it can wait. I want you to be 100% sure and 100% ready.” She smiled at him, sweetly, grateful for his words. “That being said…” he started, slyly, pinching her one cheek, “I just want to do something for you. I just want you to feel good.” She nodded, as if in understanding. He continued, “You don’t have to do anything for me in return. I just want to do this for you. Can I?”

Veronica nodded again, with slight bashfulness. As self-assured as she was, she didn’t want to appear too eager. They laid on their sides, facing each other. Logan began to kiss her again, easing her lips open with his, with his tongue. Their kisses became quicker, and he devoured her mouth with every sweep of his tongue. Suddenly, he pushed back and, reaching up, placed his middle finger in her mouth. Slipping it over her tongue, he withdrew it slowly, and trailed it down her body and between her legs. She shifted, opening her legs to accommodate him. As he touched her vital spot, she moaned his name against his lips.

***

He lit another cigarette and smoked discreetly, taking long puffs and exhaling in a devastatingly slow manner. He licked his lips in between inhales, and became sleepy in the silence. He was shaken back to life when he heard soft moans coming from behind the closed door. He stopped, his hand freezing mid-air, mid-smoke. At this sound, he stiffened, and sat as still as possible.

The first moans he found familiar, and they tugged at his heart. He felt lonely, and began to realize just how much he’d missed those sounds. He relaxed against the back of the couch, and slumped as he resumed smoking. He smiled in spite of himself, and ran a fingernail against his dry lips.

He was stopped again by a different sound, a new one.

The moans became deeper and more guttural. He sensed more wanting, more urgency, more passion than he had heard before. Than he’d ever heard before.

He gripped the arm of the couch tightly when he heard these unfamiliar noises. His knuckles went white, but he was determined to keep it together. And then, it came.

“Logan,” her voice moaned, through the walls, through the door. “Oh. God. Logan. Oh my God.”

He put his face in his hand, wondering why he was punishing himself by listening to this.

“Logan! Logan! Yes…you are soooo good. You are so so good. Just like that. Don’t stop!”

He wanted to plug his ears, but he knew that’d be ineffectual.

“Oh…Yes! Yes! Oh, God.” There was a long pause. He shifted, and leaned forward to stub out his cigarette in the empty cup on the coffee table.

“Logan. I love you.”

Tears slipped down his face.

***

Logan peered up from between Veronica’s legs after watching her contract and writhe. He smiled at her, pleased to see her expression. A languid smile graced her face and her velvety blue eyes stared down at him through heavy lids. She stretched her arms out to her sides and giggled.

“That. Was. Amazing.”

“Yeah, well, that was the goal.” He kissed up her body and pecked her on the lips.

“Okay, must sleep now.” She blinked wearily, turning toward him, wrapping one leg over his body.

“Wow! You are such a guy!” He laughed into her hair.

“Yeah well, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll have my breakfast ready at 8 a.m. sharp, sugar-bottom.” She smacked his ass playfully.

“Well, will you settle for a glass of water, and right now?” He asked, feeling groggy with sleep himself.

“Yeah, water sounds good.”

Logan jumped off the bed, slipping on his boxers. Leaning forward, he kissed Veronica on the cheek. “I’ll be right back with your Perrier, mademoiselle.”

“Oui oui, garcon.”

Logan picked up his water glass from his night stand and, swinging his door open, headed out into the dark living room.

Veronica was slipping the white shirt back on when she heard a loud SMASH and Logan’s gasp.

She buttoned a few buttons and ran quickly into the darkened room. She subconsciously smelled nicotine and smoke as she ran.

She ran straight into Logan’s back. Righting herself, she looked down, and saw broken shards of glass all around his feet.

“Logan! Don’t step anywhere,” she ordered. “You’ll hurt yourself.”

“We wouldn’t want that, now would we?”

Veronica froze at hearing the masculine voice, a voice not belonging to Logan.

Peering around her lover’s back, she saw the figure, sitting serenely on the white couch, cigarette dangling from his fingers.

She drew in a quick breath, her eyes widening.

“Duncan.”

WIP: Nothing Can Compare, Part 4 of ?, R, (L/V, Ensemble)

Sat, 25 Feb 2006 07:06:26 GMT

Title: WIP: Nothing Can Compare, Part 4 of ?
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,374
Characters/Pairing: L/V, Ensemble
Spoilers: S1 and 2 so far
Disclaimer: They all belong to Robby. Sigh.
Notes: This is not the final chapter. I'm thinking smut for next time. anyone agree?

As the song faded to an end, Veronica broke apart from Logan and, as if breaking from a dream, the expression on her face snapped into a realization.

She had taken a crazy chance when she approached him to dance with her, and her feelings bordered on confusion for a moment. Veronica had no idea what she was feeling, and she opened her mouth to give explanation as Logan stood before her with a question mark painted on his face.

“Logan, I…I. Thanks. Thanks for the…the dance. I…”

“You…?” Logan finished where she left off. She opened her mouth and closed it again, unable to form words or sentences.

“I…I have to dance with my dad.” And with that, she ran through the crowd. Logan watched in amazement as she zig-zagged roughly through the guests, until she arrived before Keith and Alicia. He saw as she forcibly tapped Keith’s shoulder, breaking him from his reverie. She muttered something to him and he smiled, taking his arms away from Alicia and wrapping them around his little girl. The DJ-slash-bandleader saw Daddy and Daughter dancing, and cued up “In My Daughter’s Eyes.” Logan rolled his eyes at the song, and grew more and more frustrated.

Why does she do this? She runs away. She runs away all the time. She ran from my house the night she found the cameras. She ran from me when she assumed I killed Lilly. She ran from me when she discovered I had a gun. She never talks, she just runs.

Angered, Logan stalked back to his table. Veronica watched him, peering over her father’s shoulder as she danced tightly against him. She bit her lip as she witnessed Logan rip a bottle of champagne off the table, a look of anger and sadness tearing up his face. He strode through the tent and out onto the beach, into the dark night. She wanted to pull away from Keith, but knew she had to finish the dance.

The song strained on for what seemed like a million seconds. She counted seconds and minutes in her head, not believing the actual calculations. As soon as the song ended, she kissed Keith on the cheek, and, kicking off the flip-flops she’d worn to dance, ran through the tent and out into the night.

The moon shone faintly above the beach and it did very little for Veronica’s vision. She could see soft reflections from the sliver in the sky and the party behind her on the water, and looked about her wildly. She feared calling out his name, feared that someone would hear her, feared that they’d get the wrong idea.

She wasn’t really sure what the right or wrong ideas were at the moment, but clung to herself, protecting herself.

She didn’t want to get hurt again. Every time she loved someone, she got hurt.

Walking about aimlessly in the sand, she tripped suddenly, and saw a pair of black flip-flops beneath her. Staring out straight ahead, she saw a tall figure by the edge of the water. She saw that he discarded his jacket, and cuffed the sleeves of his shirt to his elbows. His pants were cuffed to his knees, and he waded into the water. He raised the bottle in his right hand to his lips, and chugged heartily for a second. She watched quietly as he wiped his mouth with the back of his left hand.

She approached him from behind, slowly, cautiously, silently. She saw him flinch when he felt her presence. He tipped the bottle to his mouth once again.

She reached out with trembling fingers to touch his back, but retreated at the sound of his voice.

“You had to fucking run again, didn’t you? To one of your men. Ran to Weevil. Ran to Duncan. Ran to Daddy.” He spat, not daring to say her name.

“I…well, I,” she stuttered. “Well who just ran now, huh?”

“I only run when you push me away. You run of your own free will.” Logan bit on every word as it escaped his mouth. He ran his tongue along his lower lip, tasting remnants of the champagne.

Not knowing what to say, she quieted herself. She reached forward and tore the bottle from his hand, and sweeping it to her face, gulped soundly and quickly. The liquid burned a trail down her throat, and, as she threw the bottle from her lips, she coughed gutturally.

Logan didn’t turn as she expected him to. He stared straight ahead into the water, not moving.

She realized now how it must feel to be him. All this time, I’ve acted like I haven’t cared about whether he lived or died, whether he screwed up his life, whether he fucked Kendall or not, or whether he defiled Hannah or not. This is what it’s like to feel like he doesn’t care about me.

At this realization, a huge sob worked its way up her throat and fled from between her lips. She threw her face into her hands and allowed herself to cry bitterly for the first time in a long time…since Duncan left, and before that, since the day Logan almost got himself killed by the Fitzpatricks.

Her sobs reached Logan’s ears and he fought with himself not to look at her. Still, standing there, not responding to her, made him feel awful to the very core. He clenched his fists and held his breath, not wanting to give in.

I always give in. I can’t resist her. God damn her. God damn Veronica Mars.

Squeezing his fists harder, he felt moisture appear at the corners of his eyes.

Fuck you for crying Mars, fuck you.

He turned with that thought, and observed her, tears pouring from between her fingers, her mascara running down her face. Sobs wracked her little frame. Logan, fighting against himself, slowly pulled her hands away from her face with his. She looked up at him, but squeezed her eyes shut, feeling ashamed. He dug into his pocket for his handkerchief, and, dipping it into the ocean water, began wiping her face with it while holding the back of her head with his other hand. When the mascara and tears were dried from her face, he placed his hand on her shoulder and set him away from her shortly, so he could bend down and look her in the eye.

She’d calmed down by this point, but still sniffled and guffawed a few times. “Breathe. Veronica. Breathe.”

She slowed her breath in obedience.

“I…I’m…Christ, Logan. I’m…sorry.” She choked out. “I didn’t mean to leave. I got…scared.”

“And you had to do whatever? I don’t know if I can handle that anymore, Mars.”
His words were stern, but he spoke gently to her, so as not to rattle her.

“No, I just…I just…ran. I admit it, I ran.” She fought to look away from him. She looked at the sand, her toes, the ocean.

“Yep. You ran. You’ve become awfully expert in that regard.”

“Wait, let me finish, Logan.” She cleared her throat, and finally looked him in the eye. “I don’t want to run anymore. I’m done. I’m tired. It’s just…it’s a coping mechanism, you know? I feel like every person I’ve ever loved has left me or disappointed me. I can’t stand it. I can’t take it anymore. I want something real, that I can feel between my hands, something that won’t leave me, won’t escape me…I…”

“Every person you’ve ever loved?”

“Yeah. My mom left. Duncan left. And last summer, you…you disappointed me. You acted like such an idiot. I couldn’t take it. You forced me to leave.”

“I agree.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. I do. But…every person you’ve ever loved?” He asked, again.

“Uh yeah, Logan, did you hear me? Are you going deaf?” She sighed, exasperated.

“You loved me?”

She sucked in a long breath, not realizing the consequence of what she had just said. I never did tell Logan I loved him. That day, in the Xterra, he told me, but I never…the PCHers ruined my moment. Logan looked at her, exptectantly. What do I say? What do I do?

“Um, well…” she trailed off. Oh well, here goes… “Yes.”

Logan exhaled a breath he felt like he’d been holding for 10 months. He’d never known, he’d only hoped.

“And…you’re bringing this up now because…?”

“Well, because I’m trying to put this,” she gestured between the two of them and then back to the party “into perspective. I want to explain why I ran.”

“But you were saying you ran because of people you loved hurting you.”

“Uh, yeah” Um, hello, Logan, duh. Dude, is he listening?

“So. You. Love me. Now?” He spit out, confused, hoping.

Oh dear Jesus. What have I done? Way to betray yourself now, Ms. Mars.

Flustered, she grabbed the bottle from his hand again and took a big swig.

He chuckled loudly, and his laughs rang out against the clear, still night.

“Oh shut up, you, you…jackass.”

Logan couldn’t stop. He laughed till he was doubled over in pain. Tears rolled down his face, and he placed his hands on his knees as he bent forward.

“Stop it!” She yelled, frustrated, angry, embarrassed. “Stop it this second!”

All of a sudden, Logan lifted himself and launched himself against her, pushing her onto the sand. She screeched and wriggled out from under him, pummeling him with her tiny fists. He caught her fists in his hands and continued to laugh uncontrollably. Finally, she started laughing with him, her hands still in his, her laying above him in the sand. They laughed and laughed and she collapsed onto his chest until she couldn’t laugh anymore.

“You ruined my dress, ass. You didn’t know the meaning of ‘death wish’ till this very moment.” She kicked his shin with her bare foot.

Not answering, Logan rolled her over onto the sand and hovered over her. She gasped, and her wide eyes stared back at him in surprise. “Say it,” he said, softly, his breath warm on her face.

“What? Um, what are you talking about?” She began to wriggle beneath him. He caught her face in one hand, and said again, slowly “Say it. Please. Say it.”

She felt trapped, but didn’t want to move. She softened suddenly, and felt all the muscles in her body relax under his tutelage. She felt the champagne start to take hold of her, and her face felt warm. She swallowed the lump in her throat and opened her mouth.

“I…I love you.”

“Again?” He said.

“No, I. I mean yes. No.”

He pressed his forehead against hers and hovered his nose a centimeter over her nose.

“No?”

“No. I mean…I don’t think I ever…I don’t think I ever really stopped,” Veronica breathed. “I just don’t want to be hurt, Lo…”

He stopped her with his mouth, kissing her fervently, pressing her head deep into the sand. She thought about struggling but gave in, and, opening her mouth, pulled his tongue against hers and sucked gently. Before she realized what was happening, they were kissing hungrily and moving against each other. She wrapped one arm around his back and snaked her other hand into his hair. He traced his finger along her jawline and over her collarbone and then back again.

He pulled away from her, and placing his mouth to her ear, he said, firmly, “Veronica. I will never hurt you ever again. I promise I’ve changed for good. I swear to you. I will do everything in my power to make you happy, and to protect you.”

She nodded, slowly. “I want to believe you, I do. I just…I want to see how it goes.”

He bit his lip, disheartened.

“Logan, listen. I know you’re sincere. I’m just being cautious. I can promise you this – you’re the only one I’m thinking of now.”

She reached up and kissed him chastely.

He picked her up off the sand, and brushed the dirt and debris off her dress. “I never told you…you look beautiful tonight.”

She laughed, shaking sand out of her hair. “Yeah, I’m a real beaut.”

“You are,” he stated. Realizing this wasn’t registering with her, he caught her wrist in his hand. “You are. You look amazing. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you all night.”

“The things guys will say to get into a girl’s pants!” she mocked him, running away from him. He caught her from behind, and wrapped his arms around her. Whispering in one ear, he said “Okay, Miss Mars. We’re going home now.”

“To my house?”

“No. To the hotel. And we’re taking that pretty little dress off and getting your dirty little self into the shower.”

She gasped. “Logan! I am not showering with you.”

“Ha! That’s what you think,” and with that, he swept her up into his arms, carrying her to the Xterra.

--

The party had died down, and people filtered into their cars and limos. Keith and Alicia hugged each other as they stepped into a vintage Rolls Royce, rented to them by Cliff.

Wallace and Jackie, Weevil and Carmen, and Mac and Beaver decided amongst the six of them to get a hotel room to party. Wallace peered outside the tent, and saw a tall figure carrying his best friend toward a yellow vehicle. Grinning, he poked Jackie in the side. She looked to where he was looking, and smiled. Their plan had worked.

“And we didn’t have to do a thing, really.”

“We’re so smooth, girl.”

The six of them filed toward the line of cabs waiting in the parking lot.

--

He watched as Logan piled Veronica into the passenger seat of the Xterra. Veronica snaked a hand out and pulled Logan’s face to hers, kissing him softly once, twice, three times. He swallowed as he saw Logan kiss her forehead, tuck her into the car, and shut the door tightly. As the Xterra pulled away from the beach, he slowly took a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and took one out. Placing it to his lips, he lit it with a match, and took a long drag.
--

WIP: Nothing Can Compare, Part 3 of ?, PG-13 (L/V, Ensemble)

Fri, 24 Feb 2006 17:38:44 GMT

Title: WIP: Nothing Can Compare... Part 3 of ?,
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,512
Characters/Pairing: (L/V, Ensemble)
Spoilers: S1 and 2 so far
Disclaimer: All belong to Robby T.!!! Also, song lyrics are from "Dice" By Finley Quaye.
Notes: Feedback is appreciated... This is not the last chapter!!!

As the sun set along the coastline, guests settled into their seats under the large white tent. Some hung around the bar, getting glasses of champagne. Laughter and excited conversation filled the air.

Jackie, tugging Logan’s arm, walked around tables looking for their placecards. Mac, Cassidy, Weevil and Carmen tagged along, laughing at Jackie’s commandeering attitude towards her date.

Logan spun around, shooting his cohorts a dirty look, and then griped, “Jackie. When I signed up for this ‘escort’ thing, I didn’t know tugging me around like your bischon frise was in order.”

“Didn’t you? And, by the way, bischon frises are so last season. I’m all about the puggles now. Jake Gyllenhaal has one.”

“Well, I’m not your – nor anyone else’s – puggle. Stop ruining my Gucci…which you insisted I wear.”

“Fine fine fine. Ah, here’s our table.” Jackie pointed ahead of them, and instructed where everyone was to sit.

Everyone groaned a little that Jackie was acting as social coordinator, but their bad mood was interrupted by a waiter. “Sirs? Madams?” They perked up, and nodded to him. “The best man sends his best wishes,” he stated, producing three bottles of champagne.

“I just remembered why I love Wallace so very very much,” Weevil intoned.

“Okay, I’m not touching that one,” Logan laughed, grabbing one of the bottles. “But the little guy is really starting to grow on me.” He popped the cork easily.

“You do this a lot, don’t you? You, a bottle of Cristal…” Mac began.

“And my nearest and dearest bitches ‘n hos.” Logan sipped the bubbly liquid, a little spilling on his jacket.

Cassidy wiped at the spill. “Don’t even refer to me as your bitch…or your ho, for that matter.”

“Come on, Beav. It’s all love, baby, it’s all love.” Logan tapped his own chest with two fingers.

“Okay,” Jackie began, testily. “If you keep attempting to talk like a homeboy, you are so not my date anymore…”

“Well, in that case, I suggest we all head over to the dance floor later on and drop it like it’s hot.” Logan put on his best thug voice and grinned at Jackie, who rolled her eyes exasperatedly.

“All right, kids, enough. Uncle Weevil’s hungry. Where’s the beef?” Weevil peered around at the waiters and waitresses.

“The bridal party has to be announced, fool,” Jackie said, punching Weevil playfully in the arm.

“Well, the announcin’ better begin. I’m freakin’ starving.”

“You know, Weevs, there’s a trough down the beach and to the right. Can’t miss it,” Logan smirked into his champagne flute, taking a huge sip.

“White boy only knows this because it’s his frequent dining location,” Weevil told the table. Everyone started laughing and instead of keeping up the lively banter, Logan grinned and sipped away at his fizzy concoction.

The six teens sat and began a comfortable conversation, laughing and joking at one another. Mac sipped softly at the champagne and whispered to Cassidy in a cutesy manner. Carmen and Jackie talked about fashion and who they thought was hotter, Jake or Heath. Weevil and Logan traded barbs and discussed how hungry they were both getting.

“Boys and their stomachs,” sighed Jackie.

Suddenly, music cued up and the bandleader spoke into the mic. “Ladies and Gentlemen! I introduce – the Mars/Fennel family!” Keith and Alicia walked into the tent, their eyes aglow only at each other. Keith looked like he’d been crying a little, and the women in the crowd cooed at this. Following the happy couple were Wallace and Veronica, who had Darryl on her hip. Veronica was smiling at her two new brothers, and quietly teased Darryl with words that no one could hear. Darryl put his head in the crook of her shoulder and kissed her on the cheek shyly.

Lucky kid. Logan thought, smiling to himself. It had only been a half hour since he’d seen her, but he was renewed at seeing her again.

As the bridal party settled into their seats at the front of the tent, meals came out and Weevil’s stomach stopped growling. People began to eat and talk as the sun set into the ocean.

***

As dinner wound down, people began to drink more. The kids were exceedingly happy for their bottles of champagne, as the bartender refused to serve them, even after a few produced convincing-looking fake IDs. To their delight, they realized that the same waiter who’d given them champagne early on was on commission from Wallace to replenish them as the night wore on.

“Again, love that kid. I will start making his spirit boxes,” Weevil stated.

“And again, not touching that one.” Logan piped up. Warm with champagne, the teens easily laughed together, all enjoying each other’s company.

“Hey y’all! Enjoying my wedding present?” Wallace sauntered up to them, speaking to all, but looking only at Jackie. He slipped his arm around the back of her seat and looked into her eyes.

They all raised a glass to Wallace and garbled “Yes” and “Thanks, man!” He surveyed them all and chuckled. “Y’all are getting drunk. Behave, check yourself, don’t wreck yourself.”

“Oh, go ahead and wreck yourselves. It’s a party.”

Logan peered up at the familiar voice. Veronica stood next to Wallace, as if out of nowhere, and Logan held his breath for a long moment. Not wanting to look at her eyes, he looked down, and began fiddling with his napkin. The others shouted out their greetings, and Veronica bent down to accept hugs from Mac and Carmen. Cassidy and Weevil told her politely how pretty she looked and she thanked them softly, not wanting to appear eager for praise on her looks. The longer she stood at the edge of their table, the quieter Logan got. He looked shiftily around him, but didn’t look up at her eyes. Occasionally, he would nod and laugh along with the others, but wouldn’t say more than a “yeah” or “totally” or “nah.” And not once did he address or look at Veronica.

Veronica noticed this and became annoyed. Ok, so he shows up to my dad’s wedding, and he doesn’t even speak to me? I was right – total jackass. Her lips tightened into a straight line and she, too, became more quiet.

Noticing the silence of the two, Wallace nudged Jackie and she looked up at him. Behind them, on the dancefloor, the band cued up and couples began to migrate to dance. Wallace gave Jackie a hard look, and she nodded, as if just getting the punchline of a very obvious joke. She grabbed Logan’s arm, demanding, “Okay, date, let’s dance. I believe I want to – what was your phrase - drop it like it’s hot?” Before Logan could protest, or even speak a single word, she yanked him onto the dancefloor, his legs tripping behind him. As they moved away, he glanced back and finally locked eyes with Veronica. True to fashion, upon connecting, her eyes shifted downwards and her face shone in crimson.

Jackie spun Logan around and placed his arms in dancing formation. After a few trippy steps, Logan settled, and eased into a dance. “Wow, you’re a good dancer, Echolls,” Jackie said, surprised.

“Yeah, don’t act so surprised. I took ballroom with my mother.”

“Ah, the rich. So cultured. So refined.”

Logan grinned at her and forgot about Veronica momentarily.

Back at the table, the two remaining couples decided to get up and dance, and as they moved toward the dance floor, Veronica sank into an empty chair. Wallace crouched next to her and put his hand on her arm. “Wallace. I really don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to hear anything about Jackie, about Logan…”

“V,” he interrupted her. “I’m not saying a word. Let’s dance, okay? Come on, after all, you’re my date.”

Veronica peered down at her best friend, relieved. “Yeah, let’s.” She took his hand as he led her out to the floor.

The couples danced to a light, jazzy beat and swayed back and forth while making conversation. Logan took in the sights around him, people-watching. He saw Mac rest her head on Beaver’s shoulder, and noticed that the Beav was whispering in her ear. Mac responded with little nods and smiles, but her eyes remained closed as she rested against her sweetheart. Weevil sashayed by with Carmen, their hips both swaying with the flavor of Latin dance. Every so often, Weevil would dip Carmen and as she laughed, her deep brown eyes would sparkle.

Logan’s eyes rested on Keith and Alicia, wrapped up in each other, dancing more slowly than the other couples, ignoring the beat of the music around them. They appeared to be dancing to a tune only they two could hear. Logan let out a long, protracted sigh as his loneliness began to envelop him again.

Jackie noticed this, and turned around to see what Logan saw. She saw the sweet couples dancing romantically, and she understood. Breaking away from him without a word, she approached the bandleader, who was preparing to take a break. He was setting up DJ equipment to take over for the rest of the evening, and nodded at Jackie’s request.

Jackie returned to her dance partner and he raised one eyebrow at her quizzically. She shook her head and just smiled. Moments later, a quick-paced, familiar song filtered into the crowd and the couples began to move more quickly. Beaver, not knowing how to react to fast music, blanched. He stopped dead in his tracks and his arms hung limp at his sides. Mac stood before him, confused. Seeing his friend’s predicament, Logan went over and, grabbing him around the waist, swung him around. Beaver looked pissed at first, and blushed with embarrassment, but saw over his Logan’s shoulder that Jackie did the same with Mac. The girls laughed wildly and began to twirl each other around.

Veronica and Wallace slinked through the couples, in a mock-tango, pretending to look serious. Wallace whipped a rose off a centerpiece and placed it between his teeth. As they doubled back through their friends, Veronica, giggling, lunged forward and snapped the rose from Wallace with her own teeth. He dipped her low to the ground, practically dropping her, before whipping her back upright.

Carmen prodded Weevil to try some swing dance moves, and the group laughed riotously watching Weevil try to spin Carmen out and back into him.

Logan stood to one side with his small, tittering friend and hung his arm loosely about Beav’s shoulders. Beaver looked gratefully up at Logan for rescuing him from the embarrassment. They surveyed their friends as the group danced together. Mac swooped in and grabbed Veronica from Wallace, and the two girls tried to imitate Weevil and Carmen’s jaunty moves. Hilarity ensued as Veronica tried to pull Mac along the floor underneath and between her legs, so Mac could jump out on the other side in an impressive swing move. Laughter erupted as Mac slid halfway underneath Veronica and stalled, falling back on her back. The boys picked her up and she shook her hair out, unembarrassed at her misstep. Jackie and Wallace mock-grinded on each other, getting low to the floor. Carmen managed to get a few steps down with Weevil, who smiled with glee at his newfound talent.

Beaver, pushed forward by Logan, put his arms around his date and smoothed out her hair, still disheveled from her fall.

Logan stood on the edge of the group, smiling at his friends and their antics. It took a few moments to realize that he was alone again, but he didn’t feel lonely. He felt part of this group. It made him feel flushed with a tepid sort of happiness, happiness he hadn’t felt in a long time.

It took a few more moments for him to realize that on the opposite edge of the group, Veronica stood alone.

She, too, was watching her friends with a smile in her blue eyes. She giggled at Mac, who was exaggeratedly Eskimo-kissing Beaver, and at Beaver, who blushed in return. She nodded curtly to Wallace and Jackie, who seemed wrapped up in one another, and grinned at Weevil, who was still attempting to dance in time with the jaunty tune.

Her smile faltered a little when she felt his eyes on her. She dipped her head low, then, looking up, her eyes big and seeking, she made contact with Logan.

Logan smiled a short smile at her, unsure of how she was feeling, or what she thought.

She felt tempted to scowl at him, or to stomp away. She felt a tug at her heart, though, and didn’t want to cause any more problems. She smiled softly at him, and nodded.

The two of them stood like that for many moments – each on the edge of their laughing group of friends, with what seemed like a wide expanse between the two of them. Logan felt planted in his spot, and didn’t will to move or speak or blink. He couldn’t think. He was waiting, afraid, for the next shoe to drop. Would she curse him out? Tell him to leave the wedding? Hiss that in his circumstances, he should just leave Neptune?

He looked at his feet in shame. Shameful for what, he did not know. He never knew with her. She made him feel unsure of himself, uncertain. She made him doubt every move he’d ever made. She made him uncomfortable….

But in a good way.

…She made his heart beat wildly in his ears. Only a girl such as Veronica Mars could do this to Logan Echolls.

The strains of the next song began.

"I was crying over you"

Logan looked up for a moment, and, as if she flew, Veronica Mars was standing inches in front of him, holding out a tiny hand.

"I am smiling, I think of you"

“Dance with me, Mr. Echolls?”

"Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don’t say farewell…"

He gulped. “Yeah, Mars, yeah.” He wasn’t quite sure what prompted this; what made her approach him. At that very moment, however, he did not care. He took her little hand and pulled her close, like no time had passed, like no one was around. He wrapped his arms around her, and his hands shook as the words of the music filled his ears. He was grateful for her, for this moment.

"Nothing can compare
To when you roll the dice and you swear your love’s for me"

Veronica breathed in a low breath, unsure of what she had just done. It was like some invisible force placed her in front of him. She couldn’t be angry with herself, no matter how much she tried. She knew for some inexplicable reason, she was where she wanted to be.

Veronica rested her head on his chest, not wishing to speak, not wishing for him to speak. Logan cottoned on, and breathed in the silence.

"Nothing can compare
To when you roll the dice and you swear your love’s for me.”

WIP: Nothing Can Compare... Chapter 2 of ?, PG-13 (Logan/Veronica, Ensemble)

Wed, 22 Feb 2006 04:37:22 GMT

Title: WIP: Nothing Can Compare... Chapter 2 of ?
Author: rubie_so_ho
Pairing: Logan/Veronica (eventually), Ensemble
Spoilers: to be safe, S1 and S2 so far
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Wedding day has arrived...
Word Count: 3,363
Disclaimer: They belong to Robby T.!

Note: Okay, people wanted me to continue, and fast. I'm a sucker for that. Unfortunately, I can't continue the next chapter till the weekend! Oops!

Logan hummed softly along with the radio as he tightened his silver-blue tie closely to his neck. Looking in the mirror, he slipped his black Gucci suit jacket on, and, smoothing out the fine Italian wool, stood back to scrutinize himself.

Not bad. Appropriate for a wedding. Dashing, even. He slipped his sunglasses on to get the full effect. There we go. Perfect.

He felt confident for about an iota of a minute. Coming to a hard realization, however, his face fell. He was sure that Veronica would not be happy to see him.

He had been thinking this same thought over and over since the day at Java when Jackie asked him to be her “date.” He kept thinking it was a horrible idea to impede on Veronica’s family on their big day.

He and Veronica hadn’t talked much in the past month. After he had been cleared for Felix Toombs’ murder, and long after he’d dropped the charade he’d had going with Nip/Schmuck’s daughter, Veronica had completely retreated from him. There had been little interaction between the two of them, which was frustrating.

He had thought that once he had been exonerated, she would have been more forthcoming to talk to him, or even acknowledge that he was trying hard to be a better person.

The person that I wanted to be for you, Veronica.

He wasn’t sure what it was – whether it was him, whether it was the wedding plans, or upcoming graduation – which kept her clear of him. When they did see each other, they would snipe a bit at each other, or they would awkwardly exchange niceties about the weather and trivial things like quiz scores and Wallace’s basketball stats.

They were never ones for small talk.

Give me tense griping/pseudo-flirting anytime over talk about the weather.

Logan was incredibly lonely. He still hung out with the Beav and Dick, but he’d retreated back into himself after the murder was solved. It was the first time in years in which he had felt really alone. He often sat in the hotel suite by himself, playing video games or staring at Sports Center. Every so often, he would let his gaze fall upon Duncan’s empty suite. The pillows were propped up ever-so perfectly on the bed, and the sheets were tight and unwrinkled. The suite felt un-lived-in, and cold. While he had never really felt at home at his father’s huge mansion, especially when he was alone, he certainly felt no warmth in the suite.

Every so often Team Casablancas would stop by, or Beav would come around with Mac. Logan and Mac would chat about techie stuff animatedly while Beav would smile on at them, beaming at his new girlfriend. Those visits would eventually wear thin on Logan, though, as he felt like a third wheel. They were in the first months of a new relationship, and were usually all over each other and cooing like pigeons in heat. This grated on Logan’s very last nerve.

But really, he was jealous that they had each other.

He would ask Mac about Veronica, and how she was doing. Mac would say very little; “She’s okay, I think,” or “I don’t really see her much.” This, he believed. Mac was always with the Beaver. They were inseparable, like a set of matching magnets.

Occasionally, Weevil would pop by and they would have a few beers in silence. They were actually civil after all this time – after Lilly, after the night on the bridge, everything – but even now they were painfully aware that they had zero in common, especially after the murder was solved and Logan was cleared. They avoided the only two things they had in common, Veronica and Lilly, because talking about either pained one or both of them. Weevil had never been sure of what to tell Logan about Veronica. She was a mystery, even to him. Their little visits would always end with some sniping, with utterances of “pool boy” or “Paco” and “rich mofo” and “Richie Rich.” It was usually topped off by Weevil stalking off and slamming the door. Till the next time…

Logan was lost in his thoughts when his cell phone rang. He recognized the ring that Jackie had programmed into his phone – “Bootylicious.” He chuckled softly, emerging from his reverie.

“Yo Jackie.”

“Mr. Echolls. Were you thinking of picking me up sometime soon?” Jackie had an edge in her voice. She sounded incredibly inpatient.

Logan let out a long, hard breath. “What am I, your friggin’ chauffer?”

“Well, if the cute little black hat fits…”

Logan squirmed in his expensive suit.

It’s do or die time. Either you’re going or you’re not.

What seemed like whole seconds passed. He looked again at himself in the mirror, and to a picture tucked into the corner of the mirror. It was a newspaper clipping from the past summer. He’d never really looked at it closely, but he had clipped it because it was the only picture of just him and Veronica. He was in the same suit he was presently wearing, with a dazed look in his eye, coming out of the Balboa County Courtroom. Next to him was the petite blonde, in a cute little dress, looking sweet and polished. For the first time, he noticed something as he peered closer. Veronica wasn’t looking at the photographers, or at the floor, or straight ahead. She was gazing up at him. There was a look in her eyes – she looked concerned; she looked like she just wanted to protect him. Her hand was clutched tightly over his, and her other hand was linked in the crook of his arm. Her eyes reflected something else, too…something he couldn’t place.

“Logan? Earth to Logan? Dude, I am so pissed at you…” Jackie faintly said on the other end of the line.

“Yeah. I’m leaving now. Sorry.” Logan snapped the phone shut.

He was finally sure of something, now.

***

Veronica pursed her lips, unnerved at Wallace. “Let’s see if you get the top bunk now, buddy,” she groused to herself. “BFF my ass.”

“Hmm? What’d you say, Veronica?” Alicia peered over her shoulder at her maid of honor as she stepped out of the long white limo.

Veronica stepped out behind Alicia, careful not to step on her dress. “Nothing, Alicia. I was just going over my toast.” She slammed the door shut and paused, looking before her. “Wow, Alicia…” she started. “You do look absolutely stunning.”

Alicia wore a simple white satin dress, which slightly hugged her curves. Tiny white flowers were woven into her dark hair. Against her smooth, dark skin, the white shone brightly, and Veronica thought she looked like an angel. A feeling of pride surged through her – this woman was going to make her father happy for the rest of his life…and the two of them, Veronica, Wallace and Darryl were going to be a family.

Family. For once, I don’t cringe at the thought, Veronica mused.

Her mother had been long gone. The only contact Lianne had sought to make in the past year was to send her signed copy of the divorce papers. When Veronica found the envelope in the mail 3 months ago, she had sighed and dutifully gave them to her father. She knew it was over, and that this was the best for everyone, but a part of her still missed having a mother around.

After she and Wallace had succeeded in bringing Keith and Alicia back together, the pain of missing her mother started to dissipate. The five of them spent more and more time with each other, having fun dinner and game nights. She even allowed herself to cook with Alicia, something she used to do only with her mom. She never felt as though the hole left by her mother’s absence would ever be filled, but the pain was finally dulled… the day that Keith had shown her the brilliant sparkling ring he intended for Alicia, she started to feel contentment that she hadn’t felt in a long time. She immediately gave Keith her blessing.

Alicia gave Veronica a hug and they headed into the tent set up on the beach as a “waiting area” for the bride and her bridal party…which consisted solely of Veronica. Veronica made her way to the edge of the tent with the flap opening and peered out through the open seam. A few guests started to mill around the seating area, and she could see Cliff already at the make-shift altar, going over his “lines” as the officiant.

Aww. Cliffy looks so dapper.

Beyond the chairs and the trellis above Cliff’s head, Veronica looked out to the ocean. The sun was starting to settle low in the sky. Keith and Alicia had wanted to have a sunset wedding with a nighttime reception, all at the beach. As she stared out into the warm orange sky, she felt a small pang of emptiness.

She had her family, finally. She didn’t want to feel like this.

But she did.

After Duncan left, she ignored the emptiness for a long time. She threw herself into solving the bus crash mystery, and as a side project, occasionally helping Weevil and Logan clear Logan’s name for the murder of Felix Toombs… She ignored the loneliness for a long time.

The loneliness had only been punctuated by Logan’s “relationship” with Hannah Griffith. She knew from the start it had been nothing, a scam…but it irked her nonetheless.

Why? Yeah, I don’t know why. I don’t love Logan. I don’t even like him.

She thought hard and long and believed this was true.

It wasn’t like she was hung up on Duncan. A month or so after Duncan left, she realized not only that Duncan did the right thing by leaving with baby Lilly, but that they were better off apart. She loved Duncan – he was her first love. But things had not been right between them for a long time, even before Meg died, even before Lilly was born. The girl Duncan loved was a girl she could not be anymore, and the girl she was now was not in love with Duncan Kane.

Maybe I’ll really enjoy being single my first year in college

Maybe I can just hook up with random dudes in the library stacks.

Ha. Maybe.

Veronica’s thoughts were interrupted by Alicia. “Veron? Can you help me with my hair? I think some of it is falling out.”

“I have an emergency hair kit, just for this kind of situation,” Veronica said, cheering up. “It’s an easy fix.”

If only everything was.

***

Logan and Jackie sauntered onto the beach and towards the gathering of people they saw ahead of them. Logan was loathsome to be wearing a suit and tie, but glad that the recommended footwear for the occasion was flip-flops. “So, am I rockin’ the beach-chic look?” He struck a fake pose for Jackie.

“Come on, fool. You look fine,” Jackie said, tugging at his arm. She stood on her tiptoes for sight of Wallace.

“Hmph.” Logan surveyed the crowd. He saw some familiar faces – Inga from the Sheriff’s department, Cliff McCormack… Ah, my trusty “if you cannot afford a real lawyer” lawyer. Guess he’s officiating… Whoa, Beav? For real?

He followed Jackie into the throng and approached Cassidy Casablancas. “Yo, Beav…what are you doing here?” Cassidy looked up at him from his chair. “You know, I’m here as Cindy’s guest.”

“Cindy?” Who the hell is Cindy?

“Yeah, you know. Mac? Cindy McKenzie?” Cassidy blushed.

Logan chuckled. “Ahh, Mac. Cool.” He thought it was hilarious how the Beav still blushed at the mere mention of his now not-so-new girlfriend. Hilarious, and a little adorable. “So, can Jackie and I sit with you guys?”

Cassidy scooted over two seats, giving Jackie and Logan the aisle seats. They chatted amiably for a few minutes, the girls complimenting each other on their dresses, and the guys avoiding all talk of fashion altogether. Beav tried to bring up baseball, but Logan shook his head at him for even trying to appear as though he was into sports. Logan ruffled Cassidy’s hair jokingly, offending his smaller friend. Mac and Jackie laughed as Cassidy smoothed down his coif, muttering obscenities at Logan. Logan laughed so hard he started to feel moisture gather at the corner of his eyes.

“I didn’t know you cried at weddings, Richie Rich. How sweet.”

Logan turned at the voice he heard behind him. “Why if it isn’t my favorite Chiquita banana.”

Weevil grimaced at him; “Watch it, killer.”

Logan smiled at his partner in crime. “So, Weevs, come here often?”

“Well, if I knew you’d be here, I wouldn’t have wasted my money on a new suit.”

A feminine voice called out from behind Weevil, “But, aren’t we all lucky you did waste your money? Because you look damn fine, Eli.”

The group turned to see a pretty Latina sauntering up in a soft, peach-colored dress.

Logan’s mouth fell open. Wow, Weevs bagged Carmen? I am so impressed.

Weevil grinned at Logan’s expression. He was proud to be there with Carmen on his arm. He smirked as if to brag a little. Logan rolled his eyes at Weevil, but nonetheless was honestly impressed at his date. Weevil patted Logan on the shoulder and he and Carmen slid into the chairs behind him.

Guests started settling into their seats, and as the crowd began to quiet down, Keith, Wallace and Darryl walked in front of the seats and before the little altar set up. All three wore classy-looking cream-colored suits and crisp white shirts without ties. Wallace held Darryl’s hand and appeared to be whispering to him. The crowd cooed as Darryl bent his head bashfully.

Jackie sat forward in her seat and gave Wallace a tiny wave. Wallace noticed, giving her a little wink. Logan peered at his “date” and smiled. Jackie was beaming, and despite her history of bitchiness and smugness, she positively glowed with happiness.

Logan felt happy for the couples around him, but his feeling of loneliness haunted him. He slunk down in his chair a little bit, biting his lower lip. He looked forward and noticed Keith Mars looking right at him.

Wow. No snake eyes. He must be really happy to be getting married today.

Logan smiled warmly at Keith, in spite of his dull mood, and Keith nodded to him curtly, the corners of his mouth curling slightly upwards. And a smile. Wow. Alicia must be good in bed, too. Okay, bad thought – she’s Wallace’s mom.

The sound of stringed instruments broke out into the air, and a hush fell over the guests. Women’s whispers could be heard, anticipating seeing the bride in her white dress. Logan looked out ahead of him, into the slowly setting sun. The music paired with the scenery was perfect. Despite feeling lonely, a feeling of warmth crept into his body, and he exhaled at the beauty of the scene. Keith was perfectly glowing, and Wallace grinned a wide toothy grin, looking alternately between Keith and Darryl.

They’re going to be a family. Must be nice, Logan thought.

The swells in the music shifted, and everyone turned in their seats. Logan’s eyes traveled along the sandy aisle, until his breath caught in his throat.

***

Veronica stood at the edge of the aisle, smiling at her father who beamed back at her from before the altar. She set her bare right foot forward, and began to step in time to Canon in D. Her face felt warm against the sunset blazing in the distance.

***

Logan slowly exhaled, and drank in the sight of her. Light lavender satin skimmed over her small, soft curves, and it hugged her slightly against the light breeze. Her tiny feet stepped one in front of the other, carefully, slowly, in time with the music. Her smile was sunny and wide, causing soft dimples to appear in her rosy cheeks. Her normally piercing blue eyes looked velvety, accented with subtle makeup. Her blonde hair was piled onto her head in soft ringlets as wispy tendrils fell out at random, kissing the sides of her face, and brushed along the nape of her neck. Nestled in her hair was a solitary white Casablanca lily.

As she made her way down the sand, people whispered to each other, “How beautiful!” and “The Mars girl grew up…”

Logan heard a faint “Wow” behind him from Beaver’s mouth. He then heard Mac slap Beaver’s back.

He couldn’t keep his eyes off her. She seemed to move in slow-motion.

Weevil caught Logan’s stare and playfully punched him in the arm. “Hey, trust fund. Maids of honor don’t usually put out. I’m guessing you’re out of luck tonight.”

Logan didn’t even seem to hear Weevil. He remained entranced by her. Weevil shook his head and uttered a low chuckle.

Wallace caught Logan’s stare as well, from the front of the congregation, and he grinned. Catching Jackie’s eye, he winked at her again. She raised her eyebrows at him conspiratorially, and winked back.

***
Veronica stepped slowly and surely along with the beats of the music. Her eyes shifted slightly from left to right… she felt good that so many people made it out to the wedding. It proved that her dad really did have friends here in Neptune still. She saw Weevil to her right and…

She gulped, seeing Logan. She felt the warmth rise in her cheeks, and then she willed it back down.

Logan smiled to himself when their eyes connected. Veronica looked away, and he saw the look so familiar to him… How she colored one split second and the next – yep, gone.

…It’s still there…

She passed him, her heart beating wildly.

The congregation stood and Alicia made her way down the aisle. She met her groom at the altar, and, as they clasped hands, Cliff’s distinctive voice rang out welcoming the crowd to the union of two families.

Logan missed most of the ceremony, caught up in himself. He felt like a little kid. He was sweating lightly under his suit, and he was fidgeting. A few times Jackie flicked him in the leg with her long nails and waved a long finger at him to behave. He stuck his tongue out at her and resumed staring at Veronica.

Veronica could feel Logan’s eyes on her, and she tried to do a good job at not noticing.

Whatever. Psychotic jackass. I wonder if he came here with Jackie just to taunt me, or to snipe at me. I bet that’s it. He was just looking for some fun. He must be bored, holed up in that hotel suite all alone. Hmph.

She snuck a sly look at him, and Logan, prepared, winked at her.

She rolled her eyes at him and continued watching her dad pledge his undying love for Alicia.

Hmm, how should I take that? Logan wondered. He bit his lip, disconcerted.

“Stop wondering. You guys are retarded for each other.” He thought the voice was in his head, but it was Jackie, leaning close to him, whispering.

“Pssht.”

“Don’t pssht me, white boy.”

“Seriously, Richie. Don’t talk back to homegirl like that,” Weevil intoned, over his left shoulder.

“Dude. Guys. Seriously. Enough. Wedding going on here? If you hadn’t noticed.” Logan shifted uncomfortably in his seat, but grinned to himself over his friend’s words of encouragement.

Veronica heard the small buzz amongst the group, and looked over, interestedly. Again, Logan caught her eye, and this time, she didn’t look away. She didn’t color with embarrassment. She didn’t look cold with disinterest.

For a moment, just a moment, he saw in her eyes what he had seen in the newspaper clipping picture.

…a bit…if only a little bit…of love.

“I now present Mr. and Mrs. Keith and Alicia Mars!”

The crowd erupted with a cheer, and the look was broken.

“Reception time, kids!” Jackie squealed.

Showtime, Logan thought, jazz-handing it from left to right. showtime.

WIP: Nothing Can Compare... PG (for now), Chapter 1 of ? (Logan/Veronica, Ensemble)

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 15:26:22 GMT

Title: Nothing Can Compare...
Author: rubie_so_ho
Pairing: Logan/Veronica (eventually), Ensemble
Spoilers: to be safe, S1 and S2 so far
Rating: PG for now
Summary: Graduation approaches, but the focus is on the wedding event of the season.
Word Count: 2,121
Disclaimer: They belong to Robby T.!

“…but it’s not a date date right?” Logan asked, his right eyebrow cocked. He chewed on his apple slice slowly, inquisitively.

“Right-o, bad boy. You’re just a Wallace stand-in.”

“Okay, never thought I’d hear those words in my entire life,” Logan shook his head and smirked.

“Alrighty, so just to let you know, I’m wearing a blue dress, so I think you should rock the black Gucci suit, white shirt, and silver-blue tie.”

“Omigod! I finally found what I’ve been missing my whole life!” She pursed her lips, and gave him a look that urged him to finish his thought. “A personal stylist! Are you going to give me a mani-pedi next?”

“Yes, Logan, I am. So what’ll it be? French tips or pale pink polish?” Jackie shook her head at him, chuckling.

“French tips. It looks so much more…sophisticated. Maybe that special boy will finally notice me!” Logan batted his eyelashes and put his hand up to his forehead in a mock-swoon.

Jackie picked up her macchiato and sipped slowly. “This should be a fun wedding. Beach-style. I totally approve. I’m sure it will be much more tasteful than the awful Rob-Amber affair.” She started flipping through the latest issue of Cosmo, completely oblivious to Logan’s twitching across the table from her. When she did not hear a peep from him, she looked up, curiously. The boy never shut up, usually, so she had to see what was up. “Logan? You paying attention?”

“Yeah…well, not really. Jackie, you think it’s ok for me to show up at this soiree? I mean, I’m not exactly the Mars family’s golden boy. Won’t security bounce my ass right outta there?” Logan looked slightly worried. As he bit his lower lip, Jackie noticed that he wasn’t really asking the question to her – he wasn’t looking at her. He seemed to be asking the question to the masses; he let it float on the open air. He was looking off past her, and seemed off in a daydream.

“Logan. I completely informed Wallace that you would be my ‘escort.’ He said it was cool.” She smiled to herself, thinking of Wallace. It had been only a week since they had gotten back together, after she had shown him that she was much more into him – and much more cool, sophisticated, and fun - than the flake he’d sported on his arm most of spring semester.

Logan finally fixed his eyes on hers. “So…it’s cool with Wallace…but is it cool with…“ he trailed off, only to be interrupted by Jackie.

“Homeboy. Seriously. (A) Who cares? (B) This isn’t the ‘Mars’ wedding, it’s the ‘Mars/Fennel’ wedding, and (C) last time I checked, Wallace was a Fennel. To be exact,” she intoned in a fake English accent, “the patriarch of the Fennels, if you will.” He gave her an uncertain look. “Come on, besides, she’ll be all busy with her maid-of-honor duties. Maybe she won’t even notice you’re there.”

Logan chewed on this idea for a moment. Veronica not even notice him? He didn’t want to brag, but seriously. Fat chance. No matter whether she liked him or not, no matter whether it was an even-numbered day or an odd-numbered, she would never “not notice him.”

“Uh huh,” Logan muttered. Seeing that Jackie was not in the mood to argue the point further, however, he let it drop. “Okay, Miss Thang. Consider yourself escorted to this fine spring event. And…” he dipped his head low, so no one at Java would hear him admit to this, “I will wear the ensemble you suggested. But no nail-painting. I will retain some of my dignity, just you wait and see!” He stood up and dropped a few bills on the table.

“Sorry to be leaving you, but I gotta check and make sure that Gucci gets to the drycleaners before Saturday.” He bowed before her, with flourish, and a little bit of jazz hands.

“Good sir.” She giggled at him. Jackie had fun hanging out with Logan – it was chill to be around someone who wasn’t so uptight and serious like Veronica all the time, and not wanting to get in her pants 24/7 like Wallace. Logan was a good change of pace, and they had found each other to be good friends.

Logan made his way to the front door of Java when he noticed a tiny blonde entering the side door, throwing up her hands. In one, she held a scrunched-up apron. In the other, her signature messenger bag. It appeared though she was just arriving for work.

“Sorry Carrie, sorry sorry!” She sang out. “I know I was supposed to relieve you of your shift 20 minutes ago. I truly suck. I owe you for life.”

Logan hung by the doorway for a moment just to watch her. She was all sass and fire and sharp edges. He smirked, to himself.

“Totally okay, Veronica. I understand. I know you Marses have a big event to plan for this weekend!” Carrie Bishop rounded the corner, untying her apron as she wiped her hands on it.

“Yeah. It’s been totally crazy. I’ve been running around with my dad or Alicia all week… the apartment is a complete mess! There are favors and menus, and ribbons and lace, and…ahhh! It’s so insane. When I left 10 minutes ago, Dad and Alicia were fighting about whether Backup should be the ring-bearer.”

Logan chuckled to himself. He guessed – correctly – that Keith, not Alicia, wanted the rusty pit bull as a wedding attendant. He snorted, softly, and this alerted both Carrie and Veronica as to his presence. Both girls looked up with interest.

Veronica’s face filled with color, but she quickly composed herself. Logan noticed how she was good at this – she would get nervous around him just for a split second, but then manage to appear cool and collected in the next split second. If he didn’t know her better, he would think that she did not feel an ounce of feeling toward him at all. But he did know better. He may not have understood what exactly those feelings were, but he was wonderfully aware of one thing – she was not indifferent to him, nor could she ever be. He gathered a small sense of pride from this.

Instead of waiting around to trade barbs with her, he gave a little salute. “Ladies.”

He pushed out the door, without looking back to see Veronica’s reaction.

* * *

The last few weeks of high school loomed before the seniors at Neptune High, and most of them were lackadaisical at this point about their schoolwork. The major events lay before them – prom, senior week, graduation – and finals really didn’t seem to matter. It had been a few weeks since the craziness surrounding the bus crash had died down. When the mastermind had been revealed, and taken into custody, the town seemed to breathe a huge sigh of relief that the chaos had been settled. Jackie’s father had been exonerated, and even Veronica felt at peace. She was ready to welcome summer and college with open arms. The tumult which surrounded her teenage years had been a little too much for her to bear. However, she had to admit, even to herself, that because of the events embedded in her life over the past few years, she had grown into a pretty worldly adult. The prospects of college and the “real world” didn’t scare her as they once did; she’d been a part of the “real world” – a world so shocking, lurid, scandalous, and dangerous that she just wanted to settle into a normal life.

Ha. Normal.

She realized, for the first time, that there was no such thing as Normal. It was some lofty ideal. So maybe she wasn’t ready for normal, since it didn’t exist. But she was ready for life outside the hamlet of Neptune – hoping to find something a little less hectic, insane, and wearisome.

It was funny – she knew everything she didn’t want. But she didn’t know what she did want.

One thing she did, absolutely, want was the happiness of her father. She had been worried in the past months what her father would do without her at his beck and call. They were best friends, partners… what would he do, all alone, with only Backup to talk to at dinner time?
This became such a concern of hers that mid-spring she had decided to play Cupid. Well, with the help of her trusty BFF. She and Wallace schemed to get their parents back together. To be frank, it hadn’t taken much prodding. Even though Keith and Alicia were irked that their children were trying to throw them back together, once they were within each other’s companies once again, they couldn’t resist staying together. Keith knew that he wanted to be with Alicia for the rest of his life, and he proposed within a few weeks of their second first date. Veronica couldn’t have been happier. She and Alicia set forth to plan a wedding in May, just in time for the perfect SoCal beach fete.

Veronica rushed in the door, pins and curlers in her hair, one eye made-up and the other still make-up-free. She ran into Alicia’s bedroom to grab more bobby pins and the bottle of hairspray. Music filled the Fennel house – happy, fun music. Veronica and Alicia laughed and squealed and sang along as they got ready. Veronica was pinning up Alicia’s hair into soft barrel curls when Alicia stopped laughing, singing, and talking. She stared at the tiny blonde in the mirror and smiled a warm, motherly smile. Noticing the silence of her BFF’s mom, Veronica looked up at the mirror. “What is it Alicia?”

Alicia grinned at her. “You’re going to be my stepdaughter.”

“Yep. Face it, Alicia. You’re stuck with me. The girl who flashed your son within weeks of knowing him.”

Alicia busted out laughing as her eyes crinkled up with mock-shock and surprise. “What a hussy!” Veronica caught on that her stepmom-to-be was joking and squealed with laughter in reply. “Yes. Total hussy. I’m such a bad influence.” She picked up her cell phone off the sink. Alicia looked at her questioningly. “Oh,” breathed Veronica, “I’m just calling Sheriff Lamb to come cuff me for indecent exposure.” She said this with the most serious voice she could muster, but Alicia’s immediate giggles sent her over the edge. Both women were uncontrollably laughing to the point of tears.

“What the hell. Did you guys eat a big bowl of crazy this morning?” Wallace appeared in the doorway, looking dapper in a cream-colored suit and open-necked white shirt.

Alicia and Veronica dabbed the corners of their eyes, so as to not mess up their makeup. “Nah,” giggled Veronica, “we were just discussing how ‘Wallace Mars’ has a nice ring to it.”

“Aw, helllll no, girl. I think not.” Wallace paused for a moment, and looked at his mom. “Mom…damn! You look great!” Alicia squeezed her son’s hand, happy for the compliment.

“And you look perfect for a beach weddin’!” Veronica said, smoothing one lapel of his jacket.

“Seriously though, V. You shouldn’t expect anything less than perfection. You do recall my jump shot, right?”

Veronica nodded, smiling, applying her eye makeup to even out her complexion.

“Anyway. I was just going to tell y’all I’m heading out with Darryl to meet Keith at the hotel.” He paused, and looked at his feet. “And, uh…you remember that I invited Jackie, right superfly?”

“Yes…” Veronica answered, still concentrating on her eyeliner. “But remember, you’re technically my date, since we’ve got the whole maid-of-honor / best man thing going on.”

“Yeah. I remembered. Trust me, it’s hard to forget when you’ve been talking about it everyday. You’d think you were getting married, based on your Bridezilla act. Anyway…” Wallace trailed off. “Since I can’t be her date, I told Jackie she could bring a date.”

“Uh-huh.” Veronica was more interested in her eyelining duties than Jackie’s pseudo-date.

“And uh, she told me who she was bringing and I told her it was cool.”

“Uh-huh.”

“So yeah. She’s bringing Logan Echolls. Yeah, gotta run, I’ll see you there.” Wallace flew out of the bathroom in a flash and jetted down the stairs. Alicia, sitting on the toilet, looked dumbfounded and slightly confused at what had just happened.

Veronica dropped her eyeliner into the sink.

“WALLACE!” She yelled down the stairs. No answer. She ran out into the hallway and looked out the front window. Wallace and Darryl were in his car, and they sped off, tires squealing.

“That. Little. Sneak.” Veronica mustered, through gritted teeth.

Alicia just grinned, but kept her mouth shut.

***

(Title is from "Dice," by Finley Quaye)

Fic: Witness, NC-17 (Logan/Veronica)

Sun, 19 Feb 2006 18:23:21 GMT

Title: Witness
Author: rubie_so_ho
Word Count: 6,225
Spoilers: S1 and S2 so far
Characters: Logan, Veronica, Keith, Weevil, Aaron, etc.
Summary: It is spring of 2006, and Aaron Echolls' trial begins. Veronica testifies in court, and finds herself drawn to her ex-boyfriend's side once again.
Author’s Notes: I wanted this to be a courtroom drama, but became bored with idea, so I turned it into smut. Hope it's enjoyable! Hee. I would LOVE feedback.
Disclaimer: They belong to Rob, not me. Dammit!

She padded reluctantly to her closet, throwing door open. Surveying her clothes, her lips pursed at the thought of the chore that lay before her. She reached forth and thumbed around for what she was looking for, until her hands found the smart black suit she’d bought for this very occasion. Smoothing her fingers over the soft, light wool, she sighed, and began to slip out of her robe and into the suit.

Veronica observed herself in her mirror. What does one wear when helping the county convict her best friend’s killer? Unfortunately, an ensemble that includes pantyhose. She swallowed when she thought of the task ahead of her. She had been proud – eager, even – when the Balboa County Prosecuting Attorney subpoenaed her to testify at the murder trial of Aaron Echolls. She had anticipated this day for months, and before that, had anticipated finding Lilly Kane’s killer for almost a year. Judgment day had finally arrived, and it found Veronica frightened at the prospect of sending a man to jail for life – or, possibly, to the gas chamber. Frightened. Ha. Tried scared shitless. She nodded at herself in the mirror, and straightened out her blazer.

She headed out into the living room, where Keith sat waiting in his equally sharp-looking suit. Keith was nervously rubbing his hands together, and Veronica sensed that he, too, was not entirely prepared to incriminate the madman that had attempted to take his life and the life of his only daughter. Keith said nothing to Veronica, but felt a small surge of fatherly pride when he caught sight of her. He exhaled a long, slow breath and took her in – she of only eighteen years; she looked like a grownup. His little girl had grown up overnight. It was true, she had been acting like an adult since the day she had sworn off being the 09ers punching bag. But she was still his baby, his only child, until she appeared before him a young woman, who in only a few short months, would leave the protection of his wing to embark on the next chapter of her life.

Keith wordlessly motioned Veronica towards the door, and she wordlessly obeyed. They walked out of the door in tandem, and readied themselves to put Aaron Echolls away for good.

+++

Logan tightened his silver blue tie for the fiftieth time, staring at himself in the mirror. He couldn’t seem to shake the metallic taste in his mouth, and he ran his tongue over his teeth time and time again until it became a second nature to him. Slipping on his black suit jacket, he opened his mouth as if to say something to his reflection, but instead, gulped a large breath of air. He held it for what seemed like only a few seconds, but he began to feel dizzy and stoned. He blew the breath out like a whistle and looked at his feet. Time to lock dear ol’ Dad away for good. Aaron’s gonna look great in prison orange. Paired with his rugged good looks, it’s going to get him a boyfriend real fast. . Logan reached into his drawer and fumbled around for his watch. Pulling the Rolex out, he slapped it over his wrist, and began to snap the clasp shut when he remembered. He turned it over, and read the inscription aloud to himself: “To my son Logan, on his 16th birthday. Love, Dad.” Logan hissed a laugh through his teeth and threw the watch back into the drawer. Slamming the drawer shut, he strode through the hotel suite and out the door. Oh yes, Aaron. Your judgment day is nigh.

+++

Veronica and Keith navigated their way through the paparazzi and press camped outside the Balboa County Courthouse. Veronica laced her fingers through her father’s, and looked down at her feet as he led the way. Just as they approached the door, she lifted her head and observed the majestic building. Its pristine whiteness glared in the morning sun, and she shielded her eyes with her free hand. Keith yanked her through the door, and as it shut behind them, it was quiet, for one moment. For this moment, Veronica was grateful. This was the moment she chose to compose herself. Get it together, Mars. You’re gonna nail this sucker. She and Keith appeared frozen in time for that moment, their feet firmly planted on the marbled floor of the courthouse. The moment shattered when the door opened again behind them, and the shouts of the press raged into their ears. Veronica peered behind her, and saw him enter flanked by two men – one, she presumed, was his lawyer Barry.

As if in slow motion, she watched as he flicked the sunglasses from his eyes. His eyes shifted to the ground for a short moment, and she watched as his lips parted and he let out an exaggerated breath. His eyes shifted upwards and met hers for a brief second. In that one moment, her eyes softened into a look of sorrow; sorrow for him. It wasn’t pity, but concern – even though they’d spent the past eight months at each other’s throats, she was reminded in that moment of what he had suffered in the past few years. His girlfriend had been bashed in the skull by a glass ashtray. His mother had taken a swan dive into the ocean. He learned his father had murdered his first love, only to attempt the murder of his second. He had been accused of murder himself.

Logan was usually loathe to accept anyone feeling badly for him. However, from Veronica, on this day, he appreciated the sentiment. He nodded at her, and at Keith, and brushed by them into the courtroom.

Though Veronica’s mind had been inundated for the past 48 hours with thoughts of this day; of testifying on the stand; of Aaron’s eyes boring into her; of the press, mobbing her outside… But she hadn’t really considered Logan. She tried for a hard moment to capture what it is that he must be thinking. Logan had been pretty awful, in the past and in recent months, but there were reasons behind it. She had hoped time and again that he would get past those reasons and would just be the loving, sweet person she knew lurked behind the obnoxious façade. At the second he passed her in the courtroom hall, however, she excused him his behavior. She only felt for him, and prayed that he would be able to get through this process.

Instinctively, she placed her hand inside Keith’s and they followed Logan and his men into the courtroom. There was limited press allowed in the trial – major anchors from the four main networks, but no cameramen and no photographers. They sat, poised, with laptops booted up and ready to transcribe the events of the day. She looked ahead of her as Logan settled into the first row behind the Prosecution’s table. Behind him sat Dick and Cassidy Casablancas, both looking respectable in their expensive suits. Her breath hitched when her eyes caught sight of Weevil, approaching Logan and the 09ers from the side aisle. This is not the time nor place for the civil war to rage, she thought. She had known, somewhat reflexively, that Weevil would want to be there, to see Aaron receive his comeuppance for defiling and killing the girl he loved.

At that moment, she was shocked and amazed to see Weevil extend his hand to Logan, and to see Logan accept the hand without reservation. Dick and Beav looked at each other with expressions that must have matched Veronica’s, but at that very moment, it seemed as though any war which raged – at least that between the 09ers and Weevil – was assuaged. Veronica smiled in spite of herself, in spite of the tone of the day, and approached them. She untangled her hand from Keith’s and strode quickly to the front of the room. Solidarity, boys? Count me in. She sidled up to them, and Weevil looked interestedly at her over Logan’s shoulder. Seeing Weevil’s expression, Logan whirled around to see the tiny blonde inches before him. Without a single word, Veronica slipped her hand into his, and tugged at him to sit down. Logan complied, but his mouth dropped open a little. Weevil chuckled behind him. She covered their intertwined hands with her other hand, and she looked into his eyes.

“We’re going to get through this. It’s going to be all right.” She cooed, in a soothing voice.

Logan recalled the day in the hotel, when Trina sashayed past them in his mother’s clothes; the day he realized his mother was dead. She had gathered him up in her arms, and cooed to him like he was a child. Normally, he’d be insulted at such an act, but that day, and today, he loved her for it.

He closed his mouth, and nodded at her, still without words. Keith broke the moment and slid in beside Veronica. He expected a look of surprise from Keith at his daughter’s actions, but Keith just smiled simply to him, and looked straight ahead. Weevil settled on the other side of Logan’s entourage as the lawyers and bailiff filed into the room.

Deputy Sacks walked in, his mustache twitching, and through the side door of the courtroom, he pulled the defendant along. Aaron had been permitted to wear a suit to the proceedings, instead of a prison jumpsuit. He looked dashing, as always, but he looked older. A year in prison had posited more lines upon his leathery face, and he appeared tired and worn. Veronica felt Logan’s hand tighten around hers as Aaron’s eyes met his.

Logan felt as though a fire engulfed him, and felt hot under his Armani suit. For a long moment, he and his father stared at each other, until Aaron looked down to the floor, ashamed at his son’s hatred for him. Logan smirked at this, and glanced down at Veronica. He watched her chest rise and fall as her lips pressed together in a thin line.

I just want to protect you.

Logan uttered the first words he’d spoken in hours.

“That bastard is going to pay. For what he did to Lilly. For what he did to your dad. For what he did to you.” He looked at her in earnest, so she knew these words did not come lightly.

She turned away quickly but nodded. She couldn’t look at him in the eye, not now, for she knew if she did, she would cry.

The judge was announced, and she sat high on the bench as the jury was led in.

It began, and for the moments they would spend in that courtroom, the world stopped spinning and time became suspended.

***

Veronica was the first witness called to the stand by the prosecution.

She gulped, and, extracting her hand from Logan’s, made her way up to take her oath.

Her hand felt numb; she’d been holding Logan’s hand through opening jury instructions and the opening statements of both the prosecution and defense.

She took her oath and answered the few slow-pitch questions. “What is your full name? Date of birth? How were you acquainted with Lillian Kane? What was the nature of your relationship with Duncan Kane? What were you doing on the day of Lillian’s death? When did you last see her?”

She settled in, knowing she’d be up there for awhile.

“Why did you and your father, Keith Mars, continue the investigation of Miss Kane’s death long after Abel Koontz had been arrested and jailed?”

“Who did you keep suspect files on?”

And finally, “Okay, Miss Mars. Let us direct our attention to the week leading up to the arrest of Aaron Echolls.”

“Okay,” she breathed.

“Miss Mars, would you please tell the court what occurred at the Echolls residence the evening of May 3, 2005?”

“Yes. Aaron – Mr. Echolls,” she felt a lump rise in her throat as he said his name, “had thrown a surprise party for Logan.”

“Was this Logan’s birthday?” The prosecutor asked.

“Um, no. His father was, I guess, trying to show a sign of good faith…that he wanted to spend more time with his family.”

“And did you attend this party?”

“Yes.”

“Had Mr. Echolls contacted you?”

“No. Um, I had come with Logan. I wasn’t in on the surprise.” Ha, the surprise had been on me too.

“What was the nature of your relationship with Logan Echolls at this time, Miss Mars?”

She paused, and looked confused. Though Logan had looked tense till this point, he chuckled softly under his breath. Keith shot him a warning stare, and he bucked up.

“Well, um, we were sort of dating.”

“Define ‘sort of dating,’ please, Miss Mars.”

“Um.” She looked out at her father, and blushed. “We were hanging out a lot. But…but no one knew about it. We were seeing each other secretly. We were afraid it would hurt some people’s feelings to see us together, so we kept it a secret.”

“Was your relationship sexual in nature?”

“Um, no. We um, we just had kissed a few times.” Okay world, swallow me whole, I want to die.

Keith looked curiously over at Logan, and Logan smirked. Keith rolled his eyes, but laughed inwardly. It was mildly amusing to watch his daughter squirm about Logan on the stand.

“Was there anything you discovered that night which you found to be suspicious?” Okay, I’m no legal scholar, but that was a leading question.

“Well, when I was in the pool house, I found cameras.”

“What were you doing in the pool house?”

Wow, I know this is necessary information, but could this be any. more. embarrassing.

She sighed, and decided that she was sick of feeling embarrassed. She launched right in.

“Logan and I went in there to make out.” Logan grinned. She avoided looking at him, or her father, and began to talk right to the jury.

“Tell us what happened next.”

“We were kissing. Then we were talking for awhile. Logan went into the house to get us something to drink. I sat back on the bed, and happened to look up. In the ceiling fan, there appeared to be a hole in the center. I looked up, and it looked like a camera lens. I looked around, and found a video console hidden in the wall. The cameras were all focused on the bed.”

“What did you do next?”

She drew in a long breath. “I – I freaked out. I left.”

“Why?”

“I thought…I thought that they were Logan’s. The cameras.”

“Did you think Logan Echolls intended on taping you and he getting intimate?”

She looked down at her hands.

“Miss Mars?”

“Yes. Yes, I did.” Logan hung his head. He knew this, he knew her fears back then, and he felt horrible. Right after she told me she trusted me…she thought I was going to tape her.

“Did you later find out who the cameras belonged to? Who was taping the pool house?”

“Yes. Aaron Echolls was.”

“How did you find this out?”

She prattled on about how she wanted to find the letter Logan had written to Lilly. Logan felt ashamed once again, when she told the jury how she originally thought he had killed his first love. He became emboldened, however, when she affirmed that she did not want to believe in his guilt, and sought to find the letter to clear him.

Veronica went on to describe sneaking into the Kane house, running into Duncan, and finding the tapes in Lilly’s air vent.

“What did you see on the tapes?”

“We – Duncan and I – first saw Lilly discovering the cameras, much as I had. Then, we saw them…um…having intercourse.”

“Who?”

“Lilly and Aaron Echolls.”

She looked over at Aaron for the first time and he glared at her. She smoothed her sweaty hands over her skirt, and tugged at the hem. She felt as though he could see right through her clothes to her goosepimpled skin. Veronica shivered, and looked back at the jury.

She told them of what had happened next, how she had driven away from the Kane estate to get help, and how Aaron attacked her and her father.

At the end of her examination, the Prosecutor asked her, “What became of the tapes that depicted Aaron Echolls having sexual intercourse with Lillian Kane?”

“I believe that they were destroyed.”

“By whom?”

“For me to say would be speculative at best.” She swallowed. This was true. She had only heard her father hint that Logan had bought the tapes off Leo and had erased their contents.

The prosecutor nodded, and moved into evidence the existing tapes, so that the jury would see the set up of the cameras.

On the courtroom’s flat screen, the audience could see the pool house. It was night, and the room was fairly dark, though lights from the pool filtered in through the curtains. The next moment, a small light was flicked on, and a figure appeared. Logan. Veronica sighed… she knew what was coming next. She saw Logan’s hands grasping at a small girl with blond pigtails. Oh boy. She dared not look at Logan, at her father, or Aaron. She just watched the video in silence. Her video counterpart reached up to kiss Logan fervently, and both teenagers stumbled back onto the bed. He peeled off her jacket and threw it to the floor.

Veronica sighed in the witness box and closed her eyes. My father is watching a hot and heavy makeout session I had with my ex boyfriend almost a year ago. No, this is fine. This is cool. I’m fine. She snuck a look at her father, who looked pretty pissed, and then looked at Logan, who, under Keith’s stare, was slinking further down in his seat. She smiled softly. Poor Logan.

She turned her attention back to the video. She watched her small self straddle Logan Echolls as they kissed, and talked, and kissed more. She shuddered at the sight of his hands roaming up and down her back as their mouths met over and over with urgency. She crossed her legs tightly at the sight. Okay, now is not the time to get turned on by this. You’re in a courtroom. Your father is right there. This is a public proceeding.

She heard a few snickers and saw Dick Casablancas covering his mouth. She shot him a look and his expression turned serious.

She saw as video Logan stood up from the bed and looked for liquor. She watched him stride to the other side of the bed, and motion for her video self to come over to him. A side angle shot saw Veronica of yesteryear walk on her knees over to her boyfriend, wrap her arms around him, and kiss him soundly on the lips. I looked so…so happy. I looked in love, like Logan could do no wrong. Minutes later, I betrayed him.

The video ended with a shot of Veronica discovering the cameras.

***

After her direct and cross examination, Veronica felt weary and told her father she wanted to go home. Keith nodded, and threw her the keys to his car. She walked over to Logan and placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at her and they held each other’s gaze for a few moments. She squeezed her hand and felt his muscles tense and then relax under her touch. She murmured something about needing to leave, and he nodded curtly. He didn’t expect her to stay; she looked as though someone had punched her in the gut. He looked into her eyes for a long moment, and as she pulled her hand away, he caught it with his hand. “Thank you.” She smiled softly and, retracting her hand slowly, walked down the aisle and out the door.

“The prosecution calls Logan Echolls.”

***

Logan walked into the hotel’s elevator and pressed the “Penthouse” button. As the elevator surged upward, he reached his hand to his neck to loosen his tie. He was tired, worn, and felt dirty. The day had taken so much out of him; he had seen Veronica and Keith testify, and he had testified. It had been a long first day, but the court wanted the trial to move as quickly as possible. He overheard the prosecutor tell Keith Mars they expected to wrap their case the next day, and, based on the defense witness list, they expected the defense to wrap the following day. Logan coughed into the back of his hand and walked off the elevator to his door. He walked into the suite, and shuffled into his room.

He slowly undressed, unbuttoning his shirt buttons one by one, delicately. Slipping the shirt off, he threw it on his bed next to his blazer. He unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, slipped out of his boxer briefs, and padded over to his shower. Turning the hot water on, he leaned his arm against the cold tile and leaned his head against his arm. He stood there, in the water, for what seemed like an eternity. After cleansing away the day, he stepped out and wrapped his towel around his waist. He laid on his bed just like that, with his hair still wet and the towel about his hips. He clasped his hands together neatly, and began to doze.

He stirred when he heard a clicking noise. He heard click click click click outside his door. He leaned up on one arm to peer outside his door when a figure stood in the way.

“I let myself in,” she breathed.

He laid his head back on his pillow and looked at her. At that moment, his eyes welled up with tears and he turned his head away slowly.

Veronica slipped off her high heels and walked over to the side of the bed. He turned back to look up at her, blinking away hot tears. She was still wearing her suit, but it looked rumpled and dirty. Watching where his eyes roamed, she explained, “I went to Dog Beach after I left. I sat there for hours. It was comforting, to watch the waves roll in, and roll out. I thought about Lilly.” He smiled quickly at her, and nodded. She brought one hand up to his cheek and brushed a tear away. He laughed a low, guttural laugh. “Yeah, I am such a baby.” She shook her head from side to side. She raised her knee onto the bed, and nudged him in the side with it. Taking the hint, he shifted over and she sat on the edge of the bed.

Veronica and Logan stared at each other for a few minutes. Everything was still and it felt like all the particles in the air even froze for those few minutes. Veronica broke the silence by lifting her hand and placing it on Logan’s chest. This action caused Logan to speak quickly and loudly.

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’ve been an asshole this whole year. You must hate me.” The word “hate” hissed from between his teeth.

She shook her head. She wanted to put all that behind her, at least for this moment, at least for this night. “Logan…let’s not…let’s not talk about that now.”

“I’m such an idiot, I’m such an ass.” She put a finger to his mouth. She lay down slowly, and put her face on the pillow across from his. They laid like that for a long time, and Logan watched her breathe in and out in measured time. Sleep suddenly overtook Logan, and Veronica soon followed him into the land of nod.

***

Veronica stirred, and looked down at her watch. It was only 1 in the morning, and she and Logan had been sleeping for two hours. She stretched her arms and legs straight out and looked over at Logan. He was sleeping soundly and quietly. She nudged closer to make sure he was breathing, he was so quiet. She looked down at her suit and squirmed in the uncomfortable outfit. She moved quickly and quietly, so as not to wake him, and padded over to his armoire. Opening a drawer with the greatest of care, she pulled out a tee shirt and threw it on the chair. She unbuttoned her blazer and softly set it on the floor, and then drew her shirt over her head. She unzipped the back of her skirt and let it fall to the floor. She reached over to grab the tee shirt she’d pulled out when she heard a small gasp behind her. She whirled around to see Logan, wide awake, staring at her in her bra and panties. She covered herself with the tee shirt and gasped in turn.

“I’m sorry. I just woke up. Oh geez, I’m sorry, I won’t look,” Logan blurted out.

He buried his face in his pillow.

Veronica’s laughter trilled and he lifted his head up. His muscles relaxed when he saw that she found the situation amusing. He grinned at her and shook his head at himself.

Veronica felt comfortable at that moment, and she couldn’t explain to herself why. She pursed her lips and made a sudden decision to drop the tee shirt onto the floor, next to her pile of clothes. Logan looked at her inquisitively, but she ignored this look as she stepped confidently toward the bed and resumed her prior position.

Logan’s breath shook as he looked what was before him. Veronica’s milky white skin shone softly in the moonlight coming in through his blinds. She wore lacy pink panties and a matching bra, and as his eyes surveyed the small curves of her body, he felt warmth rising in his cheeks.

Bolstered by some invisible force, he reached a timid hand out and rested it in the curve of her waist. He began to stroke her side softly, with feather-like touches. All the while, his brown eyes fixed on her blue orbs and he drank in the emotion splayed on her face. He couldn’t read her, but didn’t really want to at that moment. He didn’t want complication, he didn’t want to talk, he just wanted her.

Veronica did not tense at Logan’s touch, but welcomed it wordlessly. She looked over his chest muscles and strong arms and felt her heart begin a quick, staccato beat. She inched closer and closer to his body until they were mere inches apart, and she nuzzled her head underneath his chin. He tightened his arm around her waist, and drew her flush to his chest. He was surprised when she drew her outside leg around his waist to press herself fully against him. She lifted her head and placed a tiny kiss on the edge of his jawline. She swallowed loudly and blushed when she realized he could likely feel her heart beat quickening against his chest. She peered up at him bashfully, and with that look he quickly brought his mouth down upon hers, crushing her lips beneath his. She parted her lips and drew his tongue into her mouth. Her tongue wrapped around his and they began to devour each other’s mouths. He slid a hand underneath her and with both arms wrapped around her, swung her around so she laid on top of him.

Logan still had only the towel wrapped about his hips, and at the movement, the towel came apart and he was laid bare beneath her. Sitting up for a moment, Veronica gasped when she realized he was naked. Her face felt flushed as she dove into the crook between his shoulder and head, embarrassed. He laughed and roughly rolled over so that she was then beneath him. He kissed her flushed cheeks and began to trail light kisses down her neck, past her clavicle, in between her breasts, and down her taut stomach. She squirmed lightly but grew more and more impatient for his kisses and his touch. He began to kiss upwards again, and, settling his face between her small breasts, fingered along the edge of her bra. He looked up at her for guidance, for reassurance, and she nodded at him, licking her lips. He kept his gaze leveled on hers as he placed his mouth hesitantly over her nipple. Her eyes widened and her back arched a little at this motion. He took these as good signs and edged his teeth around the nipple as it grew hard under the touch.

Veronica felt urgency rising within her and it birthed newborn courage. She could not believe what she did next, but her emotions took her head out of the equation. She grabbed Logan’s hand and she placed it between her thighs, over her underwear. His eyes opened and flew up to hers. He moved his mouth onto hers and kissed her hungrily, biting at her lower lip. He moved his fingers deftly over the pink lace, which was already wet. He grew more and more aroused at this, and, encouraged by Veronica’s actions, grabbed her hand and placed it over his swollen penis. She immediately rubbed along the outside of the shaft, and he let out a low moan. He wrestled away from her, and grabbed the edge of her panties and pulled them down. He rubbed his fingers against her, and she began to write at the friction. He bent down and parted her thighs with his wrists, and dipped his head between them. She gasped, and leaned forward. He looked up at her, curiously.

“I’ve never…no one’s ever…I mean…”

She blushed.

“Is it okay? I won’t, if you don’t want me to…”

”I want you to.”

He hesitated, and paused above her. She shyly spread her legs further and further apart, while looking straight into his eyes.

“Now, Logan. I want you to now.”

With that, he bent quickly at his task and, with his tongue flat against her, licked up the seam of her. She cried a little, but wrapped one leg around his shoulders, pulling him closer into her. He circled his tongue around her clit and began to suck, slowly. He would circle, and suck, and circle, and suck. She clutched at him harder and hissed, “faster, Logan, faster.” He was surprised at her boldness, but did not disobey her. He sucked harder and faster until he felt her shudder and contract underneath him. She pulled him upwards and wrapped her arms around him. They laid like that for a moment, and he ran his fingers through her silky, fine hair.

The next thing he knew, she was reaching over the bed to his nightstand. Rummaging through it, she pulled out a condom. “You just knew those were in there, right?” He chuckled. “I had a hunch.” She giggled.

Ripping the packet open slowly, she took out the condom and rolled it over him. Logan growled. He tried rolling over her, but she pushed him down onto the sheets and moved to straddle him. Slowly, she inched down his abdomen, and, grabbing him, slid herself over and around him. He gripped her tiny hips and began to rock with her, slowly. Their pace quickened and he sat up, throwing his arms around her. They sat entwined, looking deeply into one another’s eyes. She rubbed her nose against his and he kissed her eyelids. He picked her up and jumped off the bed in one impressive movement, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He stumbled into his shower with her, and, turning the hot water on for the second time that night, he pushed her up against the tile wall underneath the cascading stream. “What, am I dirty? Do I need a good cleaning?” she asked huskily. “Oh you’re dirty all right.” He began to thrust, harder and deeper into her. She wrapped one arm around his shoulders and placed her other hand against the shower wall. She felt as her back squeaked against the tile. She saw that his one hand was free and she caught it in hers and placed it where their bodies met. He began to massage her there, and, combined with the thrusts, it made her more and more aroused. She felt tension building within her, and she quickly came apart, screaming his name. Feeling the contractions around him, Logan came soon after and they collapsed onto the floor of the shower.

He leaned up against the back tile wall and gathered her into his arms. They sat, with Veronica perched between his legs on the shower floor. They let the water wash over them as they regained composure. Logan eventually stood up, turned off the water, and jumped out of the shower. He grabbed a towel, and, taking her hand, led her out of the shower. She stood before him, shivering, and he wrapped the big fluffy towel around her body. He rubbed the towel all over her, taking time to dry every last inch of her skin. He quickly dried himself off, then led her to the bed. He grabbed a comb from his drawer and began to comb all the knots out of her hair, slowly and deftly. When he was finished, she slipped out of the towel and between the sheets. He slipped in next to her and spooned her from behind. She turned abruptly and bore deep into his eyes.

“Logan, I…” she trailed off. She didn’t quite know what to say. She wasn’t confused, but did not know how to verbalize what she was thinking or feeling.

He nuzzled his nose against her forehead and whispered, “Shh. You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want.” She licked her lips and looked up at him. “That was…that was wonderful,” she choked.

He looked down at her and saw that she was crying. He kissed away her tears and nodded at her. “Just how I knew it would be. Always.”

They wrapped their arms around each other and quickly fell fast asleep.

***
Veronica woke up that morning feeling disoriented. At first, she did not quite know where she was. She looked around and, taking in her surroundings, remembered she was in Logan’s bed, in Logan’s room. Logan was nowhere to be seen. She heard noises from the other room and saw Logan in the kitchen. He was busy in front of the stove. She grinned to herself and decided to take a shower. When she got out, she saw that Logan had brushed the sand off her suit and had pressed it. She slipped back into it, and headed out into the kitchen. At the table were two plates with fancy-looking omelettes and bacon. She gasped, and he smiled when he heard her enter the room. They sat down to breakfast and ate together, smiling at each other and giggling. She did the dishes while he got dressed for court.

Both of them started to feel the overwhelming dread of having to go back to court, but there was something different today. They were reinforced with the feeling that they didn’t have to go through it as solitary beings, but together. They left the hotel and drove to downtown Neptune without a word. Veronica snapped on the radio and hummed along, but they didn’t speak. She flipped open her phone to tell her father she would meet him at court. He didn’t ask where she’d been; he knew.

When they arrived at the courthouse, they emerged from his car, and walked toward the steps, where the throng of paparazzi and press awaited them. Many were shocked to see them together, and began to whisper about the Echolls kid and the Mars girl, side by side.

Logan held out his hand to Veronica, and she took it immediately, as if by reflex. Paparazzos began yelling, “Miss Mars! Are you together with Mr. Echolls now?” “Logan, when did you begin seeing Veronica…again?” “Miss Mars, what about your boyfriend, Duncan Kane?” “Mr. Echolls, what about the rumors that you were seeing Kendall Casablancas?”

Logan put his arm instinctively around Veronica and led her into the courthouse. They walked swiftly into the courtroom, and, still glued to one another, entered as the room fell silent. It’s like his birthday party, all over again, Veronica thought. But she smiled up at him, and he down at her, and they strode confidently down the aisle, slipping into the front row, next to Keith. Keith Mars smiled at his baby girl, and at the man to her right.

“We’re in this together, right Mars?” Logan whispered to her, his breath shaking.

“You bet, Echolls. You’re stuck with me.” She grinned.

He pressed a kiss to her temple and felt at ease. Like this, with her, he felt as though he could withstand anything.

Veronica felt empowered, renewed at Logan’s side. She was ready for this trial, and whatever followed it. Conviction or no, she knew she would be all right.

“All rise.”

Logan and Veronica rose with the rest of the room, and for the first time since Lilly died, they felt happy, and at peace.

Fic: These Empty Hands, Part 2 (L/V, T/V, Weevil, Hannah), R

Fri, 17 Feb 2006 06:35:06 GMT

Title: These Empty Hands, Part 2
Author: rubie_so_ho
Word Count: 6,214
Rating: R - mostly language
Pairing/Characters: Logan/Veronica, Troy/Veronica, Weevil, Hannah
Summary: Veronica deals with the aftermath of her drunken evening. Logan faces an uncertain future.
Spoilers: up to 2x13. Also, slight spoiler of 2x16...after 2x13, though - futurefic.
Disclaimer: they belong to Rob T.!
Notes: This is a second part to my first fic. Comments are appreciated!

These Empty Hands, Part 1

Veronica blinked her eyes slowly, disoriented. Where am I? Why is it so bright? Why does it feel like Wallace and the Neptune High Basketball team are dribbling basketballs on my skull? She groaned, shifting back and forth. Looking about her, her eyes beginning to focus, she saw she was lying in her own bed. Well, thank God for small favors. Certainly an upgrade from a back room at Shelley Pomeroy's. As the heels of her hands sank into the mattress about her, she looked down, realizing she was still fully clothed in the outfit that she'd worn the previous evening. Veronica sighed. I cannot believe I drank that much. At Chez Casablancas, no less. Little Dick will never let this one go. Stretching her legs out to stand on the floor, she moaned loudly. I. am. so. friggin. sore. So THIS is what hungover feels like. She placed her fingers on her throbbing temples and shuffled out to the hallway.

Keith was sitting in his favorite armchair, reading a book while a Sharks hockey game played on the muted television.

"A little early for multitasking, isn't it Dad?" Veronica mumbled, squinting in the light streaming through the front windows of the apartment.

"Ha! Early?" Keith grinned at his one and only daughter. "Check your sun dial, honey. It's nearly 2 p.m."

Veronica groaned, leaning against the kitchen counter. "2? PM?"

"Yes, sleeping beauty. Well, not so much a beauty this fine AFTERNOON. While you are checking your trusty sun dial, you should also check the mirror."

"I don't even want to know."

"Yeah, maybe that's best." Keith winked.

"So...I guess you want to know why I look..." Veronica began.

"And smell..."

"...like ass?" Her shoulders slumped, feeling humiliated. She braced herself for the worst.

"Oh, I know," Keith said, not looking up from his book. "Troy dropped you off. YOU told me you did the night up Lianne-style."

Shit.

Keith chuckled. "It's okay, Ms. Mars. I'm letting you off the hook." She peered at him inquisitively, and he looked up from his book when his words failed to elicit a response. "You were pretty upset last night. You don't deserve to be grounded. At least this time - you get a get free out of jail card."

"Upset?" God dammit, what did I say?

"Yes, honey. After Troy dropped you off, you were muttering something about a Hannah? Oh yes, and rum. Definitely rum." Keith was enjoying this. He could hardly contain his laughter. The mortified look on his daughter's face was his best reward in ages. If Little Dick wasn't going to let this go for a long time, Keith Mars wasn't going to let it go until he was six feet under.

Veronica's toes curled at the mention of Hannah's name. Though she could not remember all that she had said the previous night, she recalled all the faces and images. She vaguely remembered dancing up a storm with Mac on the couch, with Troy and Beaver looking on dotingly. She recalled Wallace and Jane, seemingly laughing at her. Boy, I must have been a showboat last night. She started piecing the events together bit by bit. Jacket. Door. Upside down over Troy's shoulder. Den of sin. Little Dick. Hannah, sleeping. Logan.

Keith watched his daughter's face, as it looked like she was adding complex numbers in her head. Her eyes darted back and forth, as if she was following a play. All of a sudden, he saw a look of dreaded recognition behind her sweet blue eyes. Her cheeks filled with blood, and she slowly slid down the side of the kitchen counter and to the floor.

"Honey?" Keith looked, curious and concerned.

Oh. My. Dear. God.

"Veronica? Earth to Mars?"

Holy fuck.

Keith bent down next to her, and put his hand to her cheek. It burned under his palm. His touch seemed to wake her up, and her eyes snapped to his. "Oh Dad. Hey. Yeah. I'm fine. I need to get ready for....for something. Shower time!" She jumped up like a flash, and ran to the bathroom.

Keith rocked back on his heels, befuddled. His daughter was a complex conundrum. He shook his head, and returned back to his chair, turning up the Sharks game.

+++

Veronica locked the bathroom door, and placed her hands on either side of the pedestal sink. She stared hard at herself in the bathroom mirror, her nose inches from the glass. Her eyes were still tired from sleep, and there were lines on her face from the creases in her sheets. Her hair was askew, and sticking up high in the back. She bored deeply into her own eyes, and her realization had darkened them into a precise midnight blue.

“I told Logan I love him.”

She watched her own mouth form the words, slowly. The syllables dripped like warm molasses and her brain moved in slow motion. She leaned her forehead against the mirror, touching it with its counterpart.

I’m the biggest idiot that ever lived. I’m clueless. I’m hopeless. Logan has a new girlfriend…well, new “girlfriend.” And I just told him I’m in love with him. I want to die.

She lifted her head and looked up to the ceiling. “Dear God, kill me now.”

+++

What seemed like hours – but was only a matter of minutes – later, Veronica was soaking in steaming hot water in the tub. She drew her knees up to her chin and wrapped her arms around her legs. Her damp hair hung in chunky strands around her face, and a few solid tears slipped from her eyes, over her knees and mingled into the tub water. She felt like a fool.

Logan had been awful the weeks before their breakup. The community pool, and various other pranks against the 02ers with his toady friends…she’d had enough. He’d been acting more and more like the obligatory psychotic jackass of yesteryear; the only difference was, he wasn’t a jackass to her. Veronica knew she had made the right decision by breaking up with Logan. She wanted normalcy; she wanted sensitivity. And at the time, Logan’s love just wasn’t enough.

She left Logan, and ran towards normalcy with her eyes closed and her arms wide open. When her eyes reopened, there Duncan was, his strong arms wrapped around her own, shielding her from the world. Things started shifting back to how they were before Lilly died. It was Duncan and Veronica, all butterfly kisses and bear hugs. Sitting in front of the TV cuddling, watching a movie. Having quiet candlelit dinners. It all seemed…perfect. But then it all came crashing down around her ears.

At first, she blamed Duncan. She blamed Meg. She blamed baby Lilly. She blamed Duncan’s secrets and lies.

But now, in her tub, soaking all the hydration out of her body…she blamed herself.

She was so busy trying to be the old Veronica, loving Veronica’s old boyfriend, and living Veronica’s old life.

But I’m not that girl anymore.

She was so busy looking toward normalcy that she didn’t realize what a good thing she’d had.

Logan was a bad influence. Logan was trouble. He was everything that Duncan wasn’t.

But with the bad comes the good. If only Logan grew up, if only he’d stop acting like an ignorant jerk.

I do love him. I have from the moment on the Camelot’s balcony. I’ve never stopped, not once.

But there’s nothing I can do about it.

+++

Logan laid in his bed and looked up on the ceiling, looking at how the brush strokes in the plaster ran into one another. He’d been laying like this for hours; he’d woken up at 11 a.m., stumbled into the suite’s kitchen for a bowl of dry cereal, and toted the bowl with him into his bedroom. He still occupied the smaller bedroom in the suite, although now he lived alone. He couldn’t bear the thought of sleeping in Duncan’s bed. He missed his best friend, and thought of it as a sign of disrespect. On the other hand, it didn’t help that it was the lair of Duncan and Veronica’s lust. Or lack thereof.

Logan felt a tingle run through his chest when he thought of Veronica. He pushed the thought quickly out of his mind, but he knew this move wouldn’t be successful for long. He’d pushed Veronica out of his head about a hundred times before while laying in bed for the past…how many hours?

He lurched over to his right side and peered at his alarm clock. 3:45 p.m. ??? Okay, I’m lazier than I ever thought I could be. And I’m not even hungover.

Though I’m sure Veronica is.

His mind drifted back again to Veronica, inevitably. When he’d arrived home the night before, after dropping a sleepy Hannah off at the House that Liposuction Built, he was still dumbfounded. It had been like a wrecking ball had come out of the oblivion and socked him in his gut. He felt a pain that he could taste like copper in the back of his throat. When he’d come back to the suite, he dropped onto the white leather couch and had stared at the powered-off TV, his mouth twisted in a question mark. When he’d looked down at his cell phone clock, finally, he realized he’d sat in front of the blank screen for 2 hours; it was around 4 o’clock in the morning. Realizing he had to get some sleep, or at least attempt to, he got up to stumble to bed. After a few steps, he froze in his tracks. He stood in front of the open doors of the master suite, and, staring at the pristine pillows on Duncan’s vacant bed, his shoulders fell into a deep slump. He remained still there for a moment, his fingers running along the door joint. Logan slinked off to bed at last, and, despite the million thoughts running through his head, he had fallen fast asleep when his head hit the pillow.

So there Logan laid, Saturday afternoon, his heart beat thumping into his fingertips. He lifted his throbbing digits to his face, and stared.

She’d been right here. In my hands. Right in my grasp. She was like some fiery angel – an aura lit about her face and hair like some inner light trying to escape out, but fire burned within her skin, under my hands. The tears that ran down her face and onto her bitten lip burned sad lines down her face.
She was in. my. hands.

And then – she was gone – with the night, and with Troy. Drunk and sad. Logan laughed at the thought of funny, drunk Veronica. The very next split second, he pouted. She was so beautiful, so wonderful, but… She’s not mine. She hasn’t been, not for a long time.

It’s fine that she said she loves me. Just fine. She’ll wake up today and she’ll have forgotten. It was a fluke.

Logan jumped off his bed and headed into the shower. He had plans to meet Hannah at 6 for a diner out on the town. Can’t be late for the Princess. He turned the water on, and leaned back against the cool tile.

+++

Veronica decided to get out into the fresh air, after her booze headache faded away, with the help of about a gallon of water and four aspirin. She attached Backup’s leash to his collar, threw on her favorite green sweatshirt, and headed out to her car. When she and Backup arrived at Dog Beach, they’d only walked along the edge of the water for fifteen minutes when her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. She took it out, slowly, afraid of who it would be.

Troy.

She sighed and smiled wanly, flipping her phone open. “Hi Troy.”

“And how is my favorite booze hound? How is she?” Troy gushed in a schmoopy voice. Veronica couldn’t help but giggle. Troy sure did seem to retain his sense of humor, despite his twisted past.

“Finally recovered.” She said, shortly. She wasn’t really sure what else to say. She did not recall whether Troy heard her profess her love to Logan; she did not know what she’d said on the ride home. All she had remembered about the ride home was an overwhelming sense of melancholy.

“Good good. Well I wanted to see if you wanted to go out to a late dinner tonight. I’m thinking seafood. Yummmm…” Troy automatically made fish sound appealing.

Veronica felt at first that she shouldn’t go, like she was betraying someone or something. Oh snap out of it, Mars! You don’t even have a boyfriend right now. You’re not betraying jack.

“Sure!” she said brightly.

There was a pause on the other end for a moment, as if Troy couldn’t believe his ears. When he finally realized his good fortune, she could practically see his smile through the telephone. He started to say something, but she was distracted. She looked ahead of her, out toward the shore to the North. She thought she saw a familiar figure, tall and foreboding. She strained to see around the people on the crowded beach, but her short stature prevented her from seeing her focal point. All of a sudden, like a theatre curtain, the crowd parted. It was like a scene from a dream – or was it the past? She refocused her eyes and saw a young man, with broad shoulders and short dark hair. He wore a green sweater and baggy khakis. Her heart surged, looking up toward his face…and then it fell, as she realized she looked into the eyes of a stranger. The young man looked at her in the eye, like she was crazy, and kept walking toward the water line. It looked like him, it did…or maybe I imagined him, like some fucked-up mirage.

“…and so I thought I could pick you up at 8, and you’d better wear something hot. Deali-o?”

Troy’s voice came back to her and she felt guilty. How long had he been talking?

She let a long, low breath slip between her teeth. “That sounds great, Vandegraff. Come by at 8.”

She hung up, and slipped her phone back into her hoodie pocket. She wrapped Backup’s leash one time around her small hand, and tugged him back toward the parking lot.

+++

Logan was on his way to Hannah’s when he remembered he’d promised to call her when he was en route. With his left hand on the steering wheel, he reached into the console of the Xterra for his phone. He dialed the number under “Princess” and furrowed his brow as the phone rang.

Hannah picked up on the third ring. “Hi.” She sounded curt, and quiet. Logan raised one eyebrow. She doesn’t sound like her normal, bubbly self. Hm.

“Hey Fairy Princess. I’m heading over to your house.”

“Okay.”

“You ready?”

“Sure.”

Hannah sounded strange over the phone, but Logan couldn’t pinpoint the emotion in her voice. He couldn’t pinpoint any feeling at all. Ah, women.

He flipped his phone shut after their goodbyes and exited the PCH. After winding through the streets of a mansion-filled neighborhood, he pulled into the Griffiths’ circular driveway and parked. Bouncing out of the car, he strode quickly to the door and rang the bell.

Logan was examining the tip of his shoe when the door swung open. Before he could look up, a hand grasped at his shirt and yanked him into the house, while shutting the door, all in one swift movement.
The same hand shoved Logan up against the door and he felt hot breath against his face.

Why, hello Nip/Schmuck. Nice to see you too.

Dr. Griffith sneered into Logan’s face, and Logan detected the faint scent of bourbon. “You little shit. How fucking dare you? What are you doing with my fucking daughter?”

Logan tried to appear the picture of serene calm. He knew this would have come eventually. He just didn’t realize it would happen so soon. He’d figured that Griffith would stew for a while before bargaining with Logan to keep his little girl’s flower intact in return for a recant about the night on the bridge. Guess he likes himself a little preemptive strike.

Logan allowed his lip to curl into a wicked smile. He peered over Dr. Griffith’s shoulder, attracted by a whimpering sound. Behind Griffith, on the steps, was Hannah. Her tear-streaked face was flushed and blotchy, and she was breathing hard through her mouth. Her lips were trembling, and she looked tired and scared. She uttered not a word, however, and put her head in her hands to avoid looking at Logan.

“Get your fucking dirty hands off of me, you carver,” Logan spat, his teeth inches away from Griffith’s.

Surprisingly, the good doctor backed up, and removed the hand that had been firmly placed on Logan’s chest. Logan spoke up again, as Griffith seemed at a loss for words.

“I didn’t do anything with your daughter. I was just…showing her a good time.” Griffith’s eyes flashed at Logan’s suggestive tone, and he raised his open hand to slap Logan across the face. Logan threw his arm up, and caught Griffith by the wrist. “Grasshopper too slow for kung fu master…” he sneered as his best friend’s words echoed in his mouth. He laughed a low, guttural laugh that resounded in his chest. He felt good, powerful.

Until a hard, graveled voice rang in his ears.

“Well, top of the day to you, son.”

Liam Fitzpatrick stood above Hannah on the stairs, with a gun leveled to Logan’s head.

+++

Veronica was humming along to a song on the radio in Troy’s beemer. “I like this song. It has a good beat.” She started singing a few bars.

Troy grinned at her from the driver’s seat. He looked fresh and clean in dark jeans and a crisp button-down. Her voice floated through the car, and he gasped a little. “Well, who knew Ms. Veronica Mars was a regular Celine Dion?”

Veronica cringed. “Ew. Celine? Are you kidding me? I was going for more of a sultry Joss Stone.” Troy chuckled and her ordinance. “And anyway, you must not have talked to the Tritons lately. They worship the songstress in me.”

“As well they should. Or anything in you. I especially like this finger.” He caught her hand and kissed the tip of her pinky.

Veronica blushed wildly, and felt somewhat uncomfortable. She still felt an attraction to Troy, but her words to Logan resounded in her ears. She smiled nervously, and ducked her head so he wouldn’t see the uncertain look on her face. Troy slowed down the car at that point, and she realized they were at the restaurant. She peered out the window at the warm-looking establishment; there were Christmas lights strung around trellises and votive candles on the outside tables. She smiled to herself and became more relaxed. Oh, forget Logan. Just have fun tonight. They exited the car, and Veronica pressed her palm against Troy’s as they waltzed into the restaurant, as if on a cloud.

As they were getting seated, Veronica felt her phone vibrate against her leg. Slipping her hand into her pocket, she apologized to Troy. “I normally wouldn’t get this, but Dad flew out of town on a last-minute job a few hours ago.” Troy shook his head, and motioned for her to answer. She winked at him and flipped the phone open without looking at the number on the caller ID.

“Hey, Dad.”

“Well hello, little girl.”

Veronica’s eyes clouded over with concern. This was an unfamiliar voice. It was hard, and at the same time, it sounded maniacal.

”Who is this?” Veronica chewed the words out, her voice rising with urgency. “Tell me who this is. Now.”

“It’s your daddy.”

“Right. Who the fuck is this?” Veronica rarely dropped the f-bomb, and Troy knew this. He edged forward in his chair, his chin wrinkled with confusion. His eyes were question marks, and he reached across the table to lay his hand on Veronica’s free hand. Veronica withdrew her hand quickly, and Troy frowned, leaning far back into his chair.

“It doesn’t really matter who I am. I’m just a messenger.”

“Oh yeah, asshole? And what’s your message?” Veronica practically choked on her words.

“Logan Echolls dies tonight. You have a lovely evening.” The phone went dead.

Veronica stared at the table as the bile began to rise in her throat.

+++

Logan gulped. He looked around, but saw nothing. His eyes felt glazed over, like there was a layer of film over them. Isn’t your life supposed to flash before your eyes? he wondered. His breathing became more belabored. He tried hard to think, to squeeze visions of Lilly, his mother, Duncan, Trina into his head. Their faces all ran together, and he couldn’t locate how any of them looked. The most important people in his life, and he couldn’t picture them. All he could see was Veronica. He felt like crying.

Dr. Griffith moved away from Logan and from the door. Hannah remained on the step, curled up against the wall. Logan stared at her, and she looked as though she wanted to melt into the drywall. I don’t blame you, Princess. I would melt away with you if I could.

Liam approached Logan, calculatedly, with the pistol still leveled straight to his head. Logan noticed that Liam didn’t shake the way Logan did the day at the River Stix. He was used to this – he was a hardened criminal. Logan pushed his tongue against his teeth hard, hoping to feel pain. He was completely numb, and felt paralyzed.

“Stupid little rich boy. What did you think was going to happen with the good doctor’s baby girl? Did you think he was going to crumble? Did you forget his formidable connections?” Liam seemed to hiss these last few words, and they slid craftily through his teeth.

“Look man, I’m…I’m sorry. I-I…didn’t think. I just…didn’t think.” Logan shuddered.

“Yeah, you have a long history of that huh? Trying to jump off the Coronado Bridge? Pointing your dinky gun at me in my bar trying to save your little snoop of a girlfriend?”

Logan’s eyes shifted to Hannah’s. She got quiet for a moment, and Logan saw the lightbulb go off in her brain. All of a sudden, he knew she realized his entire plan. I guess your father didn’t fully explain…but he’s such a mensch !

Logan felt a surge of courage. He wasn’t sure what it was; but the last thought that crossed his mind before he spoke was the thought of Veronica, thrown across a pool table, with Liam’s hand clamped around her throat and a tattoo needle buzzing in her ear. The fear in her eyes hit it home.

“Look. You know why I did this. You know. You - you smug bastard - ” he pointed at Griffith, who had been silent for the past few minutes “were not on the bridge the night Felix Toombs was killed. I saw a different guy. And I know you’re wrapped up with these crazy Irish motherfuckers.” His heart beat faster. Wow, I am a poor little rich boy with a death wish. I just insulted my assailant while his gun is pointed right between my eyes. “I don’t really know who’s behind all this, or why, but I know this. I didn’t kill Felix. Griffith was not there. One of you schmucks is setting me up. At this point, I don’t care who, but if I survive tonight, I’m going to make you fucking pay.”

He didn’t know why he was so brash. Yes, I’m crazy. I’m going to die now. This is great.

“You little bitch. You will never get the opportunity. Instead,” Liam grinned a toothy, crazed smile, “you’re going to meet your maker. And you’ll see Mommy and Lilly Kane on the way.”

Liam cocked the pistol, and Logan closed his eyes.

+++

Veronica sat, frozen for a moment. She held her breath.

Troy was wild with confusion and anger. “Who the hell was that? What did they say? Veronica. Veronica!” He walked around the table, grabbed her by the shoulders, and shook her.

She didn’t even look at him. She rose quickly, her napkin falling to the floor. Grabbing her purse, she ran outside. Troy shoved his hand into his back pocket and pulled his wallet out. Throwing bills on the table, he followed after her. By the time he made it outside, she was nowhere to be seen. “What the…?” He shook his head a few times, and blinked, hoping that when he reopened his eyes for the umpteenth time, Veronica would be in front of him, waiting for him.

He turned to the valet boy and asked if he’d seen a small blonde.

“Yeah, she jumped into a cab that was waiting here. Gone – like the wind.”

Troy licked his lips and realized she was gone. He’d lost her completely this time.

+++

Veronica arrived at her apartment complex and immediately slid into the driver’s seat of the Le Baron. She revved her engine and peeled out of the parking lot. Her eyes were sore, and she felt a lump in her throat. She couldn’t think. She just drove. She swerved about, and after nearly cutting a Mack truck off, she slowed down and tried to regain composure. That’s me – calm, cool, and collected. The love of my life is going to die tonight. But I’m Joe Cool.

An idea popped into her head, and she flipped her phone out. Hitting “5” on the speed dial, she sighed loudly. “Come on, come on, come on. Pick up. Pick UP.”

“Yo. You’ve reached Weevil Navarro. Leave one.” The beep rang in her ears. “Fuck it, Weevil, fuck it!” Weevil answered her calls all the time. Why wasn’t he answering now? “When I need a measly part for the Le Baron, you answer. But when I need you to help me save Logan from following Lilly to the grave, you conveniently turn your phone off. Ahhhhhh!” She screamed. She can’t remember the last time she screamed. The sound bounced around in her ribcage. Tears formed in the corner of her eyes. “NO.” she said to herself, in the car. “No. I will not let him die.”
She pulled off the highway sharply. “Time to pay Thumper a visit.”

+++

Logan’s eyes were closed. It felt like minutes had passed, but there were mere milliseconds. All of a sudden, he heard a resounding scream, and his eyes sprang open. He didn’t even hear the shot as it rung out, echoing in the cathedral ceilings of the McMansion. He gasped, and clutched his chest.

His heart was racing in his ears. He could hear it: thud thud thud thud.

Why don’t I feel any pain?

Maybe I’m already dead.

I’m gone, I’m slipping away.

And I didn’t even tell V. that I love her.

Logan looked at Hannah. She looked horrified, her mouth frozen into a large “O.” He began to weep bitterly, looking at the girl he used. Yeah, I’m a fucking idiot. Well, at least I’ve been punished for my misdeeds. He looked down at his chest.

There was no blood.

There were no holes.

He looked up at Hannah again. Her eyes weren’t leveled on him. They were looking at Liam.

Liam Fitzpatrick stood before Logan, his eyes flung wide open. He looked like a cartoon, still, with his eyes bugged out and his mouth twisted in a permanent sneer.

And that’s when Logan saw.

A single drop of blood slip down Liam’s cheek from his left temple.

And then, a gush of blood flowed from that point, and blood began to pour from his mouth.

Logan fell to his knees, saying a silent prayer to God.

His mouth went dry. He looked to his left, and Griffith was curled, cowling in the corner.

Logan swiveled his attention to the right. There, in the doorway between the den and the foyer, stood one Eli Navarro. In his hand was the gun Dick Casablancas, Sr. had given Logan.

Logan exhaled. “Weevil.”

“Echolls.”

Weevil brushed past Hannah, and then Logan. At that moment, as if a gust of wind knocked him over, Liam Fitzpatrick fell to the floor. His chest did not rise with breath. Weevil placed a gloved finger on Liam’s pulse point. He nodded, shortly. Logan swallowed. Liam was dead.

Weevil crossed the room to Griffith. “If you, or your little girl, breathe a word of this to anyone, you will be done. If it gets back to the Fitzpatricks what happened here today, you will wished you never set up a chop-shop in this hellhole of a town.”

This isn’t gonna work. Logan thought. The Fitzpatricks are going to come after Weevil and I and we’ll be deader than dead.

But at that moment, he saw something in Griffith’s eyes. He was staring at his daughter, with fear and love in his eyes. Something snapped in his head, like a rubber band. He peered up at Weevil, and then back at his daughter. “Hannah.” Hannah nodded at the sound of her name. “We’re leaving Neptune. Pack. Now.”

Dr. Tom Griffith had finally had enough of Neptune, he’d had enough of the Fitzpatricks, and he’d had enough of the Felix Toombs murder mystery.

As Hannah climbed the stairs frantically, without looking back at Logan, Tom Griffith told Logan and Weevil who killed Felix Toombs.

+++

Veronica arrived at Thumper’s house. She’d looked him up on her Sidekick. Technology is seriously my lifesaver. Mental note: worship at the temple of the technology gods. Or at least at Mac’s feet.

She rapped on the door with a staccato beat. Her knuckles were cold and white, and she shook from the top of her head to the ends of her toes. He’s not gone yet. You know he’s not. He’s alive.

Thumper appeared at the door.

“Hello, Eduardo,” she spat.

“Hello Miss Veronica Mars. I’m guessing you’ve heard about Logan. You here for some rebound sex?”

Veronica slapped him across the face, soundly, and hard.

“Don’t you fucking say his name, you jackass.”
“Ooh, those are big words for such a little girl.”

“You tell me where he’s at. Or I will end you.”

“He’s burning in hell, with that whore Lilly Kane. He’s gone, chica. Gone like the wind.”

Veronica spun on her heel, not wanting to look in his face.

“Go home, little girl!” Thumper called after her.

In a daze, Veronica drove.

+++

Weevil and Logan sped off in Logan’s Xterra.

“How’d you get here? How’d you know? What the FUCK just happened?” Logan could barely get his words out. He was yelling at the top of his lungs.

“Chill, white boy. Just chill.”

Logan tried to slow his breath. He placed his hand over his hard and pressed hard, as if the pressure would settle his wildly beating heart down.

Weevil unfurled a story to Logan that left Logan speechless.

Tom Griffith had told his daughter about the “murderer” Logan Echolls. He had told her about his history, his father, and the trial that never was. Hannah had railed against him, calling him a liar. She was falling in love with Logan, and cried bitterly that her father just wanted to keep them apart because of his jealousy for anyone she loved besides him. She threatened to run away – she hated his controlling nature and wanted to leave.

In a panic that he would lose his only daughter, Tom Griffith called Liam Fitzpatrick. Griffith told Fitzpatrick that he owed him a favor for incriminating Logan Echolls. “Get him off my back, and no one will be the wiser about Felix’s true killer.”

Liam headed to the Griffith household when he knew Logan would be there – to pick up Hannah for their date. Before embarking on his mission to end Echolls the younger’s life, he called Thumper, and told him the ultimate plan was in motion. They would kill Logan, and then Weevil, and no one would be around on a mission to reveal Felix’s killer.

Ha. Apparently they forgot about Veronica Mars. Logan sighed.

Thumper shared this news with his boys. What he didn’t know was that Hector had never truly defected to his side. Hector was loyal to Weevil, through and through, and upon hearing the news, he warned Weevil of the plan that was underfoot. He picked up Weevil on his bike, and drove him over to the Griffiths’.

“I was just lucky those rich pricks kept their back door unlocked.”

+++

Veronica stumbled into the door, blinded. She hadn’t known where to look, or what to do. Weevil hadn’t picked up his phone. Her dad was out of town and had left his phone on the kitchen table. In deep despair, she had not a clue what to do.

For a moment she considered going to the River Stix, but without backup…or Backup…she knew that would only end in disaster.

She was bewildered, and needed something familiar to her. She flopped onto the bed, and pressed her face into the pillow. She inhaled, and then held her breath. Why does it feel like I’ve been stabbed in my gut? She reached her hand down to her abdomen, and felt nothing there. She recalled feeling this way in the lunchyard the other day, but today it was more pronounced. It was as though someone had shoved a serrated knife deep into her belly and twisted it. She felt impotent, ineffectual.

I couldn’t even save him. I didn’t know what to do. I froze.

She thought back to the last few months. They’d been awful to each other since the breakup, since she got back together with Duncan. I spent all that time acting like I hated him. He died thinking I hated him; he was left with only the mumblings of a drunk girl. He probably did not believe for one moment that I loved him. I’m a fool. I’m a fool, and I’m alone.

Suddenly, sleep overtook her like an assassin. She would later, upon reflection, reason that she fell fast asleep as a defense mechanism. Being awake, thinking about Logan dying, was too much. Her brain and heart were on overload. Like a computer on overload, she shut down.

+++

Logan strode into his hotel suite. He’d talked with Weevil a long time. Although Griffith told them who the killer was, they still had a lot of work to do. They began to plot their next moves. He wasn’t thinking about anything but the murder. He finally was on the path to salvation. He sighed, tired. Practically losing your short life really takes it out of you. What he had gone through today was worth every moment, however.

As soon as I get exonerated, I will prove to her that I’m changed, that I’m not like those toadies.

He pushed his way into his room, and did not bother to turn on the light. Moonlight was softly streaming in through his blinds. He began to unbutton his shirt. One button. Two button.

He looked down at his hands. They were shaking, still. He held them up, and pressed them flat against his closet door, wide apart. He took in a long breath, and closed his eyes. The silence in the room was deafening. He felt cold, and alone. But at least I’m alive. He let the breath out, slowly, and noisily. He wheezed a little.

“Logan?”

He opened his eyes and stared at his hands upon the closet door. He slowly removed them, and looked down at them.

“Logan? Is that you?”

He heard rustling, and heard a click as his bedside lamp snapped on.

He turned his head, his belief completely suspended.

She on his bed, half-sitting up. Her hair fell around her shoulders, and the soft light of the room framed her face.

Fiery angel.

There were tear stains on her face, and he looked to the pillow clenched under her right hand. There were marks which he presumed were mascara streaks.

They stared at each other for a long moment. Both looked as though they couldn’t believe what was before their very eyes.

Veronica parted her lips, as though she wanted to speak, but couldn’t. Her heart hurt. He was there, not five feet away from her, alive.

He’s cheated death. Again.

Wordlessly, she stretched out her left hand toward him.

In a moment within a moment, Logan was in her arms, and she in his. He clutched onto her, not wanting to move, not wanting to let her go.

She pulled back a little, and tilted her face up to meet his. He opened his lips and kissed her like he kissed her the day at the Camelot.

When I fell in love with you, they both thought.

Logan felt the sensation of her warmth under his fingertips.

His hands were no longer empty, but full of her.

Fic: These Empty Hands, Part 1 of ? (L/V, Troy/V, L/Hannah, Wallace, Mac, etc.)

Wed, 15 Feb 2006 07:29:11 GMT

Title: These Empty Hands, Part 1 of ?
Author: rubie_so_ho
Word Count: 6,140
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Hints of L/V; Troy/Veronica, Logan/Hannah, Wallace/Jane, Mac/Beaver
Summary: Troy returns to Neptune as Veronica does him a favor...meanwhile, Logan is charming Nip/Schmuck's daughter.
Spoilers: up to 2x13. Also, slight spoiler of 2x16
Disclaimer: they belong to Rob T.!
Notes: This is my first fic. I've been reading VM fanfic for a few weeks now, and I just started writing today. I haven't written in years...let me know how it goes.

Logan exasperatedly slid into his usual lunch table spot with the usual 09er crew. Rubbing his temples furiously with his fingers, he squinted up at the midday sun. Man, why can’t senior year just be over?

His mood brought on a whole other barrage of questions…
Why can’t this shit with Felix’s murder be over?
Why haven’t Weevil and I found the real killer?
When is Nip/Schmuck going to break? When I defile his only daughter?

“Whoa! Dude! Check out what the cat dragged in!” Dick Casablancas’s voice cut into Logan’s thoughts. Logan, Luke, and a newly-arrived Beaver swiveled their heads around in concert, looking in the direction where Dick was excitedly pointing.

Luke, dropping his sandwich onto his tray, looked incredulous. “Troy…?” He shifted nervously in his seat, thinking back to the steroid fiasco from junior year.

In the near distance, Troy Vandegraff stood, looking high and low, his eyes not settling on the 09er lunch crew practically right in front of him.

Dick mustered a low whistle. “I didn’t think he’d show his face here again, after what he did to Luke…”

“Naw, man…it’s cool. I fucked up too.” Luke sighed quietly. “I totally fucked up. I’m just lucky ’roid rage Charlie didn’t get to me. Well, lucky and completely indebted to Miss Veronica Mars for the rest of my life…”

“Yeah, like you owe Nancy Drew jack.” Dick spat.

This whole exchange found Logan quiet and pensive. What is Vandegraff doing here? I thought he took off to the East Coast, leaving the whole TJ mess, and a certain blonde PI, behind…

“Troy!” Dick shouted. “Vandegraff!” Logan rolled his eyes…This is going to be interesting.

Troy stopped scanning when he heard his name called. Seeing the crew, he smiled a large, conspicuous smile and sauntered over. “Hey! Fellas! What’s the haps?”

So, you’re going to act like nothing happened, like you never left, huh Troy? Logan thought. He didn’t particularly have anything against Troy, nor did he really know him. He vaguely recalled overhearing Veronica, long after the fact, telling Duncan the story behind Troy’s mysterious departure. Something about “drug dealing…let Luke take the heat…Catholic school… Shawna…” but he couldn’t recall any details. He simply recalled the shortness in Veronica’s speech, and remembered thinking she sounded a little annoyed.

“Dude, how was Albuquerque? Are you in college now?” Dick asked.

“Yeah…Albuquerque didn’t so much happen.” Troy quickly moved on. “Yeah. College. I’m enrolled at Hearst.” His eyes quickly shifted to Luke. “Hey Luke…how have you been?” Troy sounded guilty, but was clearly attempting to be friendly.

“Good. Hearst, huh?” Luke said softly, wanting to avoid any conversation about the steroid mess.

“Yeah,” Troy exhaled slowly, looking somewhat relieved. “It’s great. I’m a political science major. I just rushed Sigma Nu.”

“Aww yeah, frat life…how are the honeys? I heard Hearst tail is prime.” Dick said, eagerly. “What’s the scene?”

Troy chuckled at Dick’s very Dick-like response. “Yeah. Hearst girls are pretty. But then again, SoCal girls are the best all-round. Nothing like stuck-up Boston girls…” Troy lifted his head up to peer around again. Logan noted to himself that Troy looked distracted.

“What brings you here, Troy?” Logan piped up finally.

“Hey, Logan…I was really sorry to hear about your dad…” Troy trailed off. He quickly recovered, seeing Logan slump. “but anyway…business meeting.”

“Business meeting?” the boys echoed, bewildered.

“Ha. Yeah…and speaking of which, there she is.” The boys followed Troy’s gaze as he looked across the lunch yard. Their eyes caught the sight of a short blonde, bobbing through the crowd, pigtails swinging, making a beeline to where Wallace Fennel sat alone.

Veronica,Logan thought, and began to seethe.

“So I’ll…uh…catch you guys later…” Troy hurried in the direction the guys were all dumbfoundedly looking. He spun around before crossing the divide. “It was a pleasure as always fellas. But business calls.” He winked, and spun back around, walking…practically skipping, towards his “meeting.”

“What the?! What’s he doing talking to her?” Dick said loudly. “Doesn’t he know she’s damaged goods now?”

“Ahem.” Logan cleared his throat.

“But seriously, dude. She’s like, rich guy kryptonite.”

“Logan!” a sweet voice called out. Logan turned around. Ahh, Princess herself. He smiled brightly, albeit a bit phonily. “Heyyy Princess,” he drawled. Dick raised his eyebrows, and Beaver snickered. Catching his friend’s reactions, Logan shot them a sharp look, and they lowered their heads in mock-shame.

It is such a shame that she’s such a sweetheart. And pretty. Too bad I’ll be taking Daddy dearest down soon.

Hannah bounded up and slid onto the bench next to Logan. He snaked his arm around her tiny waist and laid a chaste kiss on her cheek. He was surprised that his friends were so quiet…and, shockingly, good…around Hannah. They did not know of his plan, but he chalked their saintly behavior up to the fact that they likely wanted their friend to get laid, and not by their stepmother.

Hannah smiled sweetly up at him and sighed. He could tell she was elated to be next to him, to be seen with him. He returned the smile and momentarily forgot about Troy and his business meeting.

+++

Veronica Mars dropped into the seat across from Wallace. “Hello, my fine basketball-phenom-friend. What’s on the menu this fine day?” She looked up ahead and noticed the sun peeking out from the clouds in the February sky.

Wallace shrugged. “Why are you in such a good mood today, supafly?”

“I don’t know,” Veronica crinkled her nose a little at Wallace’s lackadaisical mood. “I just feel like something good’s about to happen. I mean, after all the bad stuff that’s been going on…”

“…like your boyfriend skipping town with Meg’s baby? Like Jackie’s dad getting busted for mass murder? Like our parents breaking up? Like…”

“…I just feel like it can go nowhere but up!” Veronica smiled a very un-Veronica-like smile. She looked…hopeful. She looked…goofy. Wallace shook his head and laughed at his friend’s dreamy look.

“Girl…” he began, chuckling… he stopped short, and drew in a fast breath. Veronica barely noticed. She was trying to figure out where her good mood appeared from.

“Oh girl, I think it can go down. Fast. Think Titanic-like proportions.”

Veronica looked up at her friend, out of her trance. “Huh?” She turned her head, following where Wallace’s eyes were fixed. And she saw him. Troy Vandegraff.

“Oh boy.”

He bounced over, like an eager little puppy. “Miss Sassy herself!” He grinned.

Veronica sighed quietly, but smiled. When Troy re-entered her life a week ago, it was a shock. But to see him waltz back into Neptune High, like he was cock of the walk… it still took her aback. When she promised to help him, to solve his case, she did not expect that he would show up at the school where he’d pissed off some of the elite upper echelon. But – Troy wasn’t exactly predictable.

She looked uneasily over at Wallace, grimacing. She knew she was going to get shit from him for not telling him about Troy. Wallace looked like he’d been smacked in the head with a basketball.

“Hey Fennel! I have been keeping up with your stats – you have had two amazing seasons. I’d love to catch a game sometime!” Troy acted like nothing changed. Veronica found this somewhat annoying, but on the other hand, somewhat endearing. It was like he was in a perpetual perky mood. She started to recall hints of what she saw in him. Before she learned he was a drug dealer. Before he duped her, and Luke, and Duncan… Before he ran back to the East Coast, and to Shawna.

“So, I thought we could have our little business meeting…now. Here.” Troy’s gaze turned serious when his eyes alighted on Veronica’s. She saw in his eyes that he finally noticed she hadn’t said a word yet. Her lips tightened in a thin line and she gestured for him to sit down.

Wallace looked at her knowingly and smirked. Of course she was helping one of her ex-boyfriends. It was her calling card, her m.o. He jumped up and said abruptly, “well kids, I’m off…I’m meeting my special lady friend, showing her how to shoot some hoops!” He faked a jump-shot in the air, spun around, and was off.

Veronica called out “Say hi to Janey for me!” she winced at the sound of her voice. She sounded like a bitchy older sister. Thoughts of Trina Echolls briefly floated into her brain.

She was snapped back to reality by Troy. “Earth to Mars! So, what’s the dirt?”

She interrupted him. “Why did you come here Troy? Couldn’t we have met at my apartment, or my dad’s office, after school?” She had a slightly steely look to her. Troy laid his hand on her arm, and said brightly “I just wanted to revisit some old haunts. See some old friends. See if high school girls are still hot.”

She rolled her eyes, but began to relax. She laughed a little. “So what’s the verdict? Still hot?” She put her hand on one hip and batted her eyes.

“Oh, you have no idea.” He seemed to nudge closer.

She didn’t mind the proximity; she actually welcomed it. She had not really been this close physically to any boy since Duncan left. She shifted her eyes a little when Duncan came to mind. She missed him but there were things left unsaid, problems left unsolved… Duncan was never one for confrontation – unless he was being accused of murder. As much as she’d enjoyed the first few months of their renewed relationship, she felt as though things were never complete. Duncan never spoke up. He never argued. He sometimes did not even seem to feel. Part of her was ready, now that he was gone and she could not hear from him, to admit that Duncan still had the problem of standing idly by. Until he had a daughter.

She smiled at Troy and coughed a little. “Okay. Your case.” They began to talk in hushed tones over her opened laptop. She showed him documents she pulled up from hacking into Hearst’s system. He nodded at her every explanation and sighed a few times. He looked happy just to be in her presence, and to see the look on his face, she thought he could have been looking at an angel.

“You. Are. My lifesaver.” He breathed.

“Well, the case isn’t solved yet, but…I’m getting there. I’ll clear your name, Troy.”

He touched her arm again. “Veronica, how can I ever thank you? I mean, especially all I did to you… I lied to you. I used Luke. I lied to Duncan. I…”

“Troy. I know you’re a different person now. I can’t say I trust you one hundred percent but… I know you mean well. I do.” The kindness Troy had shown her once popping back into her life was astounding. He’d professed his apologies every day for the past seven days, and had offered to go to the moon and back for her helping him with his case.

They had run into each other when Veronica had accompanied Wallace to Hearst’s basketball recruitment weekend. While Wallace schmoozed with the ballers and swooning sorority girls, Troy had told her of his predicament, swore that he was a changed man, began his litany of apologies, and begged for her help.

She’d been feeling generous, it was true. Her thoughts seemed to echo her best friend’s; she had been helping Logan to clear his name for the past few months; she helped keep a promise to her boyfriend’s now-dead ex girlfriend; she had even cleared Jackie’s name following the money box debacle at winter carnival.

Veronica Mars, she’s a marshmallow. Ah, Wallace was right.

Veronica smiled softly at Troy. “Well, you can make it up to me by hanging out with me, Wallace, and Jackie this weekend. I think we’re going to a party over at Beaver’s.”

“You. Are going to Dick’s?” Troy looked at her with incredulity pooling around his blue eyes.

She ducked her head and groaned. “Ugh. Yes. But only because of Beaver, and because Beaver is dating my friend Mac.”

“Beaver has a girlfriend?”

“Oh my friend, you’ve been gone much too long. Think you’ll mind slumming with a bunch of high school kids?”

“I think I’ll manage.” Troy looked up suddenly. “Hmm.” He sounded confused, and a little curious.

“What?” Veronica asked, looking a little confused herself.

“I didn’t realize we had an audience.”

+++

Veronica looked to where Troy was squinting. She began to giggle a little, inwardly. Staring back at them were Dick, Beaver, Luke, and Logan. Sitting next to Logan was a sweet-looking blonde. Hmm. She looks young. So that is Hannah Griffith.

She had learned through Weevil that Logan had begun his little scheme to force Nip/Schmuck to recant his story about the night on the Coronado Bridge. Veronica had sighed, shaking her head at Weevil. “No good will come of this.” But she felt like the situation was out of her hands. She could not stop Logan from using Nip/Schmuck’s daughter. She pitied the poor girl. I know what it’s like to fall for Logan Echolls. And I know what it’s like when it all comes crashing down.

Despite her frustration at the situation, she decided not to let her anger show. She hoped for Logan’s sake that he would clear his name, but at the same time, a little part of her hoped his hare-brained scheme would bite him in the ass.

+++

Veronica narrowed her eyes at the 09ers and Troy stifled a chuckle. Realizing they were caught, the boys looked around, sheepishly. Beaver hopped up from the table in search of Mac while Dick suddenly became engrossed in his macaroni and cheese. Luke began flipping through his biology book. Logan turned his attention toward the blonde to his right, trying to ignore the blonde across the lunch yard. He stole a glance back at Veronica Mars, and their eyes locked for a moment. She looked down, quickly, and then over at Troy, laughing along with him, but not sure what he was laughing at.

Logan inwardly seethed, but pasted a huge grin on his face, and turning to Hannah said “let’s get out of here. I’ll get you ice cream.” Despite her protestations for leaving school, Hannah slipped her hand into his as he pulled them through the crowd.

Veronica stopped her laughing short and stared after them. Oh Logan, don’t be stupid. At the same moment, she felt a quick, sharp stabbing pain in her gut. She looked down at herself, expecting to see a needle, or a knife. Nothing was there. She pushed the feeling out of her mind, and looked at Troy. “I have to get to class.”

“Okay, my super-fine super-sleuth. I’ll call you before the party…?”

“Saturday.”

“Saturday.” Troy jumped up and playfully tugged one pigtail. “Talk to you then.” He chuckled and ducked into the throng of students heading back in for fifth period.

+++

The next day Veronica stood in front of her locker, at 3 p.m., pulling books out one by one, sighing at the amount of homework she had to do that weekend. Homework Schmomework. I’m a senior, why do I care about this shit anymore? Oh yes, the words “Kane Scholarship” run through my head every minute on the minute. Hmph. She leaned her head against the edge of the locker frame. Her eyes were drooping and she felt a nap coming on.

“I’d ask you if Troy tired you out, but that would be inappropriate, wouldn’t it?”

She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping that Logan’s voice was just in her head. She opened them, and turned a little to look at him, keeping her head on the locker. She blinked a few times until he came into focus. He was inches away from her face. She peered up at him.

“I’d ask you whether Dr. Griffith’s daughter wears day-of-the-week underwear, but I know that’d be inappropriate.”

“Actually, I don’t think she wears any,” he snarked.

“Dude, she’s like, fifteen.” She rolled her eyes at him.

“Mm. Daddy likes.”

Veronica sighed loudly and shoved the rest of her books into her shoulder bag. She slammed her locker shut. “Well, Senor Echolls, I’m out. Hasta la vista. Vavaya con dios.” She swerved past him, moving toward the exit. She stopped for a moment, and turned back slowly. Logan was still leaning against the lockers. Geez, why does he always have to look good? Even when he’s annoying the shit out of me? She kicked the toe of his shoe with hers, lightly. “Hey.”

He raised his eyebrows at her. “Hey.”

“Be careful, okay? Try not to play with fire.” She winced when she realized the irony of that statement. Brief visions of the inside of a refrigerator sent a shudder through her, chilling her to the core.

Logan saw her reaction to her own statement. He felt a pang of long-ago-buried guilt. Ah, the sins of the father. Instead of a snappy comeback, he patted her on the shoulder. Wow, I haven’t touched her since the day with the Fitzpatricks. It’s nothing, but… “I’ll be careful, Ronnie.”

Her eyes flashed up at him. Hearing that nickname pushed her out of her trance. She gritted her teeth, but relaxed upon seeing his face. He looked concerned; he looked hurt…and something else. She saw something she hadn’t seen in a long time…

…all I want to do is protect you.

…I want you to trust me.

…you’re all I care about.

Instead of biting his head off for calling her Ronnie, she nodded curtly. She turned on her heel and headed for the parking lot, leaving Logan leaning back against the locker, looking bewildered.

+++

Veronica was finishing applying her favorite eyeliner when she heard Wallace at the door, talking with her father. She bit her lip upon hearing Keith enquire as to Alicia. She could hear Wallace hemming and hawing. She knew that in all honesty, Wallace did not even know what was up with his mother. Ever since he returned from Chicago, they hadn’t spoken much. She resented him for leaving with his father, and resented Keith for not driving his father away.

Veronica quickly stepped into the living room, hoping to quash all talking about Alicia. Keith looked at her, and the corners of his eyes crinkled. “You look beautiful, honey. Why so dolled up? Isn’t it just a party?”

She started to speak, but Wallace interrupted. “Oh yeah, but she’s got college dudes to impress now.”

Oh Jesus, Wallace. Way to go. She hadn’t told her dad about Troy.

“College boys?” Keith echoed, with a look of concern painted on his face.

“Huh? Wallace is crazy. As Weevil would say, this boy is muy loco. We’re out Dad, see ya!” Veronica grabbed Wallace’s arm and dragged him out the door. She could faintly hear Keith’s voice behind her… “College boys?”

“Dude. No. For real.” She glared at Wallace.

“Uh oh. Is spy daddy gonna take away your spy toys?” Wallace grinned, but ducked before Veronica could smack the back of his head. He bobbed back and forth. “I am too fast for your little white ass, BFF.”

“Okay Muggsy. Let’s go.”

+++

After picking up Jane – Jackie had bailed because she was still getting unwarranted flak for her father’s arrest – the threesome headed over to Chez Casablancas.
By the time they arrived, Veronica already felt like a third wheel. Even in the car, Jane and Wallace were touchy feely, and they’d cooed at each other all the way into the 09 zip. When Wallace parked, Veronica immediately bounded out of the vehicle. She rushed to the front door, eager to see anyone else. Hell, I’ll even settle for Dick. This shit is unbearable...

She popped her head through the massive front doors and quickly peered around. Looking to her right, she saw Troy leaning against the foyer wall, talking to Luke. They looked deep in conversation. She tentatively headed over, making sure she wasn’t interrupting. Both boys noticed her and seemed to relax in her presence. She assumed they’d been talking about what had happened over a year ago…and hoped they’d made up. What Troy had done was shitty, but Luke had also been incredibly stupid for associating himself with the Roid-head from the gym.

“Hey guys.”

“Hey V.” Troy brightened when he saw her. Luke grinned to himself. Wow, she’s such a bad-boy magnet. Luke straightened up, and excused himself. “I’ll see you guys later.”

Veronica bumped hips with Troy playfully. “Let’s have some fun. I need some fun. Now.” Troy looked at her hopefully. “No, Mr. Vandegraff. Not that kind of fun. I need a drink.”

“Haha. Well, right after you, my lady,” Troy bowed. Veronica led the way, moving toward the sound of people laughing and talking loudly over blaring gangsta rap. Standing on the edge of the Casablancas family room, she took in the entire scene. Dick was running after Gia, who (finally) looked like she wanted nothing to do with him. Madison Sinclair and her pep squad followers were in a corner, whispering and pointing at people all over the room. Casey Gant was leaned up against the mantelpiece, talking to a pretty sophomore.

Veronica searched and searched till her eyes landed on Mac and Beaver. They were sitting close on the loveseat, sipping from plastic cups, looking googly-eyed at each other. Veronica said exasperatedly, “seriously. What is up with all the couples?”

Troy laughed at her. “Well, considering this is the first time in a long time that you’re actually single, I’m guessing it’s getting to you.”

Veronica gave him a sidways glance. “How did you…?”

“I heard.”

“So you know about…”

“Leo. Logan. Duncan again…”

“Duncan and Meg?”

“Yeah.” He looked sorrowfully at her.

“I’m okay. Really. It’s just…different. I thought things were going back to normal, but…”

“Things are never normal.”

“Yeah.”

Troy put his hand on the small of her back. She smiled warmly at him, but noticed that she felt…nothing. I used to think he was so cute! Maybe it’s because of all he did…but really, he’s totally won me over this week. What is wrong with me?

She stared at the floor for a split second. It’s not Duncan. It’s…

Mac’s voice rung out over the crowd, interrupting Veronica’s thoughts. “V. Mars! Sup!” Veronica swallowed, and nodded to Troy in Mac and Beaver’s direction. They stepped in tandem down into the family room, and Beaver greeted them. “Hey guys – drinks?” Veronica trusted the Beav to get her a drink, so she nodded. Troy moved to help him.

Veronica and Mac sank into the loveseat together. Mac wiggled her eyebrows at Veronica. “Troy is really cute. You guys look adorable together.” Veronica waved her hands frantically in front of Mac’s face. “Mackie. We are SO not together. We’re just friends. I’ve been helping him…”

“Learn the female anatomy in Braille?”

“Mac, you’ve been hanging out in the Casablancas house too long. You okay?” She rubbed Mac’s head.

“I’m great. I really like hanging out with Beaver…so much so that I have learned to avoid Little Dick.”

“Good deal. I’m really happy for you guys. Beaver’s really great, Mac.” Mac grinned at her. She looked like a kid with candy. “He IS great.”

Mac stopped at that. She knew that Veronica had been weird about couples lately. There were her and Beaver, Wallace and Jane, and now Logan and that naïve little sophomore. And somehow she knew the Logan/Hannah pairing was the one weirding her friend out the most.

Suddenly, plastic cups appeared before the girls, and Troy and Beaver followed. The four sat close and started to drink and laugh.

+++

Logan sauntered into Dick’s house, pulling Hannah close behind him. He had not wished to bring her, but Dick opened his big mouth at lunch a few days prior, and Hannah seemed so excited to go to a senior party. As they entered the house, Hannah looked around in wonder. Wow, she really is young. And naïve. He was split on her wide-eyed with wonder demeanor. Sometimes he found it very endearing, and sweet, but most of the time he was shocked that someone this innocent and clueless existed in the Inferno known as Neptune. She was kind, and fun, but something about her reminded him of someone he’d known long ago.

But that girl is gone.

He thinks back to a slight girl with long blond hair, in a yellow cotton sundress. She’s dipping her tiny feet into his pool, as he stares at her from the chaise lounge in wonder. She’s beautiful, but she’s shy. She’s sweet, and funny, but there is nothing that really stands out about her. She’s innocent and calm, and every look across her face is nothing but genuine. She’s an open book. He watches as his best friend walks out to the pool, and, bending down, wraps his arms around this tiny, sweet girl. They kiss chastely and whisper in one another’s ears.

Logan knew, even back then, that he didn’t want a girl like this. He needed a girl with passion; a girl who would shout at the wind without being afraid of the world around her. He had this girl once. Her name was Lilly.

After Lilly died, he didn’t think he’d find a girl with fire or passion again. He was complacent, seemingly pleased with hooking up with every little trust fund baby thrown his way.

And then, one day, the girl in the yellow cotton sundress transformed.
She was mean.
She was bitter.
She was out for revenge.

And he hated her. Or thought he did.

But that mean, bitter, bitchy girl had fire. She had heart. Everything about her was sharp – her piercing blue eyes, her razor-like wit, her convictions… And she was passionate. She grasped at life by its shoulders and shook it.

This girl…was better than the Lilly Kanes of the world. Lilly was brash and flashy, but the transformed girl was…amazing.

Yes, Logan knew that after Veronica, he’d never want a sweet and innocent girl ever again.

He smiled at Hannah, and led her into the Casablancas’s den, where he saw Dick and Casey macking on some younger girls. He slung his arm around Hannah’s shoulders and was content, at the moment, to just enjoy the evening with his new “girlfriend” and his buddies.

+++

“Whoa there Nelly.” Wallace peered around the corner into the Casablancas’s family room. He saw his BFF standing on a couch dancing with Mac. “Veronica Mars? Couch dancing?” Jane pulled him into the room. “Let’s join her!”

Wallace knew she had to be drunk. Oh boy, here we go.

As he approached the girls, he caught sight of Troy. Troy looked a little rough. He caught Wallace by the shoulder and took him aside. “Fennel. Seriously. She has had way too much to drink. I swear – swear – it wasn’t my doing. She just started and didn’t want to stop. I keep trying to suggest that she go home, but she’s having none of that.” Troy looked like a worried father, and Wallace patted him on the back. “It’s okay, man, we will try to handle this.”

He looked up at his best friend dancing with Mac, her arms wrapped tightly around Mac’s waist. Wallace didn’t doubt that if she let go, she would go the way of Humpty Dumpty.

“Hey, V…”

“Wallace!” She snapped forward, as if she had been blind to his presence until that very moment. “Oh goooodness, Mr. Fennel. You look lovely. Wanna dance?” Jane giggled as Veronica slurred her words.

“Raincheck, V. We gotta get you home.”

“But…I’m having fun. I’m dancing with Cindy MacCinderpants and the Beav.” She gasped, in realization. “Wallace…Wally…and the BEAV!” she collapsed onto the loveseat in a wild fit of laughter. “Where are June and Ward?” She looked around with seriousness imprinted on her face, as though she were truly looking for June and Ward Cleaver.

“Hardy har har Mars. Let’s go.” He tried pulling her up, but to no avail. She was tiny, but with God-knows-how-much alcohol in her, she was like dead weight.

“Troy – help me out?” Troy jumped to attention and put one of her arms around his neck. Wallace did the same on the opposite side. They successfully got to the front door, while Veronica babbled all the way. “Mm, T.V., you smell good. What is that smell? You smell like berries.” “Wally, my man, who makes your spirit boxes? Who loves ya, babeeee?” She giggled like a small child. Wallace found this somewhat amusing, but was mostly annoyed. Just as they opened the front door, Veronica mumbled, “Jacket.”

“Huh?” Both boys wondered aloud.

“My jacket’s in the den of sin.”

“Den of sin?”

“Or. Just den.”

Wallace let go of her one arm, forgetting that she was heavy as a stone. Troy grabbed her around her middle, and for a moment, they were face to face. “Mm. Troy. Hiya.” She garbled into his neck. He smiled into her hair, and suddenly threw her over his shoulder. She erupted into giggles as Wallace shook his head. “I’ll go get your jacket.”

“You’ll never find it! Troy, follow him!” Troy obeyed, like the lost little puppy he was, with Veronica still slung over his shoulder.

Wallace turned back as he was walking into the den and cracked a smile at Troy. “You sure got your hands full.”

“Indeed, my friend. Indeed.” He hoisted Veronica up a little higher, and the movement caused her to hiccup. She continued to giggle.

“Well, at least she’s not a sad dru….” Wallace trailed off as he entered the den.

“Well well well. What do we have here?” Dick slurred, looking smarmy. Wallace looked around. Dick was wedged in between Logan and Luke on the leather couch, and to Logan’s right was a thin blonde. He realized it must be Dr. Griffith’s daughter, as Veronica had mentioned.

“Hey guys…we’re just looking for…”

“My jacket. My green leather jacket.” Veronica intoned from behind Troy’s back. Wallace had forgotten for a split moment that they were behind him.

“Well, Miss Mars. Aren’t you in a precarious position?” Dick mumbled, stumbling off the couch and towards Troy and Veronica.

Logan looked at the entire scene with a look of pure bewilderment. He said nothing. Hannah was nuzzling into his shoulder, dozing in and out of sleep. It was past for Miss Princess's bedtime.

Veronica peered at the boys from behind Troy’s back, upside down. “Hey Dickie!” She said cheerily.

Wow, she must be drunk, thought Logan. She looks happy to see Dick.

Dick poised himself to smack Veronica’s denim-clad ass, which was high in the air over Troy’s shoulder. Logan quickly stood up and grabbed Dick’s arm, pushing him back. “Okay, Dickie, I think that’s enough.” He turned back and realized he was face-to-face with Troy. “Hey, man.”

“Hey,” Troy said, nervously.

Wallace had looked around the room for the jacket, but found nothing. “I’m gonna look in the family room and grab Jane. Meet you outside?” Troy nodded.

“Hey, um, Logan…can you help me get Veronica out to the car?” Troy asked, pleadingly. He looked tired and rough around the edges. Logan softened a little, feeling badly for Troy. He had a feeling he’d been babysitting a drunk Veronica for a few hours now.

Logan glanced back at Hannah, whose eyelids were fluttering in and out of a dozing state. “Hannah? Hannah?” She came to, quickly. “Yeah, Logan?” “I’ll be right back.” She nodded and laid her head back down on the couch cushion. He turned back toward Troy and noticed Veronica peering around Troy’s back. She was no longer giggling, or slurring words together. She was looking inquisitively at the young girl curled up on the couch, her brow furrowed. She raised one eyebrow at Logan and then quickly jabbed Troy in the side. “Yo, Vandegraff? We gettin’ this show on the road?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” He looked back at Logan, who gestured them to the door. Once outside, Troy turned to Logan. “I need to grab my car. It’s around back. Would you mind standing here with her for just a second?” Troy realized right away that Logan wouldn’t mind at all. He saw the way Logan was looking at Veronica, filled with concern, a little bit of anger, and…something else.

Logan nodded soundly, and Troy set Veronica down slowly until she was standing between he and Logan, with her back to Logan. Troy walked away quietly, looking back after his first few steps down the Casablancas’s driveway. He then looked straight ahead and didn’t look back.

Logan placed his hand on Veronica’s waist to steady her, for as soon as Troy left, she began to wobble to the right. “Okay there, P.I. Jane. You just have to stay still for one minute.” Veronica moaned softly, and began to fall backward. Logan caught her quickly, wrapping his hands around her tiny waist. He propped her up against his chest, and straightened her up. She seemingly chose that moment to snap to attention, and she quickly swirled around in his arms, so that she was facing him, or rather, his chest. She rested her head against his chest for a moment, sighing loudly. She did not say anything at first. After another beat, she looked up into his face, craning her neck far back. Logan chuckled under his breath at her, as she looked as though she would bend all the way back. He brought his hand to lay squarely on her back, and he pulled her close.

She smelled like rum and lipgloss. The same scent of lipgloss from… the day in the bathroom.

She blinked at him. Her eyes looked kind of watery. She suddenly became conscious of him, aware of his proximity. She placed a hand on his chest, and pushed a little, but gently. “I hate you.”

Ah, there’s the Veronica Mars I’ve seen of late. “You really didn’t have to remind me, Mars.”

“No, I really really hate you.” She tried to narrow her eyes at him, to shoot him an evil stare.

Dear God, she’s trying so hard.

Despite her efforts, a tear slipped down her one cheek.

In a matter of seconds, she had gone from bubbly drunk to sad party girl.

She looked down at her own hand, still on Logan’s chest. She bit down on her bottom lip, not wanting to look at him, not wanting him to see her tears. These tears aren’t for you, Logan. They’re for me.

They stood there, in awkward balance, when Troy’s car swung around the corner. At that moment, Jane and Wallace bounded out. Wallace barely gave Veronica and Logan a second look. He threw Veronica’s jacket into Troy’s backseat and waved to all of them. Logan shook his head, smirking. Wallace looked back at Logan, and for a moment, they come to an understanding without saying a word. Logan knows Wallace trusts him at that moment, and he bows his head with gratitude.

Troy ran around the side of car, opening the door for Logan to place Veronica inside. As Logan prodded Veronica towards the car seat, she muttered softly, almost to herself, “have fun with your little girlfriend.” “Girlfriend? Not so much.” Logan mumbled, into his chest.

He reached around her to pull the seat belt out and snap it safely around her. His head bent close to hers as he fumbled with the buckle. Troy remained behind him, outside of the car.

“Logan, I…” she whispered, into his ear.

I know, you hate me.

“I love you.”

He practically hit his head on the roof of Troy’s car. Logan stumbled back, not sure of what to do, say, or think. Troy, seeing Veronica was buckled in, shut the door and chucked Logan amiably on the shoulder. He had not heard the drunk girl’s mumblings.

“Well Logan, I’ll be getting Miss V. to Bedfordshire. Keith will be happy to see her home somewhat close to her curfew.”

“Yeah. Good.” These were the only words Logan could muster. He stood there, motionless.

Troy didn’t notice, and hopped into the driver’s seat. He waved to Logan.

Veronica pressed the side of her head against the window, not thinking or speaking. As Troy pulled away from the Casablancas residence, she glanced up for a split second at Logan, and for that moment within a moment, she was coherent. And then, they were gone.

Logan stood before the house, and looked down at his empty hands.